2013 Shows

Mary says she’s worried her 17-year-old daughter, Missy, is seriously addicted to the Internet and fears she won’t turn into a responsible adult. Mary says she’s tried to distract her daughter by buying her a pony and even a donkey, but nothing captures her interest like her virtual world. But when Dr. Phil meets Mary, Missy and Mary’s fiancé, Jude, he discovers a much more serious concern: Missy admits she’s met more than 100 men online, has gotten into cars with many of them at the first meeting and has even invited several of them over to her house while her parents weren’t home. Missy says she doesn’t worry about her dangerous Internet behavior because if nothing bad has happened to her yet, then it probably won’t. What does she say she gets from the online relationships that she doesn’t get from her family? When Mary and Jude hear the details about Missy’s online interactions, will they begin to grasp the gravity of the situation? Dr. Phil gives this family a serious wake-up call. If your child has access to the Internet, this is a must-watch show! And, don’t miss part two tomorrow.

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: songwriterlive on Sep 3, 2015, 10:53AM
Mary is a narcissistic mother, and Missy her scapegoat child. This mother went on Dr Phil for two reasons:
1. to get attention (narcissistic supply) and
2. to exonerate herself from any blame should the child get hurt.
The book Dark Souls explains:
"Because the narcissist cannot accept her faults, she spends her days trying to convince herself that everything she does is perfect. When her personality disorder causes distress within her family, and her children’s issues begin to reflect this, the narcissistic mother is forced to make a choice. She must either acknowledge that she is making mistakes that are affecting her children negatively, or she must try to convince herself and others that the problems are coming not from her, but another source. And the latter is the option the narcissist always and unfailingly selects. In her mind, by blaming another, she absolves herself of any wrongdoing, and she can continue to believe - and strive to convince others - that she is in fact, perfect. But she must first have someone to blame. Enter the scapegoat."
Here is a mother who tells her child on public television that she loves and cares about her, but clearly does no such thing at home. For reasons why Missy has so many emotional problems, and more on this subject, see the website, Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. I hope to God someone sees this post and helps this child!
Replied By: honeypot617 on Dec 1, 2014, 11:30AM - In reply to jmano1
I agree, it is not about him (the mom's boyfriend/partner).  The mother needs to step up and do her job instead of devoting all her time and attention to this guy.   He is not Missy's biological father and in many cases, I believe that allowing some outsider to discipline your child is a "no no".   The same is true in the show with Tory and Kip, where the mom was allowing the stepfather to be cruel to her daughter.  I don't think Jude is a bad person but Missy is not his responsibility...her mother is the one who needs to spend quality time with her and really nurture her.   My stepfather's idea of "discipline" was constant, unrelenting verbal and emotional abuse that still affects me to this day.  He probably would have physically and sexually abused me given the chance.
Replied By: honeypot617 on Dec 1, 2014, 11:20AM - In reply to nasale
I agree with you...sometimes there is a fine line between "discipline" and "abuse".  Everyone's situation is different, of course, but I believe that sometimes the biological parent should have the responsibility of discipline NOT the step-parent.  The only time a step-parent should be allowed to discipline is if they are kind, capable of being fair, and don't cross the line or mistreat the child.  Maybe I am a bit biased since I was the stepdaughter of a man who made my life miserable for many years without justification for doing so.
Replied By: honeypot617 on Dec 1, 2014, 11:14AM - In reply to tinat2004
I see your point, and I agree that in some cases a stepfather/stepmother should have some input about the children.  I have no problem with a step-parent being allowed to discipline a child but ONLY IF the step-parent is kind, capable of being fair, and doesn't overstep their boundaries too much.   I believe Dr. Phil is mostly correct in saying that some of these step-parents are crossing the line.  The issue is not discipline itself...the issue is that many people are handling things the wrong way.  I had a stepfather who made my life miserable for years and my mother did nothing to stop him from treating me badly.  That is one situation where a step-parent should have absolutely no say at all in raising a child.  Too many people come into a child's life and do more harm than good...sometimes they just need to leave the discipline up to the biological parent.  But everyone's situation is different and some step-parents truly care about the kids.  To this day, I wish my own experiences growing up had been more positive but sadly that isn't the case.  

Replied By: honeypot617 on Nov 30, 2014, 7:19PM - In reply to nessaholt
You are right on the money about this!  I can't believe people are blaming Missy when she is obviously not the problem in this situation.
Replied By: goldenbeach on Dec 9, 2013, 10:47PM
Very cruel, IMO, to give a child this name.   But the mother seems very cold, so not surprising.
Replied By: heidi97701 on Sep 22, 2013, 4:17AM
Dr. Phil.  My daughter will turn 21 in December.  When she was 13 (maybe 12), I found inappropriate behavior on her computer (my husband and I always monitored both of our children's internet activity).  I explained the dangers to her, and also provided her with newspaper articles related to the internet and abductions.  It was a very scary time!  Later she began to again show inappropriate behavior as it related to facebook (she was 16 at this time).  I took her computer away, had her delete her facebook and myspace accounts, and that is how it stayed until she was 18.  For her 18th birthday, her friend built a facebook page for her.  She was happy to have it back, but was much more aware by then of the dangers of the internet.  My daughter suffers from borderline personality disorder (we found out later), and part of this is that she tends to put herself in the place of a victim.  This happened often as she was growing up, and it was challenging.  We went through several councelors before having a tragic situation within our family, which I won't get into, but we finally found a councelor that confirmed our suspicions of borderline personality disorder.  She worked with her for a year on how to identify her behaviors, and change them.  I am so happy that we didn't give up.  She will always struggle with this, but she has the tools to succeed and I am very proud of her.
Replied By: hazeld12 on Sep 21, 2013, 1:46PM - In reply to kschaecher
Be appalled then, typical response fron the parents of today, just wait until it's your turn!!!
Replied By: hazeld12 on Sep 21, 2013, 1:35PM - In reply to jmano1
He's just the guy who pays this kid's living expenses. Duh!
Replied By: lindee_1 on Sep 20, 2013, 5:35PM - In reply to bwein301
Yes hopefully Dr Phil will teach them this can happen. Both mom & daughter need to realize this wont happen over night, but in time it will.
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