Depression and Grief

 

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Are you overwhelmed with dark feelings of despair? Have you suffered a loss and are having a difficult time coping? If you or someone you love is suffering from depression or is grief-stricken, you know it can be a struggle, but you don’t need to suffer in silence. Share your story here.

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Replied By: icareaboutpeop on Sep 11, 2016, 10:42PM
Important your other email was return as undeliverable at same listed email address. If all doesn't go through my blog or story is on Google home page Dave M. Inbox x Dave M. <dsm4857@gmail.com> 11:26 PM (6 minutes ago) to contactus Dave M. Trying to understand and live day to day. Sep 10, 2016 FENTANYL, PAIN PILLS IN GENERAL AND XANAX!

This is a subject that hits close to home for me and millions of others. I am tired of hearing about kids, adults and even famous people dying from pain pills, especially now Fentenyl and Xanax.

To begin with these are very much needed medicines. Used for everything from having a tooth pulled, root canal surgery, being in a car accident that was not even your fault but having broken bones and surgery, chronic pain to end-stage cancer and everything in between. Most if not all the person(s) involved never asked to have any of these especially especially cancer and chronic pain..

Pain pills are needed and very much so. WHAT ABOUT PEOPLE WITH CANCER AND CHRONIC PAIN ARE THEY JUST SUPPOSED TO SUFFER? I AM SURE EVERYONE FROM THEMSELVES TO THEIR LOVED ONES. THEY HAVE SEEN IN OR FELT THE AGONIZING PAIN AND SOMETIMES THESE PEOPLE EVEN WITH PAIN MEDICATION ARE HURTING UNTIL THE DOSAGE GETS RIGHT FOR THEM. DO YOU REALLY WANT TO SUFFER OR HAVE A LOVED ONE OR FRIEND GO THROUGH HELL WHEN THERE WAS PAIN MEDICATION ON THE MARKET THAT WOULD HELP AND DOCTORS PRESCRIBING THE MEDICATION NOT FOR MONEY BUT BECAUSE THEY CARE ABOUT PEOPLE AND VALUED THEIR OATH? A LOT OF DOCTORS WORKED HARD TO BECOME A DOCTOR NOT FOR A "WHITE COAT" OR THE MONEY(many have loans that will take years to pay off) NOR TO DRIVE A FANCY CAR OR LIVE IN A BIG HOUSE! BUT SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY LOVED PEOPLE AND WANTED TO TRY AND CURE THEM OR AT LEAST MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER.

Ever see a couple married for many years lets say 50 or more? Then one or the other gets sick and died then the other died from a broken heart within days or weeks. Or a husband or wife gets sick and they can't stand to see the other suffer and kill the them then themselves. Did you know on a fixed income that couldn't afford the pain medication or find a doctor brave enough to write a prescription for pain medication due to these shows making the doctor so afraid of the DEA. I actually have seen a doctor cry trying to decide if the risk of losing their hard earned license to practice medicine and helping others out weighs the writing for the pain medication. This is how bad these shows, stories and parents in denial going after everyone not thinking of those who need it is having such an effect on so many good decent people. I have seen a loved on suffering and it hurts to the core.

THEY RISK CATCHING WITH THE PATIENT MIGHT HAVE LIKE "ZIKA" AND OTHER VIRUS INCLUDING AIDS BY NOT EVEN WEARING A FACE MASK AS IT MIGHT SCARE THE PATIENT WHO IN MOST CASES IS ALREADY SCARED AND WORRIED.

They call it "Practicing Medicine" as it is NOT an exact science, not all is known but they try with every ounce of their being to make "breakthrough" to save lives and help the suffering. The doctors are reading up and learning of new findings everyday mostly when were home with a beer watching TV. Other doctors have dedicated their lives to finding "breakthroughs" in medicine like they have in genes for breast cancer and other cancers, Polio and a long list of other illnesses including AIDS. Most working now hard on this "ZEKA " virus which was brought to the US by Haitian pregnant women. Many other doctors work endless hours for little pay because they care. Then pass the information to your regular doctor so he or she can apply what they have just learned to help their patients. This goes on EVERYDAY OF EVERY YEARS GOING BACK MANY, MANY, MANY YEARS.

I would just like to touch on this "ZIKA" virus which really has nothing to do with this main story. I am NOT a doctor or expert in any way concerning medicine. When I wrote about "ZIKA" when it first came to light the beginning of August 2016. I believed it was the Aug. 3, 2016 blog. The "experts" said it was a "small area in Wynwood Miami, Fl. Dade County ". That is was "contained" and could only be caught by being pregnant women from these third world countries and "nothing for anyone to worry about for anyone else even already pregnant women in the area".

I using research and common sense said to be careful this is just the beginning and will spread and I felt would not only affect other pregnant women but men and women who were NOT pregnant. I was sent emails and reviews from these expects saying "I didn't know what I was talking about and it's contained and over" and "I was causing a panic over something very minor" just to name a few remarks I received.

IN THE PAST 6 WEEKS WEEKS THE "ZEKA" VIRUS HAS SPREAD ALL OVER THE STATE EVEN AFFECTING A TEEN BOY IN TAMPA AND A MAN IN WEST PALM BEACH. NEITHER LEFT THE COUNTRY OR AREA, TRAVELED TO WYNWOOD MIAMI INTO THE "ZONE" OR KNEW ANY PREGNANT WOMEN WHO HAD IT. THE "EXPERTS" HAVE NOW FOUND "ZEKA" IN LOCAL NON PREGNANT WOMEN, MEN , BOYS WHICH THEY NOW SAY CAN CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE IN THESE MALES AND WOMEN NOT PREGNANT. A "ZIKA ZONE" WAS FOUND IN MIAMI BEACH THAT TOOK CARE OF THE TOURISTS. WITH HOTELS REPORTING OVER A 90% CANCELLATION RATE. AND NOW "ZEKA" IS MOVING TOWARDS OTHER STATES WITH NO CURE IN SIGHT.

OUR GOVERNOR ORDERED ALL PREGNANT WOMEN TO LEAVE MIAMI DADE COUNTY AS IF THE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF THESE WOMEN SOME ILLEGAL HAD ANY PLACE TO GO. BUT SOME DID GO TO THE NEXT COUNTY BROWARD(FT. LAUDERDALE). SO WE NOW HAVE "ZEKA" ALL OVER AND THE BILLION DOLLAR TOURIST AREA MIAMI BEACH IS ALMOST DEAD, WOMEN, MEN AND EVERYONE SCARED AND CATCHING IT DAILY AS NEW CASES ARE REPORTED EVERYDAY ALL OVER THE STATE. PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE BEEN IN ANOTHER COUNTRY TO CATCH IT AND ALL OF THIS I MENTIONED EARLY ON IN MY ONE BLOG ON "ZIKA".

