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Replied By: icareaboutpeop on Sep 11, 2016, 10:51PM
Important your other email was return as undeliverable at same listed email address. If all doesn't go through my blog or story is on Google home page Dave M. Inbox x Dave M. <dsm4857@gmail.com> 11:26 PM (6 minutes ago) to contactus Dave M. Trying to understand and live day to day. Sep 10, 2016 FENTANYL, PAIN PILLS IN GENERAL AND XANAX!

This is a subject that hits close to home for me and millions of others. I am tired of hearing about kids, adults and even famous people dying from pain pills, especially now Fentenyl and Xanax.

To begin with these are very much needed medicines. Used for everything from having a tooth pulled, root canal surgery, being in a car accident that was not even your fault but having broken bones and surgery, chronic pain to end-stage cancer and everything in between. Most if not all the person(s) involved never asked to have any of these especially especially cancer and chronic pain..

Pain pills are needed and very much so. WHAT ABOUT PEOPLE WITH CANCER AND CHRONIC PAIN ARE THEY JUST SUPPOSED TO SUFFER? I AM SURE EVERYONE FROM THEMSELVES TO THEIR LOVED ONES. THEY HAVE SEEN IN OR FELT THE AGONIZING PAIN AND SOMETIMES THESE PEOPLE EVEN WITH PAIN MEDICATION ARE HURTING UNTIL THE DOSAGE GETS RIGHT FOR THEM. DO YOU REALLY WANT TO SUFFER OR HAVE A LOVED ONE OR FRIEND GO THROUGH HELL WHEN THERE WAS PAIN MEDICATION ON THE MARKET THAT WOULD HELP AND DOCTORS PRESCRIBING THE MEDICATION NOT FOR MONEY BUT BECAUSE THEY CARE ABOUT PEOPLE AND VALUED THEIR OATH? A LOT OF DOCTORS WORKED HARD TO BECOME A DOCTOR NOT FOR A "WHITE COAT" OR THE MONEY(many have loans that will take years to pay off) NOR TO DRIVE A FANCY CAR OR LIVE IN A BIG HOUSE! BUT SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY LOVED PEOPLE AND WANTED TO TRY AND CURE THEM OR AT LEAST MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER.

Ever see a couple married for many years lets say 50 or more? Then one or the other gets sick and died then the other died from a broken heart within days or weeks. Or a husband or wife gets sick and they can't stand to see the other suffer and kill the them then themselves. Did you know on a fixed income that couldn't afford the pain medication or find a doctor brave enough to write a prescription for pain medication due to these shows making the doctor so afraid of the DEA. I actually have seen a doctor cry trying to decide if the risk of losing their hard earned license to practice medicine and helping others out weighs the writing for the pain medication. This is how bad these shows, stories and parents in denial going after everyone not thinking of those who need it is having such an effect on so many good decent people. I have seen a loved on suffering and it hurts to the core.

THEY RISK CATCHING WITH THE PATIENT MIGHT HAVE LIKE "ZIKA" AND OTHER VIRUS INCLUDING AIDS BY NOT EVEN WEARING A FACE MASK AS IT MIGHT SCARE THE PATIENT WHO IN MOST CASES IS ALREADY SCARED AND WORRIED.

They call it "Practicing Medicine" as it is NOT an exact science, not all is known but they try with every ounce of their being to make "breakthrough" to save lives and help the suffering. The doctors are reading up and learning of new findings everyday mostly when were home with a beer watching TV. Other doctors have dedicated their lives to finding "breakthroughs" in medicine like they have in genes for breast cancer and other cancers, Polio and a long list of other illnesses including AIDS. Most working now hard on this "ZEKA " virus which was brought to the US by Haitian pregnant women. Many other doctors work endless hours for little pay because they care. Then pass the information to your regular doctor so he or she can apply what they have just learned to help their patients. This goes on EVERYDAY OF EVERY YEARS GOING BACK MANY, MANY, MANY YEARS.

I would just like to touch on this "ZIKA" virus which really has nothing to do with this main story. I am NOT a doctor or expert in any way concerning medicine. When I wrote about "ZIKA" when it first came to light the beginning of August 2016. I believed it was the Aug. 3, 2016 blog. The "experts" said it was a "small area in Wynwood Miami, Fl. Dade County ". That is was "contained" and could only be caught by being pregnant women from these third world countries and "nothing for anyone to worry about for anyone else even already pregnant women in the area".

I using research and common sense said to be careful this is just the beginning and will spread and I felt would not only affect other pregnant women but men and women who were NOT pregnant. I was sent emails and reviews from these expects saying "I didn't know what I was talking about and it's contained and over" and "I was causing a panic over something very minor" just to name a few remarks I received.

IN THE PAST 6 WEEKS WEEKS THE "ZEKA" VIRUS HAS SPREAD ALL OVER THE STATE EVEN AFFECTING A TEEN BOY IN TAMPA AND A MAN IN WEST PALM BEACH. NEITHER LEFT THE COUNTRY OR AREA, TRAVELED TO WYNWOOD MIAMI INTO THE "ZONE" OR KNEW ANY PREGNANT WOMEN WHO HAD IT. THE "EXPERTS" HAVE NOW FOUND "ZEKA" IN LOCAL NON PREGNANT WOMEN, MEN , BOYS WHICH THEY NOW SAY CAN CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE IN THESE MALES AND WOMEN NOT PREGNANT. A "ZIKA ZONE" WAS FOUND IN MIAMI BEACH THAT TOOK CARE OF THE TOURISTS. WITH HOTELS REPORTING OVER A 90% CANCELLATION RATE. AND NOW "ZEKA" IS MOVING TOWARDS OTHER STATES WITH NO CURE IN SIGHT.

OUR GOVERNOR ORDERED ALL PREGNANT WOMEN TO LEAVE MIAMI DADE COUNTY AS IF THE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF THESE WOMEN SOME ILLEGAL HAD ANY PLACE TO GO. BUT SOME DID GO TO THE NEXT COUNTY BROWARD(FT. LAUDERDALE). SO WE NOW HAVE "ZEKA" ALL OVER AND THE BILLION DOLLAR TOURIST AREA MIAMI BEACH IS ALMOST DEAD, WOMEN, MEN AND EVERYONE SCARED AND CATCHING IT DAILY AS NEW CASES ARE REPORTED EVERYDAY ALL OVER THE STATE. PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE BEEN IN ANOTHER COUNTRY TO CATCH IT AND ALL OF THIS I MENTIONED EARLY ON IN MY ONE BLOG ON "ZIKA".

