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Abuse Support

 

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Whether it's physical, sexual or verbal, abuse is unacceptable. Are you a survivor? How did you cope? Share your story.

If you believe you need immediate assistance, please call your local emergency number or crisis hotline listed in your local phone book's government pages.

You can also find additional resources by clicking here.

Help end the silence on domestic violence.
Comments
Replied By: bairbre on Aug 18, 2014, 9:56AM
I was isolated. Was not permitted to live to my fullest potential. When I did try to leave, he killed my dog,  another time he gave away my car.   Then turned it all on me.  Of course I believed it,  there was no one to help me remember who I was.  


It snuck up on me,  I was a happy person, full of real joy and my humour was becoming blacker and blacker.  


My friends were alienated,  I was not presentable to the public,  and was only permitted to join the company dinners when his managers had met me.  


How do you explain to someone else the reason you left it so long to leave was because you are forced into the pretence of his protection. 


I thought I was imagining the whole cycle,   I was pretending to be the victim, until the last day.  He had met someone new. I was leaving my children. My home.  I was sobbing,  but had a memory of relief....and he said it:


"AT LEAST I NEVER HIT YOU" 
 
Replied By: bennettshelly on Aug 2, 2014, 1:18PM - In reply to sassyindian
Life has a not so funny way of pointing us in the right direction. I tell myself everyday  that GOD did not let all the bad happen for no reason. It all has a purpose. You capitlazed on your hardships. People like you inspire. Thankyou for your story.
 
Replied By: believe56 on Jul 16, 2014, 2:22PM
Dr. Phil,

I wrote to you several months ago with my story with the hopes that I could create awareness.  I was married for 15 years and endure physical and emotional abuse.  In 2008 I was held at gun point and was physically abused while my 4 year old daugther slept in the other room.  Held capture for hours until the storm passed the next day I found the strength to call for help.  But like so many women I couldn't believe it was happening to me.  I felt like I was living someone elses life.  The guilt and shame was overwhelming, I desperately didn't want this to be happening.  What I did next is what I 'thought' I should.  I secured the best attorney for my husband, the best counslers and best programs offered for sustance abuse.  Thousands of dollars later it seemed he was on the right road.  How I could be so wrong is beyond me.  I mean I am an educated women, with a great career and have been successful in all aspects of my life.  Here I am 5 years later and experiencing the same thing.  I finally got the courage to say NO MORE and filed for divorce in Sept 2013.  I received a no contact protective order which he violated 4 times, I received a domestic abuse protective order which he violated 3 times!  When I pressed charges, they were all dismissed.  So here I am with a piece of paper that says I am protected, but am I?  His most recent espisode was to be seen lurking in my backyard.  Again, no action taken against him.  But the emotional abuse continues, but this time it is from my husband and the court system.  At my pre-trial hearing I was ordered to pay my abuser alimony!  Imagine having to pay the one person who disrupted your life and abused you because the laws are so outdated.  Needless to say, alimony needs to be reformed country wide.    Just when I worked and paid attorney's to protect my daugther I felt the worse was over, but once again I am on the receiving end of outdated laws.  While trying to deal with the divorce I lost my father, my rock.  And, yes to my surprise, now my inheritance is being looked at as an asset even though my father knew what a horrible person my husband was he protected it in a trust, but family law is so different.


There should be laws that protect a person who is a victim of abuse from being emotionally, physically and now financially protected.


No one seems to hear, do you hear me?
 
Replied By: noonehelped on Jul 1, 2014, 9:41AM
My divorce is final. It was between 2 states. I of course was the one who had to travel out of state 2 court and more. much more with no money. My x husband unlawfuuly evicted me from home with abuse. He was having an affair. I did not know he was home every night. He led me to believe he was losing his mind. I was doing back flips to get him help.


He put bug spray in my drink

gave me meds to cause me to bleed out

Held loaded gun to my head(have note from a lawyer telling her how I told her .-the guns were legally taken away fro him. 2 states thyought it was right to give them back to him

pulled knife on me

was giving some kind of meds that caused my lips to feel and look like someone put acid on them(have notes from both dr and dentist)

damaged most furniture walls fridge ect.

was trying to set me up to get arrested

forged my name all over the place

forged a notary( notary never existed)

Him and girlfriend cancelled one of my fraud complaints

girlfriend was stalking me

shoved cell phone up my rectum

was drugging me and sexually abusing me while knocked out but never touched me otherwise

sold my sons car.so had to forge his name to do so then got it back and damaged it and another of his cars and took title. damaged to the point of yhaving it junked

hid mail from my son from IRS

took and hid all mail

took all monies


I lost everything and could go on. How did he get away with all of this. Forged my name on paper for attorney general. The ag office told me if that was true he would be in trouble and so would they. They stopped taking my calls.


He lied to the prosecuter while trying to expunge an arrest.. Can this be fixed. I do not want him to get away with this. I want justice and what was mine. There is so much more. The state we moved too said they cannot help me beccause I am in another state. The state I am in says they cant help me because everything happened in the other state. Someone please please give me some advice
 
Replied By: lssanders on Jun 23, 2014, 7:33PM - In reply to Pleasance
I am worn down and worn out! Wish I could make it in this world all by myself. He is sick and tired of taking care of me. Said once, if he could kil me and then kill himself and get away with it then he would!  Just die and I will bury you he said! Now he denies saying all of that. He says I set him off. We were grocery shopping and something I said got twisted around. Oh my gosh. I had no idea he was even mad until he slammed things on the check out counter. So embarrassing.  That was two days ago. Vacation? Is he serious??? No way!
 
Replied By: flower4960 on Jun 18, 2014, 7:05AM - In reply to jcwright
Yes i am😄i want to smile always i hope can stay focus.
 
Replied By: flower4960 on Jun 13, 2014, 5:25PM - In reply to wingedrunner
I am speaking to someone to help me out and she helps verbally absive women like to get out before ot gets worst i will keep updates, thank everyone for your advice he help relize i am a person that doesn't need to take it anymore. Thanks again
 
Replied By: wingedrunner on Jun 12, 2014, 9:57PM - In reply to jcwright
Im wondering too. How are you flowergilrl? How is the progress? Where are you at now?
 
Replied By: jcwright on Jun 11, 2014, 4:24PM - In reply to flower4960
Let me know if you are going to take the step to freedom.
 
Replied By: flower4960 on Jun 11, 2014, 9:00AM - In reply to crazywoman2014
You are very strong willed person, im trying to be strong likd everyone on this page. It is true gou see everything in your marriage is wrong and everyone in his family says he wrong for being verbally a abusive. Everyday there is more and more of the same hes vets mad and its my fault. I can't talk right i can't be taugh cause im stupid. I say to him lets just divorce and he gets more angrier and tells me everything is my fault. I want so bad for my son and i to have normal life again but i don't. Know what that is. I've been married for almost 8 year and he has sex with me 5 times only that make me beleive that he is having an affair but defend himsslf and say yor f×××× crazy.i strugle from anxiety very bad some days and he say he not b is fault for hlme having that i said to him i do blame you for most of it but because i have been weaken by you i can't. Beat most days. My 15 year old son and i get blame for eblverything nomatter good or bad. It sadden me to say that i feel broken.
 
Showing 1-10 of total 1673 Comments