So with no cure in sight, the virus moving quickly out of Florida to other states. And even the Bahamas a big resort area are stopping these pregnant women from coming into their country and I am sure other areas will follow them and not allow anyone from Florida along with males and women some not pregnant to enter their country till this "epidemic" is over if ever? SO NOW THE "EXPERTS" ARE SPRAYING BY PLANE TO TRY AND KILL GROUND BASED MOSQUITOES THAT DID NOT WORK IN WYNWOOD MIAMI "GROUND ZERO" FOR THIS VIRUS AT ALL. THEY ARE SPAYING A TYPE OF POISON THAT IS BANNED IN MANY COUNTRIES DUE TO HEALTH HAZARDS AND SIDE EFFECTS. THERE ARE MANY RESIDENTS PROTESTING THIS SPRAYING AND THEY ARE IGNORED AS USUAL. THE TOURISTS HERE ALREADY JUST LEAVE EARLY AS THEY KNOW THE RISKS OF THIS POISON FROM THEIR COUNTRY THAT ALREADY HAVE BANNED IT'S USE. IT DOESN'T WORK AS WYWOOD AS SHOWN, THEY ARE SPRAYING IT ON ALL PEOPLE YOUNG AND OLD, HOMES, CARS AND THE LAKES, WATERWAYS AND OCEANS THAT MAKE UP MIAMI BEAUTIFUL BEACHES AND AREA. RESIDENTS, TOURISTS ARE NOW WEARING SURGICAL MASKS. PARENTS NOT ONLY HAVE THEIR CHILDREN IN MASKS BUT ARE KEEPING THEM AND THEMSELVES INSIDE AND OUT OF SCHOOL AND AWAY FROM THE THE BEACH. THE FACTS ARE CLEAR FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD HOW DANGEROUS THIS POISON IS. SO NOW I GUESS THANKS TO OUR GOVERNOR SAYING TO GET OUT OF MIAMI THEY REPORTED THAT SPRAYING IS TO BEGIN IN BROWARD COUNTY(FT. LAUDERDALE WHERE MANY FRUIT GROWING FARMS FOR ORANGES AND GRAPEFRUIT ARE IN BROWARD COUNTY THEN SPRAYING IN PALM BEACH COUNTY! AND AS THEY HAVE SHOWN IT DOESN'T MATTER IF IT WORKS OR NOT AND IF IT'S WHAT THE RESIDENT TAX PAYERS WANT WHICH THEY DON'T A DANGEROUS POISON SPRAYED ON THEM, THEIR FAMILIES, HOMES AND BEACHES! THEY ARE GOING AHEAD WITH THE SPRAYING. NO ONE CAN EVEN SAY HOW LONG THE POISON LASTS.

And I did write this was going to happen just not the poison spaying at the time of the blog just using research and common sense that our officials don't seem to have.. These women keep coming when there is no cure. How they get in the U.S. with this virus legally is beyond me. But being the babies with or without "Zika" are born in the U.S. making them automatic U.S. citizens. So they are allowed to stay in the U.S. and out of sympathy they then let the mother stay. They even have a name for this "Anchor babies". Then in almost every case illegal or not the husband and other kids get over here and then hide. Using the precious few resources for the medical. hungry, homeless(especially Vets.), Food stamps, Welfare, SNAP, WICA, Section 8 housing using up what was for the poor, homeless families and others. All U.S. citizens who most paid taxes at one time or another. I am NOT heartless just being real.

With all the items collected for the starving and dying babies in countries like Haiti and Africa along with church groups like the famous Duggar family(19 and counting" TV show and books they wrote which now when everything came to light and the parents knew about the eldest son's crimes years ago and hid them to keep on TV and the money are a joke. Even when they were supposed to be on Oprah's show some years back they heard rumors which were true and cancelled them on the spot. And Oprah earned a lot of respect especially from me for standing by her morals. And in another interesting note the parents reported this to a friend who happened to be a State Police Officer all though no report was found or filled and they said he said "don't worry about it". He is now serving a 55 year prison sentence for having Child Porn and like many wonder who kids were on this porn Jim-Bob?) and their incest, moral less, wife cheating eldest son. Whose family claims to constantly visit to teach and bring supplies to these third world people and come back with pictures of the children in trash dumps looking for food, buildings full of hungry new born children, kids with bloated, empty stomachs and so on to tug at our heart strings. And these are also seen on commercial where only a small part of your donation gets to these kids the rest to actors and company leaders asking for the donations. WHY CAN'T AT LEAST SOME OF THESE CHURCH GROUPS OR DUGGARS TAKE A DAY TO TEACH THESE WOMEN AND MEN ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL, KEEPING THEIR LEGS CLOSED, THESE HUNGRY DYING KIDS ARE THEIRS AND IF YOU CAN'T CARE FOR THEM AND FEED THEM THEN STOP HAVING THEM?

Also just to show a little about the Duggar's and their wonderful TV family we watched for years growing up and hiding the truth that didn't suit them doing only good and not caring about the money from TV and books that they were meant according to Michelle the mother "to educate people" and the money never mattered. Nor I guess the cover-ups of incest, cheating, sexual activity while married with other married women including prositution by their older son the only one we know about when they said they used "Half Hugs". no kissing, girls always in skirts and those being long to keep from any sexual thoughts or feelings till the girls could "court" but still must have a chaperone even after getting engaged and still not a kiss till they were legally married! Then started to kick out babies like their mother and like with her even at 50 years old and the babies dying or being born sick or with other medical and physical problems good old Jim-Bob not Walton but the grown father kept trying to get Michelle pregnant. THE POINT TO THIS LAST PARAGRAPH IS OF COURSE A FEW YEARS AGO WHEN ALL THIS CAME TO LIGHT THE NETWORK AND LONG TIME SPONSERS HAVING MORALS CANCELLED THE SHOW RIGHT ON THE SPOT. HOWEVER, THEY HAVE SNEAKED BACK ON TV USING THE GIRLS NAMES ONLY JILL AND JESSA WHO ARE NOW MARRIED BUT SHOWING THE WHOLE FAMILY PARENTS INCLUDED CALLED "COUNTING ON" BUT NOT ON EARLY LIKE 19 AND COUNTING WAS AND OTHER FAMILY WHOLESOME SHOWS BUT 11 PM EST. AND INTERESTING THE ADVANCE ADS, COMMERCIALS FOR THE SHOW, ARTICLES IN TV GUIDE AND OTHER PAPERS AND MAGAZINES NEVER APPEARED JUST THE SHOW AND WHO IS THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER NONE OTHER BUT JIM BOB DUGGAR!

i WATCHED THE SHOW AND EVEN LIKE AND WATCH THE BATES WHOM SEEM LIKE A REAL DECENT FAMILY BUT ALSO WATCH NCIS, THE NEWS, CODE BLACK, CHICAGO HOPE, LAW & ORDER, DUCK DYNASTY AND MANY OTHER PROGRAMS.

