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Pre-Teens/Teens
September 18, 2008
With more and more children accessing the internet, safety is a key issue. What should you be aware of and how do you keep your own kids safe online? Share your tips and advice here.
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Replied By: thewid on Apr 27, 2009, 8:45PM
There are several MMORPGs (massively multiplayer online role playing game) available in the App Store for these two devices. These applications allow your child to converse with complete strangers from around the world. As a mother who has played these games I am appalled at the behavior exhibited by some users. Currently my greatest concern is in the application Girl Wars. This app seems to be a playground for teenage cybersex. Of course that makes the assumption there is not a pedophile problem as well.
PLEASE check your childs device for these applications...
iMob Online
iVampires Online
Girl Wars
iKnights
I've complained to Apple and the developers and it is obvious they have no intention of using an EXPLICIT tag on these games. In fact, Girl Wars is marketed for users age 4+.
PLEASE check your childs device for these applications...
iMob Online
iVampires Online
Girl Wars
iKnights
I've complained to Apple and the developers and it is obvious they have no intention of using an EXPLICIT tag on these games. In fact, Girl Wars is marketed for users age 4+.
Replied By: kpritchard2 on Apr 9, 2009, 10:54AM
TEENS - LYING? Why??
I don't mean little white lies, I mean, big, horrible, hurting innocent people's lives lies?
I was a single parent for 11 years, raised 2 children mostly on my own. We were very very close... I had them in every activity, every sport, I volunteered in everything for them, I was Brownie leader, team mom, AYSO registrar, went to every open house, every parent-teacher conference... you name it, I did it. I was totally dedicated to being a perfect mom -probably overcompensated since their dad wasn't a part of their lives.
My daughter turned 14, we moved from CA to CO, she was very busy with friends, being in school band, etc Again, she's VERY VERY SMART !! She told me to 'get a life" so I did. I met a man through church, got married... thought everything was good.
THEN it happened. She began telling people I was hurting her - physically hurting her. They did a social worker report, my daughter recanted. Said it was a big mistake. THEN again, she lied, and said my husband was molesting her. Had police involved, etc. She recanted AGAIN. THEN she said it was Three boys, drug dealers, kidnapped her, raped her and gave her drugs. Police were called... she sorta backed away again.
Had her in counseling, she said she wanted attention. What I didn't know was she was still lying.
WHY - she had everything, anything she wanted, she got, we had a very boring life... went to church together, ate dinner - EVERY NIGHT together... she seemed happy - got good grades - VERY VERY SMART.
THEN it happened AGAIN. A few weeks ago we get a call from the police... she's reported it again. They pretty much knwo at this time she's lying. But, in order to protect her and me and my husband they move her to her dad's.
Found on her email that she’s been having online SEX with a ADULT MARRIED man… and same emails with WOMEN!
WHY DO TEENS LIE? WHY?? Does this mean that something mentally is wrong? Is it the thrill?
We were all happy... or so it seemed!!
I don’t know her – WHO IS SHE?!?!
I don't mean little white lies, I mean, big, horrible, hurting innocent people's lives lies?
I was a single parent for 11 years, raised 2 children mostly on my own. We were very very close... I had them in every activity, every sport, I volunteered in everything for them, I was Brownie leader, team mom, AYSO registrar, went to every open house, every parent-teacher conference... you name it, I did it. I was totally dedicated to being a perfect mom -probably overcompensated since their dad wasn't a part of their lives.
My daughter turned 14, we moved from CA to CO, she was very busy with friends, being in school band, etc Again, she's VERY VERY SMART !! She told me to 'get a life" so I did. I met a man through church, got married... thought everything was good.
THEN it happened. She began telling people I was hurting her - physically hurting her. They did a social worker report, my daughter recanted. Said it was a big mistake. THEN again, she lied, and said my husband was molesting her. Had police involved, etc. She recanted AGAIN. THEN she said it was Three boys, drug dealers, kidnapped her, raped her and gave her drugs. Police were called... she sorta backed away again.
Had her in counseling, she said she wanted attention. What I didn't know was she was still lying.
WHY - she had everything, anything she wanted, she got, we had a very boring life... went to church together, ate dinner - EVERY NIGHT together... she seemed happy - got good grades - VERY VERY SMART.
THEN it happened AGAIN. A few weeks ago we get a call from the police... she's reported it again. They pretty much knwo at this time she's lying. But, in order to protect her and me and my husband they move her to her dad's.
Found on her email that she’s been having online SEX with a ADULT MARRIED man… and same emails with WOMEN!
WHY DO TEENS LIE? WHY?? Does this mean that something mentally is wrong? Is it the thrill?
We were all happy... or so it seemed!!
I don’t know her – WHO IS SHE?!?!
