Replied By: upsydasy on Jul 25, 2013, 8:00AM - In reply to avreyjade
Reading your post really helped me put things into perspective.  I’m not overweight but I smoke and always feel annoyed by the people who plug their noses when they pass by me on the street (mostly women).  I never felt like a victim, but rather militant and combative due of their blatant rudeness.  I’d think to myself I have an addiction, so mind your own business and get over yourselves.  The ugly images cigarette companies are now forced to print on their packages made me want to thumb my nose at every nonsmoker even more. 

I’ve been smoking for 40 years and never really tried to quit.  But recently, I was given a great gift which made me reevaluate my life and how I treat my body.  I’ve always been blessed with perfect health and like you I was a very active child, but I took it all for granted and still do in many respects.  I suppose that I was waiting for a reason to quit - something to inspire me other than my health since as stated above, I’ve always enjoyed anyway.  Yet even after receiving a gift of a lifetime, I still hung on to my worst habit out of stubbornness and dare I say it: pride… urgh!

The other day I watched a documentary on PBS about Buddhism.  One of the interviewees (a Psychiatrist I believe) related a story that really resonated with me.  He talked about owning a beautiful glass and how it caught the light and shined stunning colors when held at a certain angle near a sunny window.  One day the glass was broken and as a good Buddhist he thought to himself, oh well nothing’s permanent.  At least he remembered to enjoy his glass and tended to it while it was still whole.  That story blew my mind and I thought there is the inspiration that I had been searching for.  My life is not permanent either and I must strive to take better care of myself and stop taking so many things for granted.

Your story is much the same.  You are beautiful, cultured, successful and supremely intelligent.  You were given wonderful gifts in life, but at a cost that many of us will never know.   My compassion goes out to you. 

Thank you for taking the time to post your courageous story.  I read it twice and probably will again just to be sure that I caught every line.