I am going to add just a few more thoughts then I promise back to the pain pills. And I am sorry as I do tend to wonder off the main subject not being a professional writer, never taking a course in writing or very good in grammar and English in school. This blog only started because people I know said you do research, have the facts and care about right and wrong along with caring about people you don't even know. You make good choices and sense on issues why not share it with others do a blog which I knew nothing about? I also never took typing in school so sorry about typos, run on sentence and other mistakes. I also never took a lesson in writing a blog as back then no one knew what a blog was and with my accident and dad I have been too busy now.

I have kind of made it a point not to write about politics. But know it's hard not to write something especially as the main election gets closer. For the first time I can remember in my 50 plus years we have 2 opponents so bent on ripping the other. I HAVE NOT HEARD ONE THING ON THE ISSUES LIKE GLOBAL WARMING, TAXING THE RICH NOT THE POOR, PEOPLE HAVING TO WORK THREE JOBS TO PAY THE BILLS, HOMELESS FAMILIES, VETS AND OTHERS, THE HUNGRY AND POOR, ISIS PROBLEMS(AND THAT DOESN'T MEAN SAYING THE CURRENT PRESIDENT AND THEN SECRETARY OF STATE NOW HIS RUNNING OPPONENT FOUNDED ONE OF THE MOST MURDERING OF INNOCENT PEOPLE AND JUST PLAIN KILLINGS GROUPS ALL OVER THE WORLD ALONG WITH MAKING EVEN U.S. CITIZENS AND PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD SCARED AND ON CONSTANT EDGE( ONE REASON FOR XANAX). ONE REASON MANY ESPECIALLY AFTER NOT ONLY 9/11 WHICH HAPPENED YEARS AGO TODAY AND IS STILL FRESH IN OUR MINDS BUT DAILY HIJACKS AND BOMBINGS AROUND THE WORLD THAT STATEMENT WAS INCOMPETENT ENOUGH FOR SOME PEOPLE JUST WALKING AND TALKING BUT NOT FOR SOMEONE RUNNING TO LEAD THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH. BUT THEN YOU HAVE THE OTHER PERSON CLINTON LYING ABOUT EMAILS, NOT LISTENING TO ADVISERS, KNOWING BETTER AFTER YEARS IN POLITICS AND HAVING A HUSBAND AS PRESIDENT. COME ON NOT KNOWING WHAT A "C" MEANT IN AN EMAIL CLASSIFIED WHEN THE REST OF THE WORLD DID. HAVING ENOUGH CELLS PHONES, BLACKBERRIES FOR TEN PEOPLE ALL ON UNSECURED SERVERS IN FOREIGN COUNTRIES, DESTROYING THEM WITH A HAMMER WITH THE COMPUTER INSIDE STILL ACTIVE, LYING ABOUT WRITING NATIONAL SECURITY MATTERS AND SO ON. YOUR REFUSING TO ADDRESS THE SUBJECT IS NOT HELPING YOU OR YOUR TRUST RATING AS THE POLLS HAS SOON. PEOPLE TEND TO BELIEVE THE LAST THING THEY HEARD IN LIEU OF MORE AND NEWER INFORMATION. HIDING WILL NOT MAKE THIS GO AWAY. JUST LIKE HEALTH ISSUES.

PEOPLE NAMELY VOTERS AND FUTURE VOTERS WANT ANSWERS! AND NOT JUST TO THIS BUT U.S. AND WORLD ISSUES. NOT WHY YOU FORGOT A BRIEFING ON SECURITY OR COUGHING AND UNABLE TO SPEAK FOR FOUR MINUTES THEN TODAY NEARLY PASSING OUT AFTER ONLY ONE HOUR AT THE 9/11 MEMORIAL.! SUPPOSE THERE IS ANOTHER 9/11 OR WORST NUCLEAR PROBLEMS. AND IT'S BOTH OF YOU KNUCKLEHEADS. WERE DONE WITH DONATIONS TO CHARITY, COUGHING, FORGETTING, COLLAPSING, EMAILS(JUST APOLOGIZE LOOK AT WASERMAN-SCHULTZ THE HEAD OF THE DNC. SHE APOLOGIZED MOVED ON AND WAS JUST REELECTED BY A LAND SLIDE) LYING AND SO ON. NAME CALLING IS FOR CHILDREN OR HAVE YOU BOTH FORGOTTEN THAT TOO? START ADDRESSING WHAT THE VOTERS WANT TO HEAR THE ISSUES AND WHAT YOU'LL DO ABOUT THEM AND I DON'T MEAN BUILDING A WALL! WE KNOW ENOUGH ABOUT YOU TWO AND YOUR PROBLEMS BUT NOTHING ABOUT WHAT YOU WILL DO IF ELECTED PRESIDENT! THERE ARE ALWAYS WRITE-IN VOTES AND MAYBE MICKEY MOUSE OR DONALD DUCK WILL WIN THIS YEAR JUST ON WRITE-INS.


Sorry everyone now back to the main story medications. ON TV shows and the news from Dr. Phil, 20/20. Prince and too many others to mention. They NEVER mention the people these pills were made for and needed daily and badly.

The makers of Fentanyl never wrote or said to mix with HEROIN AND INJECTED IN ARM OR MAKE HOMEMADE PILLS WITH OTHER DRUGS WHICH KILLED PRINCE AND MANY OF THE KIDS AND ADULTS. Fentanyl is 100 times stronger then Morphine yes, 100 times and when taken correctly you wear a patch which is changed every 3 days(72 hours) and comes in 12 mg, 25 mg, 50 mg,75, and 100 mg. They also make ONE other product and that is like a lolly-pop for pain relieve right away. Again NO pills or anywhere do they say to mix it with heroin. That is what is killing these people(they have no idea how strong Fentanyl is especially taken at full strength at once and how to take it) along with other medications being abused.

A major problem are these shows never mentioning the real use for these drugs PAIN! Yes the company in it's initial ads and papers sent to doctors saying it was NOT addictive and other lies. They were also fined together almost a BILLION dollars. But, there is NO generic Fentanyl or anything like it on the market and so it is needed.

On these TV shows especially like "Intervention" when the person is still alive. Some and a lot of "some" claim they took it from their parents medicine cabinet and for months to years. These parents are in DENIAL and big time as anyone who these drugs prescribed by a doctor for pain and Xanax for other medical reasons are fully aware that under the law they can only get it month to month being a controlled substance. So they would be taking it as prescribed. Then they would be running short every month from the many pills these kids and others claim they were stealing. ANYONE knows especially those who really need them by running short they are going to have bad pain, other medical problems and even start withdrawal symptoms. And anyone who has gone through withdrawn even once is fully aware you do not want to go through it again especially every month. Withdrawal starts in as little as 24 hours. ALSO IT IS CLEARLY MARKED ON THE BOX, INSTRUCTIONS AND EACH PACK HOLDING THE FENTANYL PATCH IT'S FOR PEOPLE ALREADY ON OPIATES FOR A LONG PERIOD OF TIME!

