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Replied By: oncology_rn on Nov 14, 2009, 8:37AM
Since my retirement as a Registered Nurse who spent a large amount of her career in Oncology, I have been a devout fan of the show.  Dr. Phil, I can't remember a time that I was so emphatically disappointed with any of your advice, until now.


Although I have enjoyed a long standing relationship with this couple, I am sure Dr. Phil that you will agree my comments here today are in no way biased.  Let me first preface the advice you gave Paul was sound HOWEVER, I truly believe this is the first time I can remember you to have missed the most important aspect of Paul's inability to find work.


DEPRESSION!


Besides being laid off twice since 2004, Paul received the unfortunate diagnosis of prostate cancer at quite a young age.  Although he is currently cancer free, what was not mentioned during the show was that he unfortunately was left with resultant permanent complications which could lead to low self esteem and depression on a grand scale.

For readers who are not aware, the main side effects which may occur with radical prostatectomy are incontinence, the inability to hold urine inside the bladder voluntarily or prevent it's leakage and erectile dysfunction, the inability to achieve or maintain an erection adequate for sexual intercourse. In the hands of a skilled surgeon, nerve-sparing surgery significantly increases the likelihood that impotence and incontinence will be only temporary.  Unfortunately, this was not the case for this patient.


I believe you did your viewers a huge injustice, but most of all Dr. Phil why kick a dog why he is already down?    I am sure it is difficult to cram all the detail history of your guests  in the course of a one hour show, but Dr. Phil--- how the hell did you miss the opportunity to educate your viewers and really help Paul?



Cancer pushes lots of difficult buttons. It lays bare a man's basic vulnerability and underlines the uncertainty of this life. Prostate cancer attacks our culture’s ideal of manhood. The steely-eyed Marlboro Man isn’t expected to worry about incontinence and erectile dysfunction.



It is undoubtedly apparent Paul has been ambushed by depression.  After his initial diagnosis, treatment and waiting to be sure that he was cancer free, it’s almost as if, finally and unexpectedly, Paul's psyche heaved a sigh and gave itself permission to implode.


Paul is not alone in this cancer-caused depression. As many as 25 percent of cancer patients develop depression, according to the American Cancer Society. That’s contrasted with about 7 percent of the general population.



Even though Paul hasn't required  had any treatment for the cancer for two years,, and all of his physical signposts of health are pointing in the right direction.


Paul is  still depressed!


As if fighting cancer wasn't hard enough, a new Dutch study concludes that one in three people who survive the ordeal won't be able to find a job.  Results of the study were published the Journal of the American Medical Association.



Advances in cancer treatment mean that the number of people who survive a cancer diagnosis is on the rise, according to the study. And, nearly half of those who survive cancer are under age 65. However, many who survive cancer are left with physical, emotional and social problems. Such problems may include fatigue, pain, cognitive deficits, anxiety and depression.


So, Dr. Phil this is my two cents for what it is worth.  As a man, you should appreciate what Paul is going through.  I do not feel it is not my place to elaborate in detail of his complications, but Paul did confide in me that "he felt stripped of his masculinity"


You are often so generous in providing guests with appropriate counseling services, how is it you missed every aspect of this obvious diagnosis?  I am sure if you took the time to take Paul aside and speak with him one-on-one, the truth of how he really feels would have been exposed.  After all, as a fellow Brit, I understand how our parents drilled the "stiff upper lip" or as the younger generation now puts it "suck it up" attitude so I know Paul is going through the motions of the search for employment, but the claws of depression have a tight grasp on him, thus he is having having a hard time to become truly  motivated.    As a nurse, I can tell you he is severely clinically depressed.  Her is not the same hard driven, happy go lucky executive I once knew.    Paul is a mere shadow of the man he once was.