So with no cure in sight, the virus moving quickly out of Florida to other states. And even the Bahamas a big resort area are stopping these pregnant women from coming into their country and I am sure other areas will follow them and not allow anyone from Florida along with males and women some not pregnant to enter their country till this "epidemic" is over if ever? SO NOW THE "EXPERTS" ARE SPRAYING BY PLANE TO TRY AND KILL GROUND BASED MOSQUITOES THAT DID NOT WORK IN WYNWOOD MIAMI "GROUND ZERO" FOR THIS VIRUS AT ALL. THEY ARE SPAYING A TYPE OF POISON THAT IS BANNED IN MANY COUNTRIES DUE TO HEALTH HAZARDS AND SIDE EFFECTS. THERE ARE MANY RESIDENTS PROTESTING THIS SPRAYING AND THEY ARE IGNORED AS USUAL. THE TOURISTS HERE ALREADY JUST LEAVE EARLY AS THEY KNOW THE RISKS OF THIS POISON FROM THEIR COUNTRY THAT ALREADY HAVE BANNED IT'S USE. IT DOESN'T WORK AS WYWOOD AS SHOWN, THEY ARE SPRAYING IT ON ALL PEOPLE YOUNG AND OLD, HOMES, CARS AND THE LAKES, WATERWAYS AND OCEANS THAT MAKE UP MIAMI BEAUTIFUL BEACHES AND AREA. RESIDENTS, TOURISTS ARE NOW WEARING SURGICAL MASKS. PARENTS NOT ONLY HAVE THEIR CHILDREN IN MASKS BUT ARE KEEPING THEM AND THEMSELVES INSIDE AND OUT OF SCHOOL AND AWAY FROM THE THE BEACH. THE FACTS ARE CLEAR FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD HOW DANGEROUS THIS POISON IS. SO NOW I GUESS THANKS TO OUR GOVERNOR SAYING TO GET OUT OF MIAMI THEY REPORTED THAT SPRAYING IS TO BEGIN IN BROWARD COUNTY(FT. LAUDERDALE WHERE MANY FRUIT GROWING FARMS FOR ORANGES AND GRAPEFRUIT ARE IN BROWARD COUNTY THEN SPRAYING IN PALM BEACH COUNTY! AND AS THEY HAVE SHOWN IT DOESN'T MATTER IF IT WORKS OR NOT AND IF IT'S WHAT THE RESIDENT TAX PAYERS WANT WHICH THEY DON'T A DANGEROUS POISON SPRAYED ON THEM, THEIR FAMILIES, HOMES AND BEACHES! THEY ARE GOING AHEAD WITH THE SPRAYING. NO ONE CAN EVEN SAY HOW LONG THE POISON LASTS.

And I did write this was going to happen just not the poison spaying at the time of the blog just using research and common sense that our officials don't seem to have.. These women keep coming when there is no cure. How they get in the U.S. with this virus legally is beyond me. But being the babies with or without "Zika" are born in the U.S. making them automatic U.S. citizens. So they are allowed to stay in the U.S. and out of sympathy they then let the mother stay. They even have a name for this "Anchor babies". Then in almost every case illegal or not the husband and other kids get over here and then hide. Using the precious few resources for the medical. hungry, homeless(especially Vets.), Food stamps, Welfare, SNAP, WICA, Section 8 housing using up what was for the poor, homeless families and others. All U.S. citizens who most paid taxes at one time or another. I am NOT heartless just being real.

With all the items collected for the starving and dying babies in countries like Haiti and Africa along with church groups like the famous Duggar family(19 and counting" TV show and books they wrote which now when everything came to light and the parents knew about the eldest son's crimes years ago and hid them to keep on TV and the money are a joke. Even when they were supposed to be on Oprah's show some years back they heard rumors which were true and cancelled them on the spot. And Oprah earned a lot of respect especially from me for standing by her morals. And in another interesting note the parents reported this to a friend who happened to be a State Police Officer all though no report was found or filled and they said he said "don't worry about it". He is now serving a 55 year prison sentence for having Child Porn and like many wonder who kids were on this porn Jim-Bob?) and their incest, moral less, wife cheating eldest son. Whose family claims to constantly visit to teach and bring supplies to these third world people and come back with pictures of the children in trash dumps looking for food, buildings full of hungry new born children, kids with bloated, empty stomachs and so on to tug at our heart strings. And these are also seen on commercial where only a small part of your donation gets to these kids the rest to actors and company leaders asking for the donations. WHY CAN'T AT LEAST SOME OF THESE CHURCH GROUPS OR DUGGARS TAKE A DAY TO TEACH THESE WOMEN AND MEN ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL, KEEPING THEIR LEGS CLOSED, THESE HUNGRY DYING KIDS ARE THEIRS AND IF YOU CAN'T CARE FOR THEM AND FEED THEM THEN STOP HAVING THEM?

Also just to show a little about the Duggar's and their wonderful TV family we watched for years growing up and hiding the truth that didn't suit them doing only good and not caring about the money from TV and books that they were meant according to Michelle the mother "to educate people" and the money never mattered. Nor I guess the cover-ups of incest, cheating, sexual activity while married with other married women including prositution by their older son the only one we know about when they said they used "Half Hugs". no kissing, girls always in skirts and those being long to keep from any sexual thoughts or feelings till the girls could "court" but still must have a chaperone even after getting engaged and still not a kiss till they were legally married! Then started to kick out babies like their mother and like with her even at 50 years old and the babies dying or being born sick or with other medical and physical problems good old Jim-Bob not Walton but the grown father kept trying to get Michelle pregnant. THE POINT TO THIS LAST PARAGRAPH IS OF COURSE A FEW YEARS AGO WHEN ALL THIS CAME TO LIGHT THE NETWORK AND LONG TIME SPONSERS HAVING MORALS CANCELLED THE SHOW RIGHT ON THE SPOT. HOWEVER, THEY HAVE SNEAKED BACK ON TV USING THE GIRLS NAMES ONLY JILL AND JESSA WHO ARE NOW MARRIED BUT SHOWING THE WHOLE FAMILY PARENTS INCLUDED CALLED "COUNTING ON" BUT NOT ON EARLY LIKE 19 AND COUNTING WAS AND OTHER FAMILY WHOLESOME SHOWS BUT 11 PM EST. AND INTERESTING THE ADVANCE ADS, COMMERCIALS FOR THE SHOW, ARTICLES IN TV GUIDE AND OTHER PAPERS AND MAGAZINES NEVER APPEARED JUST THE SHOW AND WHO IS THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER NONE OTHER BUT JIM BOB DUGGAR!

i WATCHED THE SHOW AND EVEN LIKE AND WATCH THE BATES WHOM SEEM LIKE A REAL DECENT FAMILY BUT ALSO WATCH NCIS, THE NEWS, CODE BLACK, CHICAGO HOPE, LAW & ORDER, DUCK DYNASTY AND MANY OTHER PROGRAMS.