These parents could have locked the medicine cabinet, move the pills, put them in a lock box or any number of other safe places. I am sure if they had young children and with all the warnings on the bottle, with the paper work that comes with the medication and common sense that would not leave a bottle on the table that a young child could find and reach them. Of course people in their right mind would not do this and the parents on TV look very sane.

Others who said their child died from stealing another drug called Methadone. The patient is warned it's poison and must be closely monitored by your doctor. It's poison and very dangerous plus you got them for a reason and would be running short monthly! Also they are so dangerous not even those now closed "Pill Mills" would sell or write a prescription for Methadone.

These idiots like even Dr. Phil and his experts never asked why the parents had the drug(s) to begin with, what happened when they ran short monthly? And the pain pills were made FOR BAD CHRONIC PAIN AND CANCER PATIENTS TO NAME A FEW SO WHAT HAPPENED TOWARDS THE END OF THE MONTH WHEN SO MANY WERE MISSING DUE TO THEIR KIDS THEFT OF THEM? DID THEY, THEIR LOVED ONES OR PATIENT IF THEY WERE A CARE GIVER JUST SUFFER? AND WHEN THE NEW MONTH STARTED WITH THE NEW SUPPLY OF THE MEDICINE ESPECIALLY FENTANYL AT MAX. OR HIGH STRENGTH WITH THE SUDDEN SURGE(AS THE PAIN GETS WORST OR FOR OTHER MEDICAL REASONS A DOCTOR EASES THE PATIENT INTO THE HIGHER DOSES OF THE DRUG(S) DUE TO THE DANGEROUS RISKS INVOLVED OF STARTING AT A HIGH DOSE OF ANY DRUG) OF THE HIGH DOSE OF PAIN MEDICINE INTO THEIR SYSTEM COULD HAVE EASILY GIVEN THEM A HEART ATTACK OR STROKE WHEN THEY HAD TO DO WITHOUT THE PAIN MEDICATIONS THE LAST WEEKS OF THE PREVIOUS MONTH. THIS IS ALL COVERED ON THE BOX, PACK, BY THE DOCTOR AND PAPERWORK IN BIG RED LETTERS AS IT'S A REAL WARNING!

THESE KIDS WEREN'T JUST RISKING THEIR OWN LIVES BUT THOSE THE MEDICATION(S) WERE MEANT FOR. GOT THAT PARENTS?

I AM SORRY BUT I REALLY DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THESE KIDS, ADULTS AND "STARS" WHO DIED FROM THEFT OF DRUGS THEY KNEW NOTHING ABOUT, ILLEGAL DRUGS AND ALL THE OTHER REASONS THEY OVERDOSED TAKING DRUGS NOT MEANT FOR THEM. OR THE INCOMPETENT PARENTS NOW IN DENIAL AND MAD AT THE WORLD. I CARE ABOUT THE MANY OF ALL AGES THESE MEDICINES WERE MADE FOR, THAT NEED THEM DAILY AND WITHOUT TROUBLE GETTING THEM AND GIVE THEM "QUALITY OF LIFE" AND THE ABILITY TO GET UP IN THE MORNING, LOVE, CARING AND DOING THINGS DURING THE DAY WITH AS LITTLE PAIN AS POSSIBLE! IT'S HARD ENOUGH FOR A LOT OF THEM TO KNOW THEIR DYING OR THEIR LOVED ONE(S) ARE WITHOUT BEING IN SO MUCH PAIN THEY CAN'T EVEN GET OUT OF BED OR UP. THEN WONDERING IF THEY CAN GET THE MUCH NEEDED PAIN MEDICATIONS BECAUSE OF THESE PARENTS ON WITCH HUNTS AND TV SHOWS FOR RATINGS OR RISK HAVING TO LEAVE THEIR OWN HOME AND FAMILY FOR HOSPICE AND NO MATTER HOW WONDERFUL AND GREAT THESE VERY SPECIAL NURSES AND DOCTORS ARE THERE IS STILL THE MENTAL ISSUES YOU'LL NEVER LEAVE ALIVE AND THAT AWFUL "SMELL OF DEATH" I KNOW FROM MANY INCLUDING MY UNCLE. ONE THOUGHT FOR YOU PARENTS OF LOST CHILDREN OR LOVED ONES, TV SHOW HOSTS AND WRITERS, THE DEA AND ALL IT MATTERS TOO. EVER HEAR A CHILD BORN WITH CANCER OR WHO DEVELOPS IT AT A YOUNG AGE, LOOSE AN ARM. LEG OR BOTH, HAVE CANCER IN THEIR BRAIN OR BONES OR EVEN BADLY BURNED OR HURT IN AN ACCIDENT AS BOTH HAPPEN MANY TIMES DAILY. ALONG WITH THE OTHERS IN CONSTANT CHRONIC PAIN FOR ANY NUMBER OF REASONS INCLUDING CANCER? COUPLES MARRIED MORE YEARS THEN YOU HAVE BEEN ALIVE WATCHING THEIR LOVED ONE SUFFER AS HE OR SHE FADES AWAY LEAVING THEM ALONE? THAT WHO THESE DRUGS INCLUDING XANAX WERE MADE FOR AND ARE TAKEN CAREFULLY BY THE DIRECTIONS GIVEN! BUT THE YOUNG CHILD EVEN WITH THEIR PARENTS TRYING TO BE BRAVE BUT CRYING HOLDING THEM AS THEY SCREAM IN PAIN IS BY FAR THE WORST THING ON EARTH! SURE I HURT BUT WOULD GIVE UP MY MEDICINE(S) FOR THESE KIDS TO HAVE A CHANCE TO BE PAIN FREE AND A LIFE IF IT CAME TO IT AND I AM NO ONE SPECIAL! JUST SOMEONE WHO CRIES A LOT ALONE IN THE DARK OF NIGHT. THINK ABOUT THAT IF NOTHING ELSE ON YOUR WITCH HUNTS AND TRYING FOR BETTER RATINGS AND MORE MONEY ON YOUR TV SHOW!

**I would also like to apologize for the last paragraph as it might be long sentences with some out of place and some not making sense or repeated! It was by far the hardest paragraph and words I have ever written and God's truth it's all real coming right from my heart not my brain. But even though being very hard to write I felt it finally had to be written. And through the many tears as I wrote it. I just couldn't reread it any more for any changes as every time I tried I could see less. My apologies.

But some drugs these people have died from like Vicodin is given by dentists and doctors for pain, other pains, surgery. broken bones and a lot of other things. From a few days for a tooth ache and pull to as long as you live for chronic pain and cancer. And please don't ever say you can live with the pain taking Motrin, Advil or aspirin which is like putting a band aid on a cut up your leg that takes 25 or more stitches and that is just an example or aspirin being taken for pain during and after major or any surgery!

