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Are you or is someone you love addicted to something unhealthy? Whether it's food, alcohol, drugs, painkillers, sex, pornography, or something else, find support here.

If you believe you need immediate assistance, please call your local emergency number or crisis hotline listed in your local phone book's government pages.

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Replied By: veesimi on Sep 2, 2014, 6:02PM
I live with my boyfriend of 11 years. A year and a half ago, we took in his 26 year old son, who is a Heroin addict, to get him help. Since the son landed on our doorstep, it has been nothing but a hellish tornado!! The son got on Methadone, and that was about it. No counseling, no treatment, NOTHING! He has financially ruined us, we had to leave our home and move to the other side of town, and his father brought him with us. The son has his own room, sleeps ALL day sometimes until 6 pm, he curses his father out, vicious ugly verbal fights daily,and attacks me verbally even though I don't speak to him and try to stay out of his way.

The father has found needles inhis room, KNOWS FOR A FACT that the son is shooting up in our house and does NOTHING about it! He yells at him once a week to get a job and move out, and ten minutes later they are pals and hanging out together. Does not ever folloow through on anything he "threatens " his son with. IT IS COMPLETE LUNACY!!

The son was in the hospital with liver failure 6 months ago almost dead, and now he is using in our home and dad looks the other way!!

The son has it in his drug fogged head that I am the cause of all his lives' problems. He has been acting irrational, delusional, paranoid, and I fear being left alone in the house with him. I tell the father this, but he said his son would NEVER hurt me,no matter how much he hates me.

Everytime I try to the dad about treament, and putting his foot down he tells me to "stay out of it" ...yes, even though I have been living with it for almost 2 years.

I guess the boy will die with Dad looking the other way, andGrandma sending him $$$ that she knows, but doesn't want to admit, is going for dope.

I am trying to find a way to leave this house, but it is quite hard with no finances. These 2 are living in some bizzare world of co-dependency and enabling and master manupilation and emotional blackmail from the son, and it is making me physically and emnotionally ill.

I guess all I can do is hand it over to God. I am so worn out!

If anyone has any suggestions, I would appreciate it, but I think i have done all I can do, since I am not allowed to get involved.
Replied By: robmican on Sep 2, 2014, 9:57AM
Dr. Phil, I wrote to you a while back asking for your help with my 25 yr old who was addicted to heroin and crack cocaine as well as prescription meds too. The picture I've attached is one I used for her obituary. On her 26th birthday she was put into a drug induced coma to detox her in order to help her fight several infections running ramped through her body as a result of not cleaning her injection site for heroin. She fought for over a month and a half only to be sent home with hospice to die in my arms surrounded by her family two days later. This madness of drug addicted teens needs to stop I want your help to share our story in hopes to prevent this from happening to any other parents. Thank you Dr. Phil for all you do.
Replied By: jlarch on Aug 28, 2014, 6:36PM - In reply to trauma_nurse
Have tried to get my adult son to go to see a doctor who gives vivitrol injections, but he will not consider it.   He is very depressed and just not sure which came first....alcoholism or depression.  Do you have any advice about how to convince him to get help?  
Replied By: sdm143 on Aug 14, 2014, 3:24AM
hi everyone my boyfriend has been addicted to meth for 3yrs he says he can quit at any time but yet he has yet to be sober longer then a month he has blammed me in saying its not my fault he chooses to do it but when i piss him off he says screw it and goes an gets high he spends most of our money on it and all tho there have been several times i know he has it i dont say anything any more cuz iam fed up and just dont care anymore i have told him to get help and i have said i will be there by his side but for what ever reson me saything that in the past was not good enough he thinks i should still be supporting him in some way i dont know if ignoring him and the  addiction all together is right but i cant find it in my self to feel compastion.
Replied By: trauma_nurse on Aug 12, 2014, 5:01PM - In reply to shelly2642
It does not work if you are not committed to quitting, but it sounds like you are.  There is a medication that is statistically more helpful than even treatment called naltrexone.  You should not take it until you have been sober a week as it is a receptor blocker that could throw you into withdrawl depending on the frequency and severity of your drinking.  It does not work for everyone but for those it does help it is a miracle, but generally not as sole therapy.  You need support, and a way of healing, as most people drink for a reason.  After your body is sober your mind may still be wounded or have poor coping skills.  AA is the most widely available program but there are also support groups at churches and other places.  Hearing how others coped and suceeded will help as will accountability and not feeling alone.  The medication with a support group is a formidable one two punch for those who really wish to find a btter path.