I am going to add just a few more thoughts then I promise back to the pain pills. And I am sorry as I do tend to wonder off the main subject not being a professional writer, never taking a course in writing or very good in grammar and English in school. This blog only started because people I know said you do research, have the facts and care about right and wrong along with caring about people you don't even know. You make good choices and sense on issues why not share it with others do a blog which I knew nothing about? I also never took typing in school so sorry about typos, run on sentence and other mistakes. I also never took a lesson in writing a blog as back then no one knew what a blog was and with my accident and dad I have been too busy now.

I have kind of made it a point not to write about politics. But know it's hard not to write something especially as the main election gets closer. For the first time I can remember in my 50 plus years we have 2 opponents so bent on ripping the other. I HAVE NOT HEARD ONE THING ON THE ISSUES LIKE GLOBAL WARMING, TAXING THE RICH NOT THE POOR, PEOPLE HAVING TO WORK THREE JOBS TO PAY THE BILLS, HOMELESS FAMILIES, VETS AND OTHERS, THE HUNGRY AND POOR, ISIS PROBLEMS(AND THAT DOESN'T MEAN SAYING THE CURRENT PRESIDENT AND THEN SECRETARY OF STATE NOW HIS RUNNING OPPONENT FOUNDED ONE OF THE MOST MURDERING OF INNOCENT PEOPLE AND JUST PLAIN KILLINGS GROUPS ALL OVER THE WORLD ALONG WITH MAKING EVEN U.S. CITIZENS AND PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD SCARED AND ON CONSTANT EDGE( ONE REASON FOR XANAX). ONE REASON MANY ESPECIALLY AFTER NOT ONLY 9/11 WHICH HAPPENED YEARS AGO TODAY AND IS STILL FRESH IN OUR MINDS BUT DAILY HIJACKS AND BOMBINGS AROUND THE WORLD THAT STATEMENT WAS INCOMPETENT ENOUGH FOR SOME PEOPLE JUST WALKING AND TALKING BUT NOT FOR SOMEONE RUNNING TO LEAD THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH. BUT THEN YOU HAVE THE OTHER PERSON CLINTON LYING ABOUT EMAILS, NOT LISTENING TO ADVISERS, KNOWING BETTER AFTER YEARS IN POLITICS AND HAVING A HUSBAND AS PRESIDENT. COME ON NOT KNOWING WHAT A "C" MEANT IN AN EMAIL CLASSIFIED WHEN THE REST OF THE WORLD DID. HAVING ENOUGH CELLS PHONES, BLACKBERRIES FOR TEN PEOPLE ALL ON UNSECURED SERVERS IN FOREIGN COUNTRIES, DESTROYING THEM WITH A HAMMER WITH THE COMPUTER INSIDE STILL ACTIVE, LYING ABOUT WRITING NATIONAL SECURITY MATTERS AND SO ON. YOUR REFUSING TO ADDRESS THE SUBJECT IS NOT HELPING YOU OR YOUR TRUST RATING AS THE POLLS HAS SOON. PEOPLE TEND TO BELIEVE THE LAST THING THEY HEARD IN LIEU OF MORE AND NEWER INFORMATION. HIDING WILL NOT MAKE THIS GO AWAY. JUST LIKE HEALTH ISSUES.

PEOPLE NAMELY VOTERS AND FUTURE VOTERS WANT ANSWERS! AND NOT JUST TO THIS BUT U.S. AND WORLD ISSUES. NOT WHY YOU FORGOT A BRIEFING ON SECURITY OR COUGHING AND UNABLE TO SPEAK FOR FOUR MINUTES THEN TODAY NEARLY PASSING OUT AFTER ONLY ONE HOUR AT THE 9/11 MEMORIAL.! SUPPOSE THERE IS ANOTHER 9/11 OR WORST NUCLEAR PROBLEMS. AND IT'S BOTH OF YOU KNUCKLEHEADS. WERE DONE WITH DONATIONS TO CHARITY, COUGHING, FORGETTING, COLLAPSING, EMAILS(JUST APOLOGIZE LOOK AT WASERMAN-SCHULTZ THE HEAD OF THE DNC. SHE APOLOGIZED MOVED ON AND WAS JUST REELECTED BY A LAND SLIDE) LYING AND SO ON. NAME CALLING IS FOR CHILDREN OR HAVE YOU BOTH FORGOTTEN THAT TOO? START ADDRESSING WHAT THE VOTERS WANT TO HEAR THE ISSUES AND WHAT YOU'LL DO ABOUT THEM AND I DON'T MEAN BUILDING A WALL! WE KNOW ENOUGH ABOUT YOU TWO AND YOUR PROBLEMS BUT NOTHING ABOUT WHAT YOU WILL DO IF ELECTED PRESIDENT! THERE ARE ALWAYS WRITE-IN VOTES AND MAYBE MICKEY MOUSE OR DONALD DUCK WILL WIN THIS YEAR JUST ON WRITE-INS.


Sorry everyone now back to the main story medications. ON TV shows and the news from Dr. Phil, 20/20. Prince and too many others to mention. They NEVER mention the people these pills were made for and needed daily and badly.

The makers of Fentanyl never wrote or said to mix with HEROIN AND INJECTED IN ARM OR MAKE HOMEMADE PILLS WITH OTHER DRUGS WHICH KILLED PRINCE AND MANY OF THE KIDS AND ADULTS. Fentanyl is 100 times stronger then Morphine yes, 100 times and when taken correctly you wear a patch which is changed every 3 days(72 hours) and comes in 12 mg, 25 mg, 50 mg,75, and 100 mg. They also make ONE other product and that is like a lolly-pop for pain relieve right away. Again NO pills or anywhere do they say to mix it with heroin. That is what is killing these people(they have no idea how strong Fentanyl is especially taken at full strength at once and how to take it) along with other medications being abused.

A major problem are these shows never mentioning the real use for these drugs PAIN! Yes the company in it's initial ads and papers sent to doctors saying it was NOT addictive and other lies. They were also fined together almost a BILLION dollars. But, there is NO generic Fentanyl or anything like it on the market and so it is needed.

On these TV shows especially like "Intervention" when the person is still alive. Some and a lot of "some" claim they took it from their parents medicine cabinet and for months to years. These parents are in DENIAL and big time as anyone who these drugs prescribed by a doctor for pain and Xanax for other medical reasons are fully aware that under the law they can only get it month to month being a controlled substance. So they would be taking it as prescribed. Then they would be running short every month from the many pills these kids and others claim they were stealing. ANYONE knows especially those who really need them by running short they are going to have bad pain, other medical problems and even start withdrawal symptoms. And anyone who has gone through withdrawn even once is fully aware you do not want to go through it again especially every month. Withdrawal starts in as little as 24 hours. ALSO IT IS CLEARLY MARKED ON THE BOX, INSTRUCTIONS AND EACH PACK HOLDING THE FENTANYL PATCH IT'S FOR PEOPLE ALREADY ON OPIATES FOR A LONG PERIOD OF TIME!