I believe you have always provided a valuable source of education to your viewers.  I am sure the producers and writers decide to place a certain spin on a story to increase ratings, as alas that is TV.   What could have been considered would have been the phenomenal opportunity to make this a three part story--  you could have given your advice but also told Paul that he would have the opportunity to do a show with "The Doctors" or "Dr. Oz".    You could have let them educate male viewers and their female partners as to how important it is for men over the age of 40 to begin to have their annual prostate health exam.  The doctors could have explained prostate cancer, the up-to-date procedures that are available, the risks and complications and the depression that envelopes many of these men in a shroud of dense fog.  The doctors may have even addressed if there are any new advances in overcoming resultant complications in addition to the strong support of a psychiatrist or psychotherapist that specializes in dealing with cancer survivors.


At this point, I am not sure what benefit Paul received.  if you asked me he is now more depressed than ever after being portrayed as a lazy husband.    Once again, readers may think I am coming to his defense..... not true, it is not hard to figure out that his less then aggressive job search is fueled by debilitating depression.








 
Replied By: oncology_rn on Nov 14, 2009, 11:41AM
Dr. Phil, if there was ever a story that needed follow-up it is this one!  Why?  I feel you failed to drive the core issue of Paul's inability to go to work-- it is not a matter of pride, it is a matter of DEPRESSION!
It would have been beneficial to know that Paul was offered some sort of professional counseling to address how he must feel after overcoming prostate cancer and the daunting search for employment when in some areas of the US unemployment is close to 11%.
How very sad that Dr. Phil did not address the issue of depression as the mitigating factor as to why the lazy husband wasn't motivated to get up and out and find a job.
Although there was a very brief mention of Paul's prostate cancer, I felt that Dr. Phil was kicking a dog while he was already down.  Albeit, the advice Dr. Phil did provide was direct and to the point, but as a medical professional who knows this couple, it is disheartening for me to know Paul is clinically depressed and this was the core issue Dr. Phil should have driven to resolution in the show by offering some psychological counseling through is vast network of resources that are obviously at his disposal.  

This is what I posted on comments related to the show: 
Since my retirement as a Registered Nurse who spent a large amount of her career in Oncology, I have been a devout fan of the show.  Dr. Phil, I can't remember a time that I was so emphatically disappointed with any of your advice, until now.


Although I have enjoyed a long standing relationship with this couple, I am sure Dr. Phil that you will agree my comments here today are in no way biased.  Let me first preface the advice you gave Paul was sound HOWEVER, I truly believe this is the first time I can remember you to have missed the most important aspect of Paul's inability to find work.


DEPRESSION!


Besides being laid off twice since 2004, Paul received the unfortunate diagnosis of prostate cancer at quite a young age.  Although he is currently cancer free, what was not mentioned during the show was that he unfortunately was left with resultantpermanent complications which could lead to low self esteem and depression on a grand scale.

For readers who are not aware, the main side effects which may occur with radical prostatectomy are incontinence, the inability to hold urine inside the bladder voluntarily or prevent it's leakage and erectile dysfunction, the inability to achieve or maintain an erection adequate for sexual intercourse. In the hands of a skilled surgeon, nerve-sparing surgery significantly increases the likelihood that impotence and incontinence will be only temporary.  Unfortunately, this was not the case for this patient.


I believe you did your viewers a huge injustice, but most of all Dr. Phil why kick a dog why he is already down?    I am sure it is difficult to cram all the detail history of your guests  in the course of a one hour show, but Dr. Phil--- how the hell did you miss the opportunity to educate your viewers and really help Paul?



Cancer pushes lots of difficult buttons. It lays bare a man's basic vulnerability and underlines the uncertainty of this life. Prostate cancer attacks our culture’s ideal of manhood. The steely-eyed Marlboro Man isn’t expected to worry about incontinence and erectile dysfunction.



It is undoubtedly apparent Paul has been ambushed by depression.  After his initial diagnosis, treatment and waiting to be sure that he was cancer free, it’s almost as if, finally and unexpectedly, Paul's psyche heaved a sigh and gave itself permission to implode.


Paul is not alone in this cancer-caused depression. As many as 25 percent of cancer patients develop depression, according to the American Cancer Society. That’s contrasted with about 7 percent of the general population.