Replied By: trauma_nurse on Aug 12, 2014, 4:49PM - In reply to motherruby
Some things you will learn if you stick around: 1. You are not alone, and supportive people can help you survive and make the right choices to support not prolong your son's recovery.  2. ANYTHING you do to help by way of a place to live, money, or other assistance while he is still drinking will prolong his recovery.  Most addicts do not seek help without consequences and pain.  3. He is an adult, pressure and cajoling are unlikely to work if he has not hit bottom. 4. Alcoholism is a family disease, you may not have caused it but you can enable and contribute to it, and it can ruin the lives of those he loves if the FAMILY does not get help.  I wish you all good things and you are in my prayers.

Replied By: motherruby on Aug 11, 2014, 5:43PM
This show about the Survivor person named Todd is so painful for me to watch.  My adult son didn't start drinking until he was older. Now he drinks all weekend, beginning before he gets up in the morning. He goes through cases of beer and bottles of alcohol each weekend. He spends the weekend drinking and sleeping. He currently lives on his own and has a good job. He doesn't drink before work, but drinks every night in addition to the weekends.

have taken him to AA as part of a deal when he needed my help with his living situation, but as soon as he didn't need my help he stopped going to the meetings with me. Since he's an adult, living on his own, I have no idea how to help him. I don't know if I just  love him and hope for the best, or keep talking to him about his drinking. I'm the only one in the family who has talked to him about his drinking even though everyone has concerns about it. At one AA meeting several of the people told me there was nothing I could say or do to persuade him to get help; that it has to come from him. I've attended Al-Anon but it's not prescriptive. It is more of a support group, which is great, but it doesn't tell you what to do or how to help.

I just don't know what I can do. There's no Dr. Phil Show to provide the magical answer. If only there was a book or a program to tell me what to do. My son won't even admit it's a problem.

Replied By: shelly2642 on Aug 9, 2014, 1:57PM - In reply to raznoff2012
I am right along with you.  I binge drink. I am 32 and been doing this for years. I get major anxiety, so I think covering it up with alcohol with make it all better. Well it don't! I am in the closest because I don't want to hurt anymore and I am very ashamed. Last week I drank 3 days straight (vodka) and the 4th day I was so sick. today is my 3rd day with out alcohol and red bull (another addiction I have). I wish us both a long and happy life.
Replied By: bbmichelle on Aug 7, 2014, 7:14PM
I am so proud of myself I had to share. I have quit smoking and didnt need any meds or program or anything!i just decided and through discipline have acheived!

Replied By: josieabc on Aug 5, 2014, 3:58PM
I am "legally" disabled and have no choice but to take pain meds. I take them responsibly. I take only enough so that I can function at a basic level. I am still in extreme pain. I cant care for myself due to the amount of pain I am still in but taking more pain meds is not beneficial either. That does not make me a drug addict ! 

If I could find better medical care and get my medical issues corrected than I would be thrilled to not need to take pain meds... I just wish that was possible! The insurance companies dont want to pay for the right treatments and the medical system does not care if you get fixed they only care about making money and having a steady stream of patients paying them every month!  It is the doctorsand the insurnace companies that create drug addicts... not the patient fault especially not the disabled persons fault.. nor are they all drug addicts! So yes, I am extremly offended that most medical people think everyone that is on pain meds is some kind of addict! Talk about discrimination! Being physically disabled does not make a person a drug addict!

The doctors and insurance companies that are pushing drugs instead of fixing the problems that could be fixed are the problem!

The system needs to be fixed so that it is beneficial for the insurance companies and the medical professionals to fix problems and not prolong them!
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