These parents could have locked the medicine cabinet, move the pills, put them in a lock box or any number of other safe places. I am sure if they had young children and with all the warnings on the bottle, with the paper work that comes with the medication and common sense that would not leave a bottle on the table that a young child could find and reach them. Of course people in their right mind would not do this and the parents on TV look very sane.

Others who said their child died from stealing another drug called Methadone. The patient is warned it's poison and must be closely monitored by your doctor. It's poison and very dangerous plus you got them for a reason and would be running short monthly! Also they are so dangerous not even those now closed "Pill Mills" would sell or write a prescription for Methadone.

These idiots like even Dr. Phil and his experts never asked why the parents had the drug(s) to begin with, what happened when they ran short monthly? And the pain pills were made FOR BAD CHRONIC PAIN AND CANCER PATIENTS TO NAME A FEW SO WHAT HAPPENED TOWARDS THE END OF THE MONTH WHEN SO MANY WERE MISSING DUE TO THEIR KIDS THEFT OF THEM? DID THEY, THEIR LOVED ONES OR PATIENT IF THEY WERE A CARE GIVER JUST SUFFER? AND WHEN THE NEW MONTH STARTED WITH THE NEW SUPPLY OF THE MEDICINE ESPECIALLY FENTANYL AT MAX. OR HIGH STRENGTH WITH THE SUDDEN SURGE(AS THE PAIN GETS WORST OR FOR OTHER MEDICAL REASONS A DOCTOR EASES THE PATIENT INTO THE HIGHER DOSES OF THE DRUG(S) DUE TO THE DANGEROUS RISKS INVOLVED OF STARTING AT A HIGH DOSE OF ANY DRUG) OF THE HIGH DOSE OF PAIN MEDICINE INTO THEIR SYSTEM COULD HAVE EASILY GIVEN THEM A HEART ATTACK OR STROKE WHEN THEY HAD TO DO WITHOUT THE PAIN MEDICATIONS THE LAST WEEKS OF THE PREVIOUS MONTH. THIS IS ALL COVERED ON THE BOX, PACK, BY THE DOCTOR AND PAPERWORK IN BIG RED LETTERS AS IT'S A REAL WARNING!

THESE KIDS WEREN'T JUST RISKING THEIR OWN LIVES BUT THOSE THE MEDICATION(S) WERE MEANT FOR. GOT THAT PARENTS?

I AM SORRY BUT I REALLY DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THESE KIDS, ADULTS AND "STARS" WHO DIED FROM THEFT OF DRUGS THEY KNEW NOTHING ABOUT, ILLEGAL DRUGS AND ALL THE OTHER REASONS THEY OVERDOSED TAKING DRUGS NOT MEANT FOR THEM. OR THE INCOMPETENT PARENTS NOW IN DENIAL AND MAD AT THE WORLD. I CARE ABOUT THE MANY OF ALL AGES THESE MEDICINES WERE MADE FOR, THAT NEED THEM DAILY AND WITHOUT TROUBLE GETTING THEM AND GIVE THEM "QUALITY OF LIFE" AND THE ABILITY TO GET UP IN THE MORNING, LOVE, CARING AND DOING THINGS DURING THE DAY WITH AS LITTLE PAIN AS POSSIBLE! IT'S HARD ENOUGH FOR A LOT OF THEM TO KNOW THEIR DYING OR THEIR LOVED ONE(S) ARE WITHOUT BEING IN SO MUCH PAIN THEY CAN'T EVEN GET OUT OF BED OR UP. THEN WONDERING IF THEY CAN GET THE MUCH NEEDED PAIN MEDICATIONS BECAUSE OF THESE PARENTS ON WITCH HUNTS AND TV SHOWS FOR RATINGS OR RISK HAVING TO LEAVE THEIR OWN HOME AND FAMILY FOR HOSPICE AND NO MATTER HOW WONDERFUL AND GREAT THESE VERY SPECIAL NURSES AND DOCTORS ARE THERE IS STILL THE MENTAL ISSUES YOU'LL NEVER LEAVE ALIVE AND THAT AWFUL "SMELL OF DEATH" I KNOW FROM MANY INCLUDING MY UNCLE. ONE THOUGHT FOR YOU PARENTS OF LOST CHILDREN OR LOVED ONES, TV SHOW HOSTS AND WRITERS, THE DEA AND ALL IT MATTERS TOO. EVER HEAR A CHILD BORN WITH CANCER OR WHO DEVELOPS IT AT A YOUNG AGE, LOOSE AN ARM. LEG OR BOTH, HAVE CANCER IN THEIR BRAIN OR BONES OR EVEN BADLY BURNED OR HURT IN AN ACCIDENT AS BOTH HAPPEN MANY TIMES DAILY. ALONG WITH THE OTHERS IN CONSTANT CHRONIC PAIN FOR ANY NUMBER OF REASONS INCLUDING CANCER? COUPLES MARRIED MORE YEARS THEN YOU HAVE BEEN ALIVE WATCHING THEIR LOVED ONE SUFFER AS HE OR SHE FADES AWAY LEAVING THEM ALONE? THAT WHO THESE DRUGS INCLUDING XANAX WERE MADE FOR AND ARE TAKEN CAREFULLY BY THE DIRECTIONS GIVEN! BUT THE YOUNG CHILD EVEN WITH THEIR PARENTS TRYING TO BE BRAVE BUT CRYING HOLDING THEM AS THEY SCREAM IN PAIN IS BY FAR THE WORST THING ON EARTH! SURE I HURT BUT WOULD GIVE UP MY MEDICINE(S) FOR THESE KIDS TO HAVE A CHANCE TO BE PAIN FREE AND A LIFE IF IT CAME TO IT AND I AM NO ONE SPECIAL! JUST SOMEONE WHO CRIES A LOT ALONE IN THE DARK OF NIGHT. THINK ABOUT THAT IF NOTHING ELSE ON YOUR WITCH HUNTS AND TRYING FOR BETTER RATINGS AND MORE MONEY ON YOUR TV SHOW!

**I would also like to apologize for the last paragraph as it might be long sentences with some out of place and some not making sense or repeated! It was by far the hardest paragraph and words I have ever written and God's truth it's all real coming right from my heart not my brain. But even though being very hard to write I felt it finally had to be written. And through the many tears as I wrote it. I just couldn't reread it any more for any changes as every time I tried I could see less. My apologies.

But some drugs these people have died from like Vicodin is given by dentists and doctors for pain, other pains, surgery. broken bones and a lot of other things. From a few days for a tooth ache and pull to as long as you live for chronic pain and cancer. And please don't ever say you can live with the pain taking Motrin, Advil or aspirin which is like putting a band aid on a cut up your leg that takes 25 or more stitches and that is just an example or aspirin being taken for pain during and after major or any surgery!