Even though Paul hasn't required  had any treatment for the cancer for two years,, and all of his physical signposts of health are pointing in the right direction.


Paul is  still depressed!


As if fighting cancer wasn't hard enough, a new Dutch study concludes that one in three people who survive the ordeal won't be able to find a job.  Results of the study were published the Journal of the American Medical Association.



Advances in cancer treatment mean that the number of people who survive a cancer diagnosis is on the rise, according to the study. And, nearly half of those who survive cancer are under age 65. However, many who survive cancer are left with physical, emotional and social problems. Such problems may include fatigue, pain, cognitive deficits, anxiety and depression.


So, Dr. Phil this is my two cents for what it is worth.  As a man, you should appreciate what Paul is going through.  I do not feel it is not my place to elaborate in detail of his complications, but Paul did confide in me that "he felt stripped of his masculinity"


You are often so generous in providing guests with appropriate counseling services, how is it you missed every aspect of this obvious diagnosis?  I am sure if you took the time to take Paul aside and speak with him one-on-one, the truth of how he really feels would have been exposed.  After all, as a fellow Brit, I understand how our parents drilled the "stiff upper lip" or as the younger generation now puts it "suck it up" attitude so I know Paul is going through the motions of the search for employment, but the claws of depression have a tight grasp on him, thus he is having having a hard time to become truly  motivated.    As a nurse, I can tell you he is severely clinically depressed.  Her is not the same hard driven, happy go lucky executive I once knew.    Paul is a mere shadow of the man he once was.


I believe you have always provided a valuable source of education to your viewers.  I am sure the producers and writers decide to place a certain spin on a story to increase ratings, as alas that is TV.   What could have been considered would have been the phenomenal opportunity to make this a three part story--  you could have given your advice but also told Paul that he would have the opportunity to do a show with "The Doctors" or "Dr. Oz".    You could have let them educate male viewers and their female partners as to how important it is for men over the age of 40 to begin to have their annual prostate health exam.  The doctors could have explained prostate cancer, the up-to-date procedures that are available, the risks and complications and the depression that envelopes many of these men in a shroud of dense fog.  The doctors may have even addressed if there are any new advances in overcoming resultant complications in addition to the strong support of a psychiatrist or psychotherapist that specializes in dealing with cancer survivors.


At this point, I am not sure what benefit Paul received.  if you asked me he is now more depressed than ever after being portrayed as a lazy husband.    Once again, readers may think I am coming to his defense..... not true, it is not hard to figure out that his less then aggressive job search is fueled by debilitating depression.


 
Replied By: oncology_rn on Nov 14, 2009, 11:30AM
How very sad that Dr. Phil did not address the issue of depression as the mitigating factor as to why the lazy husband wasn't motivated to get up and out and find a job.
Although there was a very brief mention of Paul's prostate cancer, I felt that Dr. Phil was kicking a dog while he was already down.  Albeit, the advice Dr. Phil did provide was direct and to the point, but as a medical professional who knows this couple, it is disheartening for me to know Paul is clinically depressed and this was the core issue Dr. Phil should have driven to resolution in the show by offering some psychological counseling through is vast network of resources that are obviously at his disposal.  

This is what I posted on comments related to the show:
Since my retirement as a Registered Nurse who spent a large amount of her career in Oncology, I have been a devout fan of the show.  Dr. Phil, I can't remember a time that I was so emphatically disappointed with any of your advice, until now.


Although I have enjoyed a long standing relationship with this couple, I am sure Dr. Phil that you will agree my comments here today are in no way biased.  Let me first preface the advice you gave Paul was sound HOWEVER, I truly believe this is the first time I can remember you to have missed the most important aspect of Paul's inability to find work.


DEPRESSION!


Besides being laid off twice since 2004, Paul received the unfortunate diagnosis of prostate cancer at quite a young age.  Although he is currently cancer free, what was not mentioned during the show was that he unfortunately was left with resultantpermanent complications which could lead to low self esteem and depression on a grand scale.