Now that we covered the parents denials, Fentanyl does NOT make pills nor say to mix and inject with heroin or anything else. Prince and most other were killed by illegally made pills and other illegal drugs and these shows and experts NEVER mention the people the medications are needed and made for. They just scare the HELL( as maybe half are elderly and know the pain of being without them for themselves or loved ones) of the people who need them and the doctors who have the guts to prescribe them. These groups and shows have the DEA involved and others to stop pills and patches from being made and prescribed. Wait till they need them if they already haven't! NOW SOME REPORTS ARE JUST SAYING KILLED BY FENTANYL NOT EVEN ILLEGAL OR INJECTED! I JUST SAW THIS ON A REPORT YESTERDAY OF A YOUNG MODEL.

Fentanyl is pretty much new in the news but have made big stories due to the number of deaths and Prince of course all from illegal use.

A VERY GOOD SHOW THAT WAS JUST MADE TELLS THE TRUTH ABOUT THE DRUG FENTANYL, OVERDOSES, FALSE ADS AND LIES BY THE COMPANY INCLUDING ALL THE FINES, ALL THE WAYS THESE PEOPLE ARE DYING WITH FENTANYL AS THEY WERE NOT PRESCRIBED FOR THEM AND MAKING PILLS ALSO MIXING IT THEN INJECTING IT AND THOSE IT WAS MADE FOR THE REAL ONES WHO NEED IT. THE SHOW IS CALL "THE NAKED TRUTH:DEATH BY FENTANYL".

There now are real doctors prescribing the medicines and a lot of them had extra training to be "Pain Specialists". All they are guilty of is believing the drug reps and commercials they made and finally the DEA or whomever fined the company and stopped the lies. All the lies and such was not needed anyway as it is a good and needed drug. Then the real side effects and such are put into writing with every box, pill and bottle. THESE DOCTORS ARE NOT THE OLD "PILL MILLS" WHO COULDN'T CARE WHY JUST HOW MUCH MONEY THEY WERE MAKING.

Now you may be asking why is this so personal too me. Well there are a few reasons. And very good and close friend of mine lost both her parents to cancer and the pain that came with it. Then my dad had Pancreatic cancer! He had surgery which showed it has spread all over his body and he was given 6 months to live. That was painful enough having the full surgery then came the cancer pain. He went trough it all Chemo and radiation therapy but nothing worked. He did fight it for 3 years and with dignity and mine and other's respect he fought a good fight. But especially towards the end he would NOT have even been able to get up without pain medication. I watched him go from a strong man to almost nothing like his old self. But he NEVER cried nor felt sorry for himself. I lost my mom, his wife many years ago at the young age of 48 years old to heart trouble and then a massive attack. So he needed me and I was proud to be there for him and others I knew suffering from cancer. And I can assure you I cried enough those 3 years for 5 people. He wanted to pass at home and NOT at a Hospice and of course that wish was honored. He lived in West Palm Beach and myself Cooper City both in Florida about 75 miles apart. But it didn't matter if it was 500 miles he needed me and I was there. He has since passed and with him a good piece of my heart.

The next reason is myself. I was stopped at a red light in my small car and a four time drunk driver hit me from behind. When I awoke six days later from a coma I was told by the doctors I had no brain damage(Thank God), but had a broken back and may NEVER walk again and if so with a cane or walker, broken ribs, shoulder, both knees, ankle, lost teeth and many stitches. I was also told my heart stopped twice at the scene and once in the first and third surgeries each) I have had 12 surgeries thus far but they said with so much damage they can't risk more surgeries on my back.

I had no one not being married or having kids and was alone but for the memory of an old friend I have not seen in years but kept I fighting just in case she ever needed me again. After almost four months in the hospital I then spent well over a year doing PT and still go every year for "Tune-Ups" from stiffing etc. I AM WALKING TODAY AND WITHOUT A CANE OR WALKER!

Now I was told after being in the hospital for about ten days by the police traffic investigators. That the driver who hit me was out on bail for a DUI with death, his blood showed at 10 am he was three times over the legal limit, and included in their investigation and from witnesses reports(which they said was unusual but all agreed on the facts as there was a park bench there with many people waiting) he never braked nor could they could find ANY brake marks, he was driving a truck fully loaded with law equipment and hit me while stopped at a red light full on with the experts estimated at over 80 mph and his speedometer stopped at the point of impact also showing about 80 mph, my car a small one was a convertible and being a regular South Florida morning I had the top down< He hit me with such force my car went end over end 3 times before landing on me with the wheels up in the middle of the intersection and the EMS had to use the "The Jaws of Life" to get me out and it took over half an hour their report stated. I mentioned my heart stopped twice and at one point at the ER I was almost declared dead.

After all this they could only do so much for my back I still have two discs that were fractured that did not heal correctly, Three herniated discs, three bulging discs, four elongated discs and other problems that are CHRONIC now. Plus FRACTURED and not healed correctly and they said they could do NO more surgery because of the risk of more damage and being permanently paralyzed.

There were also permanent damage to my knees and hip that would and did become painful chronic and arthritic along with my back. I take 22 medications a day due to the injuries to my bladder, herth, lungs and other organs.

SO I wear PERMANENTLY 100 MG FENTANYL PATCHES(as I mentioned 100 times stronger then morphine but worn correctly so the medicine is released over 3 days 72 hours) THE MAX. FENTANYL MAKES 100 MG AND FOR "BREAKTHROUGH"(which comes from just sitting down, walking more then a few hundred feet to putting down a dog food bowl) PAIN 150 OXYCODONE PILLS A MONTH.

And I was told WITHOUT them I would NOT be able to move. I used to run marathons as people who looked at my albums may have seen. I never took more then a Motrin or Advil so I decided I didn't need these drugs like Fentanyl and Oxycodone that was already in my system. And those expert doctors who I didn't believe at Jackson Memorial in Miami, the Mayo Clinic in Rochester Mn. and Hersey Medical Center in Hershey Pa. All the doctors agreed no more surgeries and massive pain I could not imagine if I stopped.

SO WHAT DO I DO BUT STOPPED THEM AND AS SOON AS THEY STARTED OUT OF MY SYSTEM I COULD HAVE SCREAMED FOR HOURS AND HOURS. TO THIS DAY I DO MY MEDICINES AS PRESCRIBED. AND MUST SLEEP IN A LAZY-BOY AS THE PAIN IS SUCH LYING FLAT EVEN WITH ALL THE MEDICATIONS IT'S VERY, VERY PAINFUL AND I CAN'T GET UP. I am also given a "Cocktail" of Ambien. Xanax 2 mg and Trazodone and yet still awake after only one and a half to two hours every night in a lot of pain and even taking pills for the "breakthrough" pain I am usually up the rest of the night just listening to the radio then trying to get a nap during the day.