Now that we covered the parents denials, Fentanyl does NOT make pills nor say to mix and inject with heroin or anything else. Prince and most other were killed by illegally made pills and other illegal drugs and these shows and experts NEVER mention the people the medications are needed and made for. They just scare the HELL( as maybe half are elderly and know the pain of being without them for themselves or loved ones) of the people who need them and the doctors who have the guts to prescribe them. These groups and shows have the DEA involved and others to stop pills and patches from being made and prescribed. Wait till they need them if they already haven't! NOW SOME REPORTS ARE JUST SAYING KILLED BY FENTANYL NOT EVEN ILLEGAL OR INJECTED! I JUST SAW THIS ON A REPORT YESTERDAY OF A YOUNG MODEL.

Fentanyl is pretty much new in the news but have made big stories due to the number of deaths and Prince of course all from illegal use.

A VERY GOOD SHOW THAT WAS JUST MADE TELLS THE TRUTH ABOUT THE DRUG FENTANYL, OVERDOSES, FALSE ADS AND LIES BY THE COMPANY INCLUDING ALL THE FINES, ALL THE WAYS THESE PEOPLE ARE DYING WITH FENTANYL AS THEY WERE NOT PRESCRIBED FOR THEM AND MAKING PILLS ALSO MIXING IT THEN INJECTING IT AND THOSE IT WAS MADE FOR THE REAL ONES WHO NEED IT. THE SHOW IS CALL "THE NAKED TRUTH:DEATH BY FENTANYL".

There now are real doctors prescribing the medicines and a lot of them had extra training to be "Pain Specialists". All they are guilty of is believing the drug reps and commercials they made and finally the DEA or whomever fined the company and stopped the lies. All the lies and such was not needed anyway as it is a good and needed drug. Then the real side effects and such are put into writing with every box, pill and bottle. THESE DOCTORS ARE NOT THE OLD "PILL MILLS" WHO COULDN'T CARE WHY JUST HOW MUCH MONEY THEY WERE MAKING.

Now you may be asking why is this so personal too me. Well there are a few reasons. And very good and close friend of mine lost both her parents to cancer and the pain that came with it. Then my dad had Pancreatic cancer! He had surgery which showed it has spread all over his body and he was given 6 months to live. That was painful enough having the full surgery then came the cancer pain. He went trough it all Chemo and radiation therapy but nothing worked. He did fight it for 3 years and with dignity and mine and other's respect he fought a good fight. But especially towards the end he would NOT have even been able to get up without pain medication. I watched him go from a strong man to almost nothing like his old self. But he NEVER cried nor felt sorry for himself. I lost my mom, his wife many years ago at the young age of 48 years old to heart trouble and then a massive attack. So he needed me and I was proud to be there for him and others I knew suffering from cancer. And I can assure you I cried enough those 3 years for 5 people. He wanted to pass at home and NOT at a Hospice and of course that wish was honored. He lived in West Palm Beach and myself Cooper City both in Florida about 75 miles apart. But it didn't matter if it was 500 miles he needed me and I was there. He has since passed and with him a good piece of my heart.

The next reason is myself. I was stopped at a red light in my small car and a four time drunk driver hit me from behind. When I awoke six days later from a coma I was told by the doctors I had no brain damage(Thank God), but had a broken back and may NEVER walk again and if so with a cane or walker, broken ribs, shoulder, both knees, ankle, lost teeth and many stitches. I was also told my heart stopped twice at the scene and once in the first and third surgeries each) I have had 12 surgeries thus far but they said with so much damage they can't risk more surgeries on my back.

I had no one not being married or having kids and was alone but for the memory of an old friend I have not seen in years but kept I fighting just in case she ever needed me again. After almost four months in the hospital I then spent well over a year doing PT and still go every year for "Tune-Ups" from stiffing etc. I AM WALKING TODAY AND WITHOUT A CANE OR WALKER!

Now I was told after being in the hospital for about ten days by the police traffic investigators. That the driver who hit me was out on bail for a DUI with death, his blood showed at 10 am he was three times over the legal limit, and included in their investigation and from witnesses reports(which they said was unusual but all agreed on the facts as there was a park bench there with many people waiting) he never braked nor could they could find ANY brake marks, he was driving a truck fully loaded with law equipment and hit me while stopped at a red light full on with the experts estimated at over 80 mph and his speedometer stopped at the point of impact also showing about 80 mph, my car a small one was a convertible and being a regular South Florida morning I had the top down< He hit me with such force my car went end over end 3 times before landing on me with the wheels up in the middle of the intersection and the EMS had to use the "The Jaws of Life" to get me out and it took over half an hour their report stated. I mentioned my heart stopped twice and at one point at the ER I was almost declared dead.

After all this they could only do so much for my back I still have two discs that were fractured that did not heal correctly, Three herniated discs, three bulging discs, four elongated discs and other problems that are CHRONIC now. Plus FRACTURED and not healed correctly and they said they could do NO more surgery because of the risk of more damage and being permanently paralyzed.

There were also permanent damage to my knees and hip that would and did become painful chronic and arthritic along with my back. I take 22 medications a day due to the injuries to my bladder, herth, lungs and other organs.

SO I wear PERMANENTLY 100 MG FENTANYL PATCHES(as I mentioned 100 times stronger then morphine but worn correctly so the medicine is released over 3 days 72 hours) THE MAX. FENTANYL MAKES 100 MG AND FOR "BREAKTHROUGH"(which comes from just sitting down, walking more then a few hundred feet to putting down a dog food bowl) PAIN 150 OXYCODONE PILLS A MONTH.

And I was told WITHOUT them I would NOT be able to move. I used to run marathons as people who looked at my albums may have seen. I never took more then a Motrin or Advil so I decided I didn't need these drugs like Fentanyl and Oxycodone that was already in my system. And those expert doctors who I didn't believe at Jackson Memorial in Miami, the Mayo Clinic in Rochester Mn. and Hersey Medical Center in Hershey Pa. All the doctors agreed no more surgeries and massive pain I could not imagine if I stopped.

SO WHAT DO I DO BUT STOPPED THEM AND AS SOON AS THEY STARTED OUT OF MY SYSTEM I COULD HAVE SCREAMED FOR HOURS AND HOURS. TO THIS DAY I DO MY MEDICINES AS PRESCRIBED. AND MUST SLEEP IN A LAZY-BOY AS THE PAIN IS SUCH LYING FLAT EVEN WITH ALL THE MEDICATIONS IT'S VERY, VERY PAINFUL AND I CAN'T GET UP. I am also given a "Cocktail" of Ambien. Xanax 2 mg and Trazodone and yet still awake after only one and a half to two hours every night in a lot of pain and even taking pills for the "breakthrough" pain I am usually up the rest of the night just listening to the radio then trying to get a nap during the day.