For readers who are not aware, the main side effects which may occur with radical prostatectomy are incontinence, the inability to hold urine inside the bladder voluntarily or prevent it's leakage and erectile dysfunction, the inability to achieve or maintain an erection adequate for sexual intercourse. In the hands of a skilled surgeon, nerve-sparing surgery significantly increases the likelihood that impotence and incontinence will be only temporary.  Unfortunately, this was not the case for this patient.


I believe you did your viewers a huge injustice, but most of all Dr. Phil why kick a dog why he is already down?    I am sure it is difficult to cram all the detail history of your guests  in the course of a one hour show, but Dr. Phil--- how the hell did you miss the opportunity to educate your viewers and really help Paul?



Cancer pushes lots of difficult buttons. It lays bare a man's basic vulnerability and underlines the uncertainty of this life. Prostate cancer attacks our culture’s ideal of manhood. The steely-eyed Marlboro Man isn’t expected to worry about incontinence and erectile dysfunction.



It is undoubtedly apparent Paul has been ambushed by depression.  After his initial diagnosis, treatment and waiting to be sure that he was cancer free, it’s almost as if, finally and unexpectedly, Paul's psyche heaved a sigh and gave itself permission to implode.


Paul is not alone in this cancer-caused depression. As many as 25 percent of cancer patients develop depression, according to the American Cancer Society. That’s contrasted with about 7 percent of the general population.



Even though Paul hasn't required  had any treatment for the cancer for two years,, and all of his physical signposts of health are pointing in the right direction.


Paul is  still depressed!


As if fighting cancer wasn't hard enough, a new Dutch study concludes that one in three people who survive the ordeal won't be able to find a job.  Results of the study were published the Journal of the American Medical Association.



Advances in cancer treatment mean that the number of people who survive a cancer diagnosis is on the rise, according to the study. And, nearly half of those who survive cancer are under age 65. However, many who survive cancer are left with physical, emotional and social problems. Such problems may include fatigue, pain, cognitive deficits, anxiety and depression.


So, Dr. Phil this is my two cents for what it is worth.  As a man, you should appreciate what Paul is going through.  I do not feel it is not my place to elaborate in detail of his complications, but Paul did confide in me that "he felt stripped of his masculinity"


You are often so generous in providing guests with appropriate counseling services, how is it you missed every aspect of this obvious diagnosis?  I am sure if you took the time to take Paul aside and speak with him one-on-one, the truth of how he really feels would have been exposed.  After all, as a fellow Brit, I understand how our parents drilled the "stiff upper lip" or as the younger generation now puts it "suck it up" attitude so I know Paul is going through the motions of the search for employment, but the claws of depression have a tight grasp on him, thus he is having having a hard time to become truly  motivated.    As a nurse, I can tell you he is severely clinically depressed.  Her is not the same hard driven, happy go lucky executive I once knew.    Paul is a mere shadow of the man he once was.


I believe you have always provided a valuable source of education to your viewers.  I am sure the producers and writers decide to place a certain spin on a story to increase ratings, as alas that is TV.   What could have been considered would have been the phenomenal opportunity to make this a three part story--  you could have given your advice but also told Paul that he would have the opportunity to do a show with "The Doctors" or "Dr. Oz".    You could have let them educate male viewers and their female partners as to how important it is for men over the age of 40 to begin to have their annual prostate health exam.  The doctors could have explained prostate cancer, the up-to-date procedures that are available, the risks and complications and the depression that envelopes many of these men in a shroud of dense fog.  The doctors may have even addressed if there are any new advances in overcoming resultant complications in addition to the strong support of a psychiatrist or psychotherapist that specializes in dealing with cancer survivors.


At this point, I am not sure what benefit Paul received.  if you asked me he is now more depressed than ever after being portrayed as a lazy husband.    Once again, readers may think I am coming to his defense..... not true, it is not hard to figure out that his less then aggressive job search is fueled by debilitating depression.




 
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