I have a young brother who will turn 30 this year. He has a herion problem, he is addicted. He said he has been using for 3 years but I know he has used other drugs in the past. Where can I get him help at. I know there are links on here but I'm a stay at home mom of 3 where do I find extra money to send him to rehab when I can barely make ends meet. I've already lost two cousins to drugs I don't want to lose my brother too.

i have 2 sons to. both worked their way, to become herion addicts. i had them arrested. i tried the tough love approach. i put them in rehabs, before they became 18. then i had them put in rehabs, with my money. my insurance company, only helped alittle, then when they became 18, they did nothing. i paid for everything. when they were in jail, i was happy, they would call everyday, crying to come home. they did try hard, to stop, but its a disease, it fried their brains. the only way to help them is to not give up on them. try to find places on the computer, that dr phil would send, his addicts. i tried dr phil, and every person, that i could think of. i didn't have a computer, back then. reserch everything, don't give up the fight. you are in a war, i know how u feel. the pain, of having your kids, being drug addicts is very hurtfull. you cry, you hurt, you worry. you have to fight everyday, fight to find the rehabs that r out there. even if u have to committ them. even tho they r adults, find a way to force them, into a rehab. call your police dept, find the help on a computer. money ? you have to lose everything, to save them. don't stop doing the work needed to find a way to save them. its a disease. i found out the hard way. my albert died jan 24th 2010, age 30, overdose. my anthony died feb 24th, age 22, of a overdose. herion killed them. i die to, 2010. they died in my arms. don't forget what i am writing here. fight, and win. then let me know i helped u. i don't want u in the pain, i am in. its worse now, then when we had the battles of herion addicts.

i will try to help u. i feel everything u r talking about, the anger, frustration, the pain of not knowing what to do. i will start out, telling u, not to b afraid of what u say, to your family and friends. don't b ashamed. be strong, alot of people r addicted to drugs. tell them the truth, and maybe your family and friends, could help u. i never told anyone, that my albert was a addict, then my younger son, anthony, became a addict. i did everything i could think of to save them. both of my sons brain, was fried. its a terrible disease, that society doesn't care about, because its their choice. but they become addicts, because of our lives. there is so much stress. in my sons case, they started marijuana, very young, when my mom was murdered. the jouney with 2 addicts was hell. in and out of rehabs. many addicts i spoke to, were about to b released from rehab. only to tell me that this addict was afraid to go home. wife, kids, bills, etc...drugs make them escape from this world. the first thing i will tell u, is even tho she is an adult, find her, and stand by her. committ her, arrest her, i had my boys arrested many times. don't stop there, look and find rehabs, that dr phil sends his addicts to. they r expensive, but find money no matter what. secure her, hold onto her. i wish i could do the same 4 my sons. albert died jan 24th, 2010 of a herion overdose, age 30. anthony died feb 24th, 2010, age 22. i died the same day. i wish i was u. i wish i had a second chance. find her, hold her.

my sons told me, later in life, that albert started with marijuana, after my mom was murdered. she was shot to death, her body burned, and the house burned down, in phila. march 2nd , 1995. it took 2 years, for the trial to come. 31 days in court, and he was found guilty. he was her boyfriend of many years. he got life, and died in prison, oct 28th, 2012. i did not see the problem, that my kids saw. the stress was to much, they loved my mom, very much. anthony, had her name on his arm, he loved her so much.
both started with marijuana, and now states are making it legal. they went from marijuana, to herion. at the time, i tried everything, to help them. i wrote to dr phil, i found out, the places he uses for rehabs, r very expensive. i called other rehabs, and they also were expensive. they did not take insurance. i did not have a computer back in the beginning. so i could not find other rehabs. one time, he was arrested for selling estacy. i paid alot of money to keep him out of jail, he recieved 10 years, the judge suspended 9 years, so he had to serve 1 year. while in prison, his girlfriend, mother of his child, had a baby sitter,male, who raped her. before he raped her, my grandson, 7 years old, tried to fight him, using a plastic sword. he put my grandson in his bedroom. while his mom screamed. later, he was arrested for rape. he was about to go to court, because he said it was consental. but a neighbor, heard screams, and he plead guilty. he recieved 10 years no parole. as u can see, i don't have much strengh for life, i miss my boys very much. what i would do now, i would take them to a island, and live, because every where i moved to, a neighbor did drugs, no matter where. i would like to help others. parents, if u need me, i would b there. in the year, 2010, 38,239 people died of overdose. i died to, in the year, 2010. " i am not living, i am dieing"l