So to Dr. Phil and the rest these parents in denial, kids mixing Fentanyl with other drugs or trying to take it straight which on the box and paperwork warns you it could kill you getting the full dose all at once and not to even use a broken or cut patch for that reason. THERE ARE MANY, MANY PEOPLE WHO NEED AND USE THESE MEDICATIONS CORRECTLY JUST TO BE ABLE TO GET UP. WHAT THESE KIDS, ADULTS AND PRINCE DID WAS TAKE THEM EITHER WRONG OR ILLEGALLY MADE LIKE PRINCE AND THE PILLS.

DON'T GO TO THE DEA TO STOP PAIN PILLS AND SCARE THE HELL OUT OF THE REAL PEOPLE WHO NEED THEM ESPECIALLY PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF, MY DAD AND ANYONE ELSE WITH CHRONIC PAIN OR CANCER OR ANY NUMBER OF OTHER MEDICAL REASONS! THE SENORS ARE SCARED AND I SEE IT EVERY TIME I'M AT THE PHARMACY THAT THEMSELVES OR THEIR LOVED ONES THAT HAVE FELT THE PAIN WOULD LOSE THESE MEDICATIONS OR DOCTORS AFRAID OF THE DEA.YOU PEOPLE ARE PUSHING TO BAN THE MEDICATION GIVING US QUALITY OF LIFE TO GET UP EACH DAY AND MOVE SOMEWHAT PAIN FREE!

IS IT SO MUCH TO MENTION ON THESE SHOWS THESE PILLS WERE MADE AND ARE NEEDED BY SO MANY?

Even from my own insurance company CarePlus who wrote in a report to members as your show Dr. Phil and others including what I thought was legitimate shows like yours, 20/20 and 60 minutes scared many people including cancer victims, chronic people in pain, parents of children born with cancer etc. and the elderly just for ratings that due to some stupid people including Prince and these kids who got pills illegally that were made in someone's basement or others who injected it with other drugs and still snorted other medications that these people who really need the medication will NOT be able to get their much needed pain medications Mainly due to these and your show and these half cocked guilt ridden parent. Careplus Insurance wrote beside not to worry they will always cover prescribed pain medications that concerning all this recent news about pain pills especially Fentanyl and other CONTROLLED MEDICATIONS" "THAT YOUR NOT AN ADDICT IF YOU TAKE A PRESCRIBED MEDICATION FOR MEDICAL NEEDS AND YOUR TAKING IT AS PRESCRIBED BY YOUR DOCTOR".

I DID NOT asked to be hit by a dead drunk driver who walked away with some bruises while I was almost killed. And every person with chronic pain and especially cancer DID NOT ask for that either and the pain and sorrow which goes with it. And the abuse of Xanax which many take for anxiety and depression over losing a loved one, having a sick loved one and for many years married. ISIS. the national alert system going up or being deathly sick yourself. Or just being able with so much pain to relax enough to rest.

I myself have seen people with pain from a tooth being pulled to end stage cancer. All needing something and have also seen people like Dr. Phil and others talking about banning pain pills because of the few who abused them and many stealing them from their parents and of course they not being prescribed for them they never read the warnings or bottle, listened to the doctor's orders on taking them and paperwork with them by a legitimate doctor who cared about the person and NOT the money. THEY HAD NO IDEA OF FENTANYL BEING NEW THE STRENGTH AND DANGER IF MISS USING IT AND HOW THE HIGH DOSE WOULD KILL THEM. SO DON'T BLAME US WHO NEED THEM OR THE DOCTORS ON YOUR WITCH HUNTS!

Dr. Phil I honestly thought your show with the experts was legitimate. But now see you don't care about people as Oprah first said and not ratings and money. But now see all that matters to you is ratings, being renewed and money as in all your shows and there has been many like others on the subject of pain pills and overdoses but NONE have mentioned including your shows why the parent even had the medicine and more IMPORTANT THE PEOPLE THEY WERE MADE FOR AND NEEDED THEM DAILY TAKING THEM AS PRESCRIBED BY AN HONEST DOCTOR WHO CARES ABOUT THEIR PATIENTS WELL BEING AND HEALTH.

One more question Dr. Phil have you ever had surgery without pain medications, dental work, cancer, had or knew someone with chronic real pain that had real surgery, CTs and MRIs? Or seen anyone with end stage cancer or hit by a car or been in an accident they didn't ask for and the suffering before anything is given for the pain? I don't think so because a real doctor who took the oath and anyone with morals with NOT keep much needed medicine for those who truly need it and that it was made for. And NOT mentioning this once on the many shows you and others have done on pain pills and overdoses! I respect Oprah, the Oath and you at one time. But now to see your doing this and especially making doctors afraid to write much needed pain medications and to try and ban the much needed pain medications for ratings and money because of parents in denial, kids and adults stealing drugs not knowing their risks or getting illegal drugs?

And the many lawyers ready to sue a company that is how they make a big living just because people did not reading the bottle, information or instructions that came with the drug. For anyone who cares when there was a phone book before the internet there was three times more lawyers most personal injury then all doctors combined listed.

Dr. Phil it is NOT too late to at least mention on your show and other shows on drugs, abuse and overdoses the need for the pain medications by almost everyone at one time or another!

I also thank God I have a regular doctor, pain doctor and insurance company that knows better then is what is being shown on TV shows like Dr. Phil, 20/20, 60 minutes and others. And also written in papers, magazines and of course the internet. That these doctors and insurance companies know the real truth and are not afraid of you and others like mad parents who now feel guilty and want to go after anyone and everyone no matter why they need the medication(s), shows trying for ratings and more money so they don't do what is morally and medically right. You people especially with your money hungry lawyers ready to sue has scared away in the past baby doctors that even though they knew they were right, did nothing wrong but the lawyers know with the cost and time of depos, court, malpractice insurance they will just settle and with the cost of their lawyers changed their fields of medicine or left the state making it almost impossible to find someone to deliver a baby thanks to these lawyers and shows but mostly the lawyers who depend and know the costs and are even on TV and doctors who did NOTHING wrong but bring a new life into the world want to settle right away and leave while these lawyers are on now even have phones lines set up and ready like 1-800-Bad-Drugs or "call me now to sue the doctor. I want to be your lawyer" so now it's pain pill time and you already scared away many good doctors by your actions from writing much needed pain medications? Even now in my 50's because of shows and abuse I have to show ID just to buy a box of cold medicine at the pharmacy maybe once a year. What is next after baby doctors. pain pills, cold medications for you to try and ban or make it very hard to get for those who need it just for ratings and money?

We didn't want another Jerry Springer I liked many believed in you. I partly due to Oprah whom I greatly respected and some other shows like Dr. Oz who cares about all people. The shame is so many people still believe in you and other shows and are trying to get much needed pills and patches banned without thinking of the real people who need them or even they might in their future for any number of reasons I mentioned. You got what you wanted a "following" now where are you going to lead them?