Replied By: jrmass on Apr 4, 2009, 8:19PM
Well, what I would recommend is that we have some software which prevents teens and kids from accessing the majority of websites but allows them only on kids' websites which are protected from predators. I don't know if such software exists, but it would be definitely a good idea to design.
I think that teenagers sometimes seek trouble and they are looking for sex partners on the internet so if you don't trust your teen then don't allow them to use the internet unless you have another computer connected where you can see exactly what they are doing, sort of like an echoing on the screen of all the webpages your kid's accessing. You could probably do this without your kid knowing so you can track their behaviour from another part of your home. This is a very interesting research project in computers, so if Dr. Phil has the people to work on it, I'd be willing to share my ideas with them, as I am a computer engineer. who has designed software in the past.
I think that teenagers sometimes seek trouble and they are looking for sex partners on the internet so if you don't trust your teen then don't allow them to use the internet unless you have another computer connected where you can see exactly what they are doing, sort of like an echoing on the screen of all the webpages your kid's accessing. You could probably do this without your kid knowing so you can track their behaviour from another part of your home. This is a very interesting research project in computers, so if Dr. Phil has the people to work on it, I'd be willing to share my ideas with them, as I am a computer engineer. who has designed software in the past.
Replied By: hpmx59 on Feb 3, 2009, 5:48PM
Doctor Phil Show. I think predator sure stay away from teenager also I think that teenager sure not allow
eo use cell phone at all unless they got permission from their parents. Sincerleu Your. Russell Vlaand-
eren.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
eo use cell phone at all unless they got permission from their parents. Sincerleu Your. Russell Vlaand-
eren.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Replied By: leosden40 on Feb 3, 2009, 2:40PM
Let me preface this by saying I have worked with computers for nearly 30 years now. But even if I did not, I would conrtol my childs content. I learned how to work the router (device all the computers in your house talk to). I have learned how to get the web page history so I can see where my children have been - even if they "delete" them.
On top of all this, we have an open and honest dialog. They are told the difference between right nad wrong and told the above - they need to know how I can and do check on them.
My oldest was just allowed on FaceBook. however all emails go to my wife. We approve all friends she has access to and not her.
Bottom line is we parent our kids and we are in charge until they are 18 and then pray they retain the good things!
On top of all this, we have an open and honest dialog. They are told the difference between right nad wrong and told the above - they need to know how I can and do check on them.
My oldest was just allowed on FaceBook. however all emails go to my wife. We approve all friends she has access to and not her.
Bottom line is we parent our kids and we are in charge until they are 18 and then pray they retain the good things!
Replied By: rwsocwkr on Nov 1, 2008, 7:16PM
I have worked in schools for 11 years now of my 38 years in social work (all with kids and families). Bullying is clearly a problem. We are doing bullying prevention education, using programs that have the research data to support their being effective; if they are being effective it is difficult for me to see it. One of my districts is doing character education, that is, teaching honesty, trust, respect, responsibility,... Do we see the problem here? Kids come to school at about age 5/6. Why are schools having to teach these values and not parents??? Should they not have this well ingrained by parental role-modeling as well as family discussion BEFORE we get them??
Parents are bullying teachers, principals, school boards. We have a problem here way beyond the need for teaching in school. Schools were teaching reading, writing and math....but now we are addressing, bullying, peer mediation, character education, drug and alcohol prevention , and huge behavior and mental health issues and referrals for treatment. These are extremely time and finance consuming. Programs require finances and that requires taxes, either from a Federal level, state or local.
First thing we have to do, somehow, is help kids unlearn 5/6 years worth of learning, that continues to be ongoing while the kid attends school. Everybody looks at schools first to fix these problems. What can we do to teach parenting to kids in school, to support families, many who do not want it.
Parenting is so difficult, but it is one of the few "professions" where having a child makes the parent an expert. Few of those I have met want outside intervention, help. Is it too late, for many, by the time the kids get to school?
It ia a big problem, with no easy answer.
Rich, LSW
Parents are bullying teachers, principals, school boards. We have a problem here way beyond the need for teaching in school. Schools were teaching reading, writing and math....but now we are addressing, bullying, peer mediation, character education, drug and alcohol prevention , and huge behavior and mental health issues and referrals for treatment. These are extremely time and finance consuming. Programs require finances and that requires taxes, either from a Federal level, state or local.
First thing we have to do, somehow, is help kids unlearn 5/6 years worth of learning, that continues to be ongoing while the kid attends school. Everybody looks at schools first to fix these problems. What can we do to teach parenting to kids in school, to support families, many who do not want it.
Parenting is so difficult, but it is one of the few "professions" where having a child makes the parent an expert. Few of those I have met want outside intervention, help. Is it too late, for many, by the time the kids get to school?
It ia a big problem, with no easy answer.
Rich, LSW
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