Albert, my heart goes out to you. No parent ever wants to go through what you've gone through. I have been painfully close to that situation with my own son mutiple times. Fortunately he survived, but not without permanent harm to his brain and his body. My son will never be like he was prior to drugs. We are still dealing with the situation and I understand  your frustration with obtaining help. We live in a rural Oklahoma community where services are not abundant. Having an addict in the family can rapidly deplete a family's resources. We have encountered all of the situations you described. I know because my son was a meth addict. He became involved in drugs in his early teens. Adults, one with a business across the street from the high school, were actually using vulnerable teens as mules and dealers. Our family has  been subjected to all of the typical things families of addicts encounter. I know how powerless and desperate family members fell in such situations. Some of my friends have lost their children to drugs. That is a pain that never goes away. It is evident just from the posts on this subject that addiction is a pervasive problem in our society and that our society is ill prepared to deal with the situation. I am so sorry about the loss of your sons and the pain that you have all experienced. This is a very sad situation and although it may feel like it a lot of the time you are definitely not alone.

my name is albert, i am 57 years old. when my son albert, started doing drugs, he was 15 years old. by the time he was 18, he was still doing drugs. i tried everything i could think of ,to help him. he was arrested many times, and nobody out there would help me. my insurance company, didn't want to do more for him. when he went to a rehab, they only paid so much. i paid, for him to go. when he was an adult, i had to pay out of pocket, as he didn't work, he was arrested again over and over. he couldn't have a job, because he was a convicted felon. i paid for his bail, and warrants. courts would not help me, all they said was " good luck" as he got older, we had another son, 7 years younger then him, we named him anthony.   i had a new problem, anthony started doing marijuana, same as my albert. from there it was every drug you can find. they did it. they told me one day " that they were drug addicts" i could not help them. i ran out of money but not out of love. as time went by, i lost everything, money, nerves, worries, , we had fights, we were in a terrible battle. i was all alone. frienda family, courts, would not help me. cops, all they wanted wasa an arrest. jail. on jan 24th 2010, albert, 30 years old, died of a overdose. anthony, on feb 24th, 2010, died of a overdose. age 22.         what i would do, now, 2013, i would die for them. find help somewhere.

Dr. Phil, 


I watched today's show and totally related to the bewilderment these mother's have felt in dealing with their son's heroin addictions.

My husband and I took our son to drug court. We repeatedly brought him to the hospital because he called and said he wanted to hurt himself. He quit heroin but went on Methadone. He went into community housing for 3 months after a 6 month court-ordered rehab. He came to live with us.

In July 2010 my son beat the hell out off me in my home. He currently is cut off from the methadone clinic cause he shows up high. His damn doctor is also giving him Benzo's that he misuses. My heart went out to those mom's today. Please have someone call me so I can talk about how I tried to get him into origins. Our family and myself is in such a discourse in life it is pathetic.

I'm sorry about your brother and since your only 13 that's such a hard thing to worry about day in and day out I know he is on your mind. I may not be much help , but My son sounds so much like your brother only he hasn't admitted to doing anything yet , he too is in his twenties and his life is falling apart around him but I'm trying to be brave enough to let him destroy his life because that may be the only thing that will bring him around to wanting to help himself,,,,,,, I do know how painful it is to watch someone you love so much hurt themselves over and over again but if you stay healthy and happy yourself at least there will be someone to encourage him and brighten his days when he decides to change his life ,,, take care of yourself and learn from his mistakes...

I am hoping that their are people like myself out there that is in the same boat. I've been in a 20yr relationship with 4 children 18yrs to 13months. I tried to hang onto something that I only hoped for. I was the person that let the drug abuse go on either denial, or the person that is condoning it. Years pass and things got worser.  I just recently let go since September 2012 because I just could not do it no more. I had 2 heart attacks and basicly a struggling single mom. My question to all is.  SHOULD I GO AND GET HIM OFF OF THE STREETS AND SEEK HELP FOR HIM SINCE HIS MIND IS FRIED FROM CONITIOUS USE OF DRUG OR SHOULD I JUST KEEP HIM ON THE BACK BURNER AND NOT LOOK BACK?  It is so hard right now cause part of me do miss him and the other part is telling me that I am asking for trouble. I also feel that I am the only one to help him right now. He has no one to help or run to.. What should I do? I undrstand that there are different oppionions and I am open to all. Please help!  Thanks!  Tammie

I am in a similar situation, except I have a 4 year old child with mine. He has verbally and sexually abused me since I was pregnant. Although he tried to quit drinking several times, he bnever sought help, even when I begged him. I just left almost 3 weeks ago with our son, and it still did nothing. 


PLEASE believe me when I say you CANNOT HELP HIM UNLESS HE WANTS THE HELP. He will never change, and the abuse will continue and get worse, and you will lose yourself in the process.

Alcoholics are the most selfish, manipulative people in the world, and he will not stop until he has destroyed you as much as he has destroyed himself. So leave, leave, leave!  It will suck at first (I am 41 and had to give up my cat and move in with my parents, along with my son). It may not get him to get help (didn't work for me, and like him, his mother blames me for everything. She herself is an alcoholic). But DO IT FOR YOURSELF. Also, look into AlAnon. It helps a lot.


I wish I could give you more hopeful words, but I need to be honest with you. Please take care of yourself. Only he can do the same for himself.