Dr. Phil I am not a professional writer just someone who sees a wrong like what I wrote about DUIs, "ZEKA" virus, unarmed black men being shoot, good cops being shoot, ambushed and killed due to other's actions, a black caregiver lying on the ground with his hands in the air yelling that is his charge sitting there at his feet playing with a toy truck and suffering from severe Autism and after 10 minutes of not moving or lowering his hands all this caught on cameras(some TV) a white SWAT Marksmen police officer shots the black man lying on the ground hands up and then claims he was aiming for the big white guy with Autism just sitting there scared(It still makes me sick and ashamed of that cop and his supervisor on scene who said after 10 minutes and when the two people made no move or anything he went to his car the moment the cop fired so could not say what happened even with TV crew and a bunch of personal cameras. The caregiver should have gotten a medal for his compassion and love not shot. And this all started with an unknown phone call to 911? He also had a teaser no deadly force was needed and as all have seen this went on for quite awhile and in broad day light. Everyone saw there was no gun or threat to anyone yet you fired! Your a Swat marksman being 10 feet away and said you were aiming for some reason at the big white guy sitting there with a toy truck never moving but very scared and you hit a black man lying flat in the leg instead? How can you even look into the mirror black, white were all humans!! I know I repeated myself but I know many police many put their lives in the line daily for us and just want to get home to their families but take their oath to protect and serve 24/7. I am proud to call many my friends but you make me sick and still do now and that's the truth of the situation!). Other blogs include Illegals and much more and trying to make it right or at least known too other especially out of this area what is happening here along with the truth and what really happened in any given situation along with some personal opinions.

Again I am NOT a professional, did not care for grammar and English in school and never took a course on writing or anything much less a blog. Because of my back and even with all the medications it took 6 days and many hours to get this done. I felt it needed to be said but sorry it's so long and repeated at times as I can only sit for so long and then the pain and stiffness. So rereading when I should be writing was hard especially on this one that hits so many people and so close to my own life..

Please all have a safe and reasonable day,
Dave M.
Email: dsm4857@gmail.com

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Replied By: orijennal on Sep 6, 2016, 5:51PM - In reply to orijennal
I posted this link and it submitted before I was done, this case needs the attention of a third party, it is more than dire, these 2 girls are in severe danger, the mothers attempts for action are falling on deaf ears, this could and does happen to all kinds of people, if something isn't done I fear it will be a headline one day and it will be too late than
 
Replied By: kissesforhugs on Sep 3, 2016, 3:42PM
Is it normal for a mother to call their daughter retarded or a moron even if I know I'm not? Is it normal feeling so down about it I don't want to wake up the next morning? If your asking yes. I have been abused for a while now but through LOVE I stayed put. Even when there was a family willing to give me more love than my mother ever could I have had I stayed. I was abused since I was 18 years old and it still happens today. I recently quit my job at Crabtree and Evelyn and have been trying to get another cause of the constant arguing and embarrassment she ha's given me today and every other weak. Im not afraid to say I'm lazy but whatever she asks me to do I do it. I used to give her half of my money when I used to work. But even that wasn't enough. I tried to give more but if I did there is nothing left for me. 10.25 an hour and they still want me back. This has been going on since then and she says she's been caring me around for double the years. My first job was at a Dunking Donuts and she took all of my money. I tride getting away but even that won't stop her she forced me back into the house saying she was sorry but she never is. She keeps hurting me mentally and emotionally. I should be thankful it isn't physical anymore but then again I wish it was so I don't have to feel the pain inside at least I get to feel pain outside.


....



Is it normal to feel like you were born for no reason at all. And no matter how you try to smile and see the future as a bright one you are always reminded it will not be no matter what? And in some part of your mind you except it and hope the future is nothing but losing your life for a good cause or losing it as you sleep to be fin ally free...Is it just me? Or am I just not normal?
 
Replied By: kingrichard on Sep 3, 2016, 2:37PM
My family labels me with all kind of things. One is that I'm crazy. They thought I was on Antipsychotic meds for years. One day a cousin asked me what I take. I said, "Nothing." She asked, "You don't take meds and your like this all the time!?" I said, "Yes.....SURPRISE." She said, "WOW!!" they thought I was normal because of meds. But they still can't/won't change the way they talk about me as being insane. HELP PLEASE
 
Replied By: lindamw77 on Aug 22, 2016, 10:37PM - In reply to sally_giles
If there are children involved... get them out of the picture because 9 times out of 10 they're being abused too.  you need to report it to the police.  Like Dr. phil says  no man has the right to put his hands on a women.  And if it's a woman doing the abusing, the man just needs to get away from the situation.  Go to the police, go for a walk, talk to a friend, go bowling - throwing that ball will release the hostility.  But be sure to report it to the police abuse from either party is not ok.   As hard as it is, when it's your own child abusing, you have to stand up for what is right.  It could mean saving a life!!!!!  That person needs intervention some how with anger management, or issues with depression, or substance or alcohal abuse.  I don't know the situation.  But he/she needs to find the trigger that sets him/her off and confront it with problem solving tech.  I'm certiainly not a theropist I just remember some of the things Dr. Phil has said and I was a victom of abuse for 18 yrs.  I got out alive.  Best of luck.  Abusers are in denial about something which makes them angry.  The other one has to get out of the situation.  The abuser will only react to help if they want. A counselor said to me once.  I can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped.  So it's the other person that should receive help and know that abuse is not ok.
 
Replied By: lindamw77 on Aug 22, 2016, 10:35PM - In reply to sally_giles
If there are children involved... get them out of the picture because 9 times out of 10 they're being abused too.  you need to report it to the police.  Like Dr. phil says  no man has the right to put his hands on a women.  And if it's a woman doing the abusing, the man just needs to get away from the situation.  Go to the police, go for a walk, talk to a friend, go bowling - throwing that ball will release the hostility.  But be sure to report it to the police abuse from either party is not ok.   As hard as it is, when it's your own child abusing, you have to stand up for what is right.  It could mean saving a life!!!!!  That person needs intervention some how with anger management, or issues with depression, or substance or alcohal abuse.  I don't know the situation.  But he/she needs to find the trigger that sets him/her off and confront it with problem solving tech.  I'm certiainly not a theropist I just remember some of the things Dr. Phil has said and I was a victom of abuse for 18 yrs.  I got out alive.  Best of luck.  Abusers are in denial about something which makes them angry.  The other one has to get out of the situation.  The abuser will only react to help if they want. A counselor said to me once.  I can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped.  So it's the other person that should receive help and know that abuse is not ok.
 