So to Dr. Phil and the rest these parents in denial, kids mixing Fentanyl with other drugs or trying to take it straight which on the box and paperwork warns you it could kill you getting the full dose all at once and not to even use a broken or cut patch for that reason. THERE ARE MANY, MANY PEOPLE WHO NEED AND USE THESE MEDICATIONS CORRECTLY JUST TO BE ABLE TO GET UP. WHAT THESE KIDS, ADULTS AND PRINCE DID WAS TAKE THEM EITHER WRONG OR ILLEGALLY MADE LIKE PRINCE AND THE PILLS.

DON'T GO TO THE DEA TO STOP PAIN PILLS AND SCARE THE HELL OUT OF THE REAL PEOPLE WHO NEED THEM ESPECIALLY PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF, MY DAD AND ANYONE ELSE WITH CHRONIC PAIN OR CANCER OR ANY NUMBER OF OTHER MEDICAL REASONS! THE SENORS ARE SCARED AND I SEE IT EVERY TIME I'M AT THE PHARMACY THAT THEMSELVES OR THEIR LOVED ONES THAT HAVE FELT THE PAIN WOULD LOSE THESE MEDICATIONS OR DOCTORS AFRAID OF THE DEA.YOU PEOPLE ARE PUSHING TO BAN THE MEDICATION GIVING US QUALITY OF LIFE TO GET UP EACH DAY AND MOVE SOMEWHAT PAIN FREE!

IS IT SO MUCH TO MENTION ON THESE SHOWS THESE PILLS WERE MADE AND ARE NEEDED BY SO MANY?

Even from my own insurance company CarePlus who wrote in a report to members as your show Dr. Phil and others including what I thought was legitimate shows like yours, 20/20 and 60 minutes scared many people including cancer victims, chronic people in pain, parents of children born with cancer etc. and the elderly just for ratings that due to some stupid people including Prince and these kids who got pills illegally that were made in someone's basement or others who injected it with other drugs and still snorted other medications that these people who really need the medication will NOT be able to get their much needed pain medications Mainly due to these and your show and these half cocked guilt ridden parent. Careplus Insurance wrote beside not to worry they will always cover prescribed pain medications that concerning all this recent news about pain pills especially Fentanyl and other CONTROLLED MEDICATIONS" "THAT YOUR NOT AN ADDICT IF YOU TAKE A PRESCRIBED MEDICATION FOR MEDICAL NEEDS AND YOUR TAKING IT AS PRESCRIBED BY YOUR DOCTOR".

I DID NOT asked to be hit by a dead drunk driver who walked away with some bruises while I was almost killed. And every person with chronic pain and especially cancer DID NOT ask for that either and the pain and sorrow which goes with it. And the abuse of Xanax which many take for anxiety and depression over losing a loved one, having a sick loved one and for many years married. ISIS. the national alert system going up or being deathly sick yourself. Or just being able with so much pain to relax enough to rest.

I myself have seen people with pain from a tooth being pulled to end stage cancer. All needing something and have also seen people like Dr. Phil and others talking about banning pain pills because of the few who abused them and many stealing them from their parents and of course they not being prescribed for them they never read the warnings or bottle, listened to the doctor's orders on taking them and paperwork with them by a legitimate doctor who cared about the person and NOT the money. THEY HAD NO IDEA OF FENTANYL BEING NEW THE STRENGTH AND DANGER IF MISS USING IT AND HOW THE HIGH DOSE WOULD KILL THEM. SO DON'T BLAME US WHO NEED THEM OR THE DOCTORS ON YOUR WITCH HUNTS!

Dr. Phil I honestly thought your show with the experts was legitimate. But now see you don't care about people as Oprah first said and not ratings and money. But now see all that matters to you is ratings, being renewed and money as in all your shows and there has been many like others on the subject of pain pills and overdoses but NONE have mentioned including your shows why the parent even had the medicine and more IMPORTANT THE PEOPLE THEY WERE MADE FOR AND NEEDED THEM DAILY TAKING THEM AS PRESCRIBED BY AN HONEST DOCTOR WHO CARES ABOUT THEIR PATIENTS WELL BEING AND HEALTH.

One more question Dr. Phil have you ever had surgery without pain medications, dental work, cancer, had or knew someone with chronic real pain that had real surgery, CTs and MRIs? Or seen anyone with end stage cancer or hit by a car or been in an accident they didn't ask for and the suffering before anything is given for the pain? I don't think so because a real doctor who took the oath and anyone with morals with NOT keep much needed medicine for those who truly need it and that it was made for. And NOT mentioning this once on the many shows you and others have done on pain pills and overdoses! I respect Oprah, the Oath and you at one time. But now to see your doing this and especially making doctors afraid to write much needed pain medications and to try and ban the much needed pain medications for ratings and money because of parents in denial, kids and adults stealing drugs not knowing their risks or getting illegal drugs?

And the many lawyers ready to sue a company that is how they make a big living just because people did not reading the bottle, information or instructions that came with the drug. For anyone who cares when there was a phone book before the internet there was three times more lawyers most personal injury then all doctors combined listed.

Dr. Phil it is NOT too late to at least mention on your show and other shows on drugs, abuse and overdoses the need for the pain medications by almost everyone at one time or another!

I also thank God I have a regular doctor, pain doctor and insurance company that knows better then is what is being shown on TV shows like Dr. Phil, 20/20, 60 minutes and others. And also written in papers, magazines and of course the internet. That these doctors and insurance companies know the real truth and are not afraid of you and others like mad parents who now feel guilty and want to go after anyone and everyone no matter why they need the medication(s), shows trying for ratings and more money so they don't do what is morally and medically right. You people especially with your money hungry lawyers ready to sue has scared away in the past baby doctors that even though they knew they were right, did nothing wrong but the lawyers know with the cost and time of depos, court, malpractice insurance they will just settle and with the cost of their lawyers changed their fields of medicine or left the state making it almost impossible to find someone to deliver a baby thanks to these lawyers and shows but mostly the lawyers who depend and know the costs and are even on TV and doctors who did NOTHING wrong but bring a new life into the world want to settle right away and leave while these lawyers are on now even have phones lines set up and ready like 1-800-Bad-Drugs or "call me now to sue the doctor. I want to be your lawyer" so now it's pain pill time and you already scared away many good doctors by your actions from writing much needed pain medications? Even now in my 50's because of shows and abuse I have to show ID just to buy a box of cold medicine at the pharmacy maybe once a year. What is next after baby doctors. pain pills, cold medications for you to try and ban or make it very hard to get for those who need it just for ratings and money?

We didn't want another Jerry Springer I liked many believed in you. I partly due to Oprah whom I greatly respected and some other shows like Dr. Oz who cares about all people. The shame is so many people still believe in you and other shows and are trying to get much needed pills and patches banned without thinking of the real people who need them or even they might in their future for any number of reasons I mentioned. You got what you wanted a "following" now where are you going to lead them?

