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2014 Shows

Ben says his wife, Kelly, convinced him to get married six months ago, and as soon as the paperwork was signed, she completely changed -- for the worse! He says she has gained a significant amount of weight, is no longer affectionate and stopped cleaning and cooking his favorite meals. Ben says he’s “disgusted” by his wife’s appearance and says if not for their 4-year-old son, he would have left by now. Kelly admits she has gained weight since getting married but says she has lost her self-worth because Ben demeans her every day. She says Ben lost 100 pounds and then turned into a “narcissist” and a “jerk” -- and she suspects he is cheating on her. When Dr. Phil presses Ben for answers, will he get to the truth? And, can this marriage be saved? (OAD: 4-18-14)

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: nzder110 on Oct 22, 2014, 3:28AM
It is very easy to talk about divorce when you don't have children to take care of, or you are so rich you can just move into another house, or stay at a hotel.  I think this situation does probably call for a divorce, I don't know how you could go home with a man who shows so much contempt, but I do get that the logistics of getting a divorce, especially when you are a stay at home mum would be scarey and hard.  I hope that Dr Phil and her friends and family can provide her with the confidence and the support to leave this man.  She deserves a better life than that, I hope she lives happily ever after.
Replied By: susielyn on Aug 11, 2014, 11:53AM
This guy has been looking in someone's else's mirror.
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Aug 9, 2014, 3:44PM - In reply to banksoftheohio
So now you're diagnosing Kelly with mental problems in excusing her decision to stay with her husband, day after day after day? How about laziness, having to get out there and work for a living or the need to have a man, any man, in her life? She trades off the abuse for the luxury of sitting at home and being supported. Complacency is not a mental disorder!
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Aug 9, 2014, 3:36PM - In reply to upsydasy
very welcome!
Replied By: upsydasy on Aug 8, 2014, 10:05AM - In reply to alwaysaskeptic
What a nice compliment :o)
Replied By: banksoftheohio on Aug 8, 2014, 5:03AM - In reply to alwaysaskeptic
My next sentence said "the real tragedy would be spending one more day with this loser."  We can see things logically while watching from our homes, but people in their home are seeing something totally different.  I was saying that it is how people who are in this mental fog think, that "this is the way it has to be."  The misery and abuse become normal, they compartmentalize and think only about day-to-day rather than what will be better for the future.   I'm not saying it's right, but that's how they get. Someone has to have true mental problems if he/she is getting to the point where Kelly is; Dr. Phil recognizes that and offered Kelly help with getting her life better. 
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Aug 7, 2014, 6:50PM - In reply to banksoftheohio
...that you excuse all these women who won't leave abusive men by reciting the same old tired script about her self-esteem being destroyed by these evil, master manipulators. Nothing is on her? She's a spineless automaton with no free will or sense of right and wrong? You wouldn't make excuses for her if she worked at a job and every payday she accepted no money for her work. You'd think she was crazy. She's excused for putting up with crap because she's already got "X" years invested in her misery so she may as well ride it out? She doesn't want the kids to change schools? I personally think there's a lot more to it and the woman has to own her decision to stay, not just play the teary-eyed victim.
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Aug 7, 2014, 6:37PM - In reply to upsydasy
at its best!!
Replied By: upsydasy on Aug 7, 2014, 8:15AM - In reply to alwaysaskeptic
It’s valid to use the husband’s criteria of what is or isn’t attractive.  In this case, since he’s extremely shallow and judges his wife’s worth solely based on her physical appearance, we tend to use the same principles to judge him in return.  Clearly he was wrong to think of himself as God’s gift to women or Britney Spears for that matter, and most of us didn't hesitate to tell him so.  Tit for tat – plain and simple.

Replied By: banksoftheohio on Aug 7, 2014, 6:25AM
Wow wow wow... Cocky on video then tearful and contrite on stage.  Kelly shouldn't believe a word this guy says!  In fact, I think she knows what a liar he is already, and if she has a good support network she can leave Ben forever.  She should because she still has time to live a happy life and find a man who will love her.  Let Ben find his Brittany Spears--haha ironic he uses Brittany to describe his "perfect woman" after all the ups and downs that celebrity has been through in her young life!  I understand it will not be easy for Kelly to leave even after all crap her husband has done.  Her self-worth has been beaten to the ground by someone who she thought loved her.  People like her get to the point of thinking "well we've already been together X-number of years, so what's the use of leaving now?"  The real tragedy would be wasting one more day with that loser.  You can't get back the past but that doesn't mean you have to continue those mistakes into the future; sometimes you have to give up on the things you start!  Life won't perfect, but you can at least make it good!  Kelly is an attractive woman and I think she will do well when she's ready to meet someone new, someone who can make her happy.  She knows she has to lose weight and I believe she will get her health back.  I just really hope she will not take back Ben though--the damage has been done, that ship has sailed.
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