Replied By: xspeakingup on Aug 19, 2016, 9:44AM
The only men in my life from birth proved from their beginnings with me the depths of their wickedness.  Helpless as a 3-year-old (may have begun earlier than this, can only remember back this far) father was a raging alcoholic constantly raging especially when drinking, and emotionally abusive (disgusted with his children, impatient intolerant, frustrated constantly - people who have this experience understand the depth of depravity in a person such as this), and brothers, their friends who were sexually molesting me all before I even knew what my body parts were, or what they signified.  Having fear of death, anxiety, shock, losing innocence, purity, stability, trust, being betrayed, learned in fear how to live, learning to knowi I was also helpless. Praying did not change anything.  Not having anyone to turn to was like being choked - the oppression was horrifying.  On top of all this, everyone otherwise acted in the family as if all was well.  We had great family functions togeher, acting as if nothing wrong ever occurred and stupidly fell for it in hopes these people had changed.  Father has since died, and our relationship was never restored.  Brothers went on with their lives continuing in their denial, betrayal.  Speaking with mother before her death, and seeking consolance from sisters was met with denial, rejection, and saying, get over it, let it go, telling me, "youre paranoid", and that speaking about this would push them away (guess what, you can leave cause I am not shutting up)  This destroyed me and my hope of and trust in and for any good relationships though I have tried to let it all go and life being difficult in and of iteself always have felt like I was "drowning" to survive (know this has to do with the fact none of what occurred against me was ever dealt with).  Knowing what is ideal as relationships has been shaded by these learned, taught lessons of abuse, total disregard, hatred of me and to this day the pain in my heart wells in tears like a permanent scar.  Was not able to protect myself, nor did I have anyone to protect me.

To this day, my relationships with family members are destroyed to a great degree and not because I have not tried to "turn the other cheek," forgive them, but their disregard of me speaks volumes.  

Have sought to receive help,  have worked on this myself, but have come to realize without money (the more money one has, the better help they can receive), there is only so much outside help, as well. 
 
Replied By: xspeakingup on Aug 19, 2016, 9:37AM
The only men in my life from birth proved from their beginnings with me the depths of their wickedness.  Helpless as a 3-year-old (may have begun earlier than this, can only remember back this far) father was a raging alcoholic constantly raging especially when drinking, and emotionally abusive (disgusted with his children, impatient intolerant, frustrated constantly - people who have this experience understand the depth of depravity in a person such as this), and brothers, their friends who were sexually molesting me all before I even knew what my body parts were, or what they signified.  Having fear of death, anxiety, shock, losing innocence, purity, stability, trust, being betrayed, learned in fear how to live, learning to knowi I was also helpless. Praying did not change anything.  Not having anyone to turn to was like being choked - the oppression was horrifying.  On top of all this, everyone otherwise acted in the family as if all was well.  We had great family functions togeher, acting as if nothing wrong ever occurred and stupidly fell for it in hopes these people had changed.  Father has since died, and our relationship was never restored.  Brothers went on with their lives continuing in their denial, betrayal.  Speaking with mother before her death, and seeking consolance from sisters was met with denial, rejection, and saying, get over it, let it go, telling me, "youre paranoid", and that speaking about this would push them away (guess what, you can leave cause I am not shutting up)  This destroyed me and my hope of and trust in and for any good relationships though I have tried to let it all go and life being difficult in and of iteself always have felt like I was "drowning" to survive (know this has to do with the fact none of what occurred against me was ever dealt with).  Knowing what is ideal as relationships has been shaded by these learned, taught lessons of abuse, total disregard, hatred of me and to this day the pain in my heart wells in tears like a permanent scar.  Was not able to protect myself, nor did I have anyone to protect me.
 
Replied By: marisaa92 on Mar 21, 2016, 7:08PM
When I was about 3 years old my mom and dad got a divorce. They were young parents and it just didn't work. The fact that my parents weren't together never affected my life. I saw and still see my dad often enough. After there separation they both moved on. You need to know my mom is not the healthiest person. She had a relationship with a man for about 8 years. He wasn't my favorite person on the world. My little brother (same mom and dad) had a nick name for him, my little dad, I called him by his name. I have one dad and love him to dad. Nobody else will get his place. So when they split up I didn't really had any feelings about it. It only made me hate him more because he kicked us out because of my moms illness. I love my mom and brother and I was fine by the idea to life with just the 3 of us. But that was not the way it would go. My mom was in love. So quickly after the break up we moved to his house. He had a daughter and she was 2 years at the time. Her mom couldn't take care of her so she lived full time in his house. The first year was fine and they got married very quickly. He was good for her, he took care of her. After that day everything changed. He didn't started to fight with my mom. He just needed a sitter for his daughter so he married my mom, now he had a sitter that was there 24/7. Only she still had love goggles on so didn't see that at the time. I was now 11 and my body started to change. More than ones he toughed my boobs and told me the were growing. He bought me night cloths, the sexy kind, as a present. My mom didn't knew. And I was to afraid to tell her. One day my mom brought my brother and step sister to school. I was sick and stayed at home. Like always I got out my bed and lied down in hers to watch TV. I though my mom's husband went to work but he was home. He stayed at home because he was sick. I wanted to step out of the bed but he told me I could stay and watch the show. So I did. I was 11 I didn't know I was at risk. He closed the door and laid down next to me. He hugged me. And then pinned me down. I was completely frozen. Couldn't move a muscle. The first time he pulled my pyama s down I tried to pull them up again. The second time I was to afraid. He began to toughed me. And pulled me closer by the second. And I was saved at the last moment. My mom had called her friend to go to my house. I was alone with him and she would be longer away from home then she tought. When he heard the door he lied back next to me. I still couldn't move. He pulled the covers over me and he waited. When she called him, he just responded. We are in bed watching tv. She came to look in the bedroom and said she was going to make some thea. That was my the voice my body needed. And when she left the room I stepped out of the bed. He asked me: are you sure you don't want more. I never replied, I just left. 




One year later my mom left him. I didn't tell her anything but she was afraid and wanted to leave him before he did something. Her best friend also talked to her. He saved me. Maybe a little bit to late for everything but if we stayed I think I would have killed myself. And he still saves me. He takes care of my mom. He is a man. A man that would die for his family. He lloves my mom, my mother and me and works his butt of to take the pain away and make a future for us that we need.



5 years later I told my mom. And she cried and now 10 years later she still cries if she thinks about it. I never reported it. My mom did but the police needed my to confirm. And I was to afraid. But the day his daughter called me in tears and told me he broke her ribs and arm because she was 20 minutes late. I wrote everything down and told her I had away to save her. To protect her and that I would do everything for her.


I had felt same for 15 years. I was afraid that people would judge me, wouldn't be friends any more, would treat me different of feel sorry for me. But the day everything came out with the story so many people said I was strong. But I learned one thing. I'm not the one you have to feel sorry for. It is never to late to tell your story. And people will believe the truth. 




I'm a Dutch girl so I did my best to tell the story in English.
 
Replied By: ksmith81 on Mar 2, 2016, 8:14AM - In reply to larared31
What did you do hon?
 
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