Dr. Phil I am not a professional writer just someone who sees a wrong like what I wrote about DUIs, "ZEKA" virus, unarmed black men being shoot, good cops being shoot, ambushed and killed due to other's actions, a black caregiver lying on the ground with his hands in the air yelling that is his charge sitting there at his feet playing with a toy truck and suffering from severe Autism and after 10 minutes of not moving or lowering his hands all this caught on cameras(some TV) a white SWAT Marksmen police officer shots the black man lying on the ground hands up and then claims he was aiming for the big white guy with Autism just sitting there scared(It still makes me sick and ashamed of that cop and his supervisor on scene who said after 10 minutes and when the two people made no move or anything he went to his car the moment the cop fired so could not say what happened even with TV crew and a bunch of personal cameras. The caregiver should have gotten a medal for his compassion and love not shot. And this all started with an unknown phone call to 911? He also had a teaser no deadly force was needed and as all have seen this went on for quite awhile and in broad day light. Everyone saw there was no gun or threat to anyone yet you fired! Your a Swat marksman being 10 feet away and said you were aiming for some reason at the big white guy sitting there with a toy truck never moving but very scared and you hit a black man lying flat in the leg instead? How can you even look into the mirror black, white were all humans!! I know I repeated myself but I know many police many put their lives in the line daily for us and just want to get home to their families but take their oath to protect and serve 24/7. I am proud to call many my friends but you make me sick and still do now and that's the truth of the situation!). Other blogs include Illegals and much more and trying to make it right or at least known too other especially out of this area what is happening here along with the truth and what really happened in any given situation along with some personal opinions.

Again I am NOT a professional, did not care for grammar and English in school and never took a course on writing or anything much less a blog. Because of my back and even with all the medications it took 6 days and many hours to get this done. I felt it needed to be said but sorry it's so long and repeated at times as I can only sit for so long and then the pain and stiffness. So rereading when I should be writing was hard especially on this one that hits so many people and so close to my own life..

Please all have a safe and reasonable day,
Dave M.
Email: dsm4857@gmail.com

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Replied By: JWL123 on Sep 5, 2016, 3:45PM - In reply to lwalla31
I am so sorry for all that you are going through. I also know how hard it is to find good drs that will find out what is wrong with you and help with the pain. My dr of 20 yrs just went to prison for Medicaid fraud so I am currently without a dr. I too have daily health problems, I have a hearniated disc in my neck, Degenerative Disc disease in lower and upper back along with leg pain (Unknown source of the pain) Fibromylgia, Chronic Fatigue and Carpel Tunnell. I am having surgery on my left wrist Wednesday for the Carpel tunnell. The thing that causes me the most pain though is my legs and neck.


I am from NC also... I really care and hope that you get the help you need to find out what is causing the headaches and hope you can get some relief from them.  
 
Replied By: nightlady on Aug 21, 2016, 1:37AM - In reply to lwalla31
I didn't understand all you were trying to say but there are people that care.  Sometimes people just don't know how to help someone.  I understand about insurance and not having the money to buy it and it not being the right time and all that.  Those of us that have limited incomes all face those same problems.  I'm really sorry you are having all these difficulties and health problems.  If no one else cares, God does.  It might not feel like it, but he does and I care.  We live in a time when our government seems to fail us at every turn, but we have to hold on to hope.  I will pray that you get insurance and find the answer to your health issues. All you can do is do the best you can until things start happening for you.  Don't give up, don't lose hope.
 
Replied By: lwalla31 on Aug 19, 2016, 5:55PM
Hello

        Hope this letter find you well.  I'm have some problems with a broken bone in my neck with my c7,my c3, c4 and off of the tip of my spinal cord.  I fell off of a rope at my grand fathers house and landed on my face, well I hit the ground so hard my head came back and broke my vertebrates and the talk about fractures from doctors.  I was around ten years old and every since, I have suffered from headacks with out knowing the problems at hand.  My mother took me as a child growing up to find out the reasons for the headacks everyday, but to resolves.  As I got older my problems got worse.  I'm 37 years old and done around 5 years in college and had to take a medical leave because I could not find a doctor that would take care of me while I was working on my master's at UNCC 49ers in charlotte NC.  This has taken a lot of my life away and I no God thru Christ heals but they also want to see you all and other Country's and Continent's doing there job as well.  I do have a issue because when I had insurance but they still acked like just passing me around to doctors to doctors with no idea on what to do.  Well finally when my insurance drop, (blue cross etc.) I didn't have the money to get it started back right then so I had to wait.  But then as the time passed along, I got the money to get insurance, I couldn't because how things are set up.  The enrollment date was the issue. So once again no insurance and no help. Thru Obama care, blue cross, cigma, and I meen nothing.  I value a education and meen well but have life treating problems and need some help, wondering if anyone really cares at all.  Besides money and greed, and only what they want out of life.  So I'm reaching out with a caring heart to see if anyone really cares, which it seems I already have my answers.  Hopeing you all would prove me wrong.  You sir with the meens you have why would you not go out with a bang in your presidentry and so the world a caring heart.  Come get me and help me get fixed so I can go back to school and finish my life. And run for prime mister in Israel  where my true home is in this world. So I no what a real life is like with out pain and mirser.  Thanks again
                                         Lewis Adam Wallace Jr  

          So the world how people really works.
 
Replied By: nightlady on Aug 16, 2016, 10:44AM - In reply to yesyoucan
I was very worried about you.  Hadn't seen anything from you in awhile.  Sorry to hear about all the troubles.  Hope things start getting better for you soon.  Hang in there!!  I have my okay days and my bad days but have to hang in there for my mom, who will be 87 next month.  I am planning to take her back to the town we lived in four years ago, for a visit, later this month for a few days.  Then in September for her birthday a girlfriend and I are taking her to Disneyland one last time.  We took her 3 years ago and she said she wanted to go one more time, so that's what were going to do.  I've been having a lot of trouble with my hip and I'm just hoping I can handle all the walking and standing.  Getting old is not for the faint of heart that's for sure.  Have a good day and I'll chat again soon.
 
Replied By: yesyoucan on Aug 16, 2016, 8:04AM - In reply to lindamw77
Rudy is so right about breathing relaxation tips, walks etc..  Often panic attacks occur because when anxious or depressed our breathing can become shallow.  

Some links Dr. Phil suggests:  

suicide prevention 800 273 TALK 1 800 273 8255

http://www.drphil.com/advice/anxiety-disorders/

http://www.drphil.com/shows/24/  

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/panic-attacks-and-panic-disorders.htm

Things that have helped me are 1) Brachs little real peppermint candies with real peppermint oil.  Peppermint can have a relaxing effect.  

2) Writing Fear Not. Have Faith...  over and over if extremely stressed by a particular unexpected event. Example:  Write Fear Not.  Have Faith... across each line and/or down entire sheet of notebook paper.

3) Learned to equalize breathing reading Dr. Phil's son, Jay's, book with a teen here that wanted someone to read his books with her.  Then, Dr. Phil did a mini breathing exercise version on The Doctors.  Oh, also, there is Doctor On Demand to visit with a doctor online that Jay and Dr. Phil began.  

http://www.doctorondemand.com

Breathing exercises of Dr. Phil and Jay.  All three suggested breathing in and out each way to same count whether to count of 7 each way (Dr. Phil's original), to count of 5 each way (in Jay's book he learned in Martial Arts) or to the count of 3 each way mini version Dr. Phil shared on The Doctors TV show.  

If in public I do the mini version.  At home I most often do to the count of five each way.  As lightly touch finger tips: calmly keep count breathing in to the count of five, then exhaling to the count of five.  Do five times each time touching next finger till you do five times.  

Once when very stressed during an unexpected distressing event:  I substituted Have faith as breathed in and Fear Not as breathed out.  The connotative meanings of these two mini phrases have a calming effect for me.  I hope you find what helps you.  

4) Keeping healthy habits of sleep, diet, fluids, rest and activity usually helps us all to feel healthy.  Life is mostly habit.  Sleeping so much you likely have a lot of pent up energy that walking might be a good release for if your doctor thinks okay for you to walk.  In fact, Cooper Institute discovered walking worked well since walking a natural mood elevator since oxygenates the brain.  Breathe... calmly...  Hope you are feeling better.

 
Replied By: yesyoucan on Aug 16, 2016, 7:42AM - In reply to rudy03
Glad you, lindamw77 and nightlady were here for each other.  Love the purple heart.  How'd you do that?
 
Replied By: yesyoucan on Aug 16, 2016, 6:58AM - In reply to nightlady
I checked back a couple of days after my last reply then several mishaps on the farm had me more than a bit down.  Situational.  Lynn loves the farm.  I don't.  After he killed water moccasin 15 feet from my bedroom door.  Well, didn't go outside unless he was with me since he sees better.  Then, plumbing messed up here so we are both bathing outside.  Lynn was like, "No problem... I know how to make an outdoor shower from when in Viet Nam."  Is rather liberating just so UPS man doesn't pull up yet in many aspects... beyond depressing.  You know how we ladies love a nice tub and shower. Likely, will take a HUGE lose when sell IF farm will even sell...  I'm blessed even so yet a lot easier to count blessings when all your ducks are in a row.  

Me too as per sleep.  Screaming snake nightmares first few months here after seeing FOUR poisonous snakes by house first week.  Owners said they'd never seen any snakes by house only to learn lady here had called a neighbor while her husband gone since huge snake by porch by bedroom door.  Her husband was making crosses he sells at flea markets in shop when we came to look at house so we trusted person to be honest since making religious crosses.  No.  Lied on disclosures no termites only to learn are.  Inspector crooked...  Got lawyer to sue yet Lynn so overwhelmed since we'd already sold our house and so hard to move here didn't want to.  However, lawyer said common for city folk to be taken advantage of by local folks.  

Lynn is a Special Forces Green Beret Medic Veteran with one silver and two bronze stars and I'm heartsick more for him since his dream since Vietnam of owning farm became a nightmare.  He said we are moving next year.  So stressful being out here will be doing like Dr. Phil suggests when moving taking as little as possible.  So whoever gets farm in some aspects will be set with furnished home, tractor, shop full of tools etc.  Plus, we put a new metal roof on and chain link fence around back and barbed wire fence so can have horses etc. and have two.  Beautiful just even Lynn is seeing quite an undertaking even if everything goes right to decide to move to country when senior citizens.

Like today.  Need to bathe before going to town.  Lassie got me up at 4 a.m. to go outside and I couldn't go back to sleep.  Waited till 6 a.m. to get up to not wake Lynn who is so blessed to go to sleep when his head hits the pillow and sleep sometimes till 9 a.m.  I have to stay up to be sure Lassie and Eddie come back in since a neighbor had a dog killed by a bobcat.  Constantly looking over shoulder bathing outside to see if a snake decides wants a bath too like any of the relatives of cotton mouth Lynn shot.  Lassie needs to go out again...  BRB  

Birds:  Thanks for sharing your bird knowledge.  Much appreciated.  There's a wild bird out here that has a two part whistle.  One long whistle followed by a very short whistle.  Sometimes I'll do first part and he'll do last part.  Others he does first part and I do last part.  Wonder if as fun for the little bird as it is for me...   I loved my little canaries yet unaware only males sing so my two females, Vega and Deneb, didn't.   My zebra finch, Arctu, was like a miniature rooster with his cadence when the sun rose.  Toot, toot, toot... toot tootle la toot... toot tootle la toot.  I do love the front room here that I am in now.  Noticed you'd been feeling down and hope you are feeling better.  

I'm the same as you with rest.  I can get so sleepy just curl up in chair yet if I go to bed... wake up in route and toss and turn and turn and toss.  Partly, since I went from a queen size to a full size bed and on antique frame.  Bed so high, now, need a step stool to get off and on.  I am concerned I'll roll off bed or trip making a pit stop during the night.  Lots of things you think you always wanted, like Antique poster bed, once have discover, "Well maybe not after all."  LOL.  Rolled off a top bunk in  basement of a cousin of mother's once and landed on washer then rolled off onto a heap of clothes.  Bunk beds in basement and we'd gone over during tornado alert.  Thought so cool to be on top bunk until rolled off.  LOL  I guess I have bed PTSD.  We never used to vacation so lets just say we are on year three of an extended Dude Ranch vacation.  Lynn is happy as a lark since he's a dude.  :)
 
Replied By: lindamw77 on Aug 6, 2016, 8:44PM - In reply to rudy03
Rudy, thanks for the suggestions.  I found MoodGYM online and going through that course.  It's teaching me  about cognative thinking. I heard that works.  Yeah I know i need a theropist but no luck with getting one  :( so I'm trying this MoodGYM and call crises line if I get really bad.  I really thank you Rudy for texting me here.  It helps me know I'm not alone and someone cares and identifys.  Yeah I take depression med.  I also have ocd but can't take meds cause they cause me to sleep more then I do now so dr. said no to that.  I can sleep 12 - 15 hrs a day just to avoid life.  i guess thats my drug.. sleep.  If I'm sleeping I don't have to deal with anybody or anything. I'm in a catch 20/20. I can be "normal" sometimes, and not normal at the other times.  That's when I sleep.     lindamw77
 
Replied By: rudy03 on Aug 6, 2016, 1:20AM - In reply to lindamw77
I feel your pain! I'm guessing you're on medication? You need to find a therapist you can connect with. Calling a support line might help you until it passes. Has anyone told you: Remember to breath, stay away from caffeine, get fresh air and walk some. Talk to your panic attack camly and say " ok, move along!" sing a song you like or think of a funny memorie. A hospital is not the answere unless you're going to hurt yourself. It won't be easy at all but you need to get to the root of this. Please let me know if I can help. I'm no Dr. but as you, I've been through hell and back. Stay strong your never alone. 💜
 
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