Sign up for the Dr. Phil Newsletter
Twitter Facebook YouTube

2009 Shows

 
What would you do if your little boy wanted to be a little girl? Dr. Phil continues the heated topic of gender-confused kids. After the last show, viewers had a lot to say about the subject, and the message boards lit up with their impassioned opinions. Now, Dr. Phil speaks with Toni, a mother who says she can’t stop grieving the loss of her son who, at 11, began to transition into a female. Toni feels like her son has died, and she’s having a hard time adjusting to having a daughter. Joining the discussion is family researcher Glenn Stanton and psychologist Dr. Joseph Nicolosi, who say it’s the parents' responsibility to guide their children into their gender-born identities. On the opposite side are psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel and psychotherapist Dr. Michele Angello, who say children are born this way, and parents should support their children in their decision to transition to the opposite sex. What do you think is the best way to treat a child with gender identity confusion? Don’t miss the heated debate as Dr. Phil continues to explore this fervid and hotly contested topic. Then, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.
Comments
Replied By: toniugalde on Nov 13, 2010, 12:42AM - In reply to billiray
 
Hi,
First i want to apoligize for taking so long to respond to ur comment. I first would like u to take a look at the 2 photos of my transgendered child tell me does she at 15 years old look like she doesn't know who she is. I do recognize that my response to those two gentlemen on the show was harsh. But there were things going on on stage that people could not see the smirks and sly smiles that they were directing at me. This has not been an easy transition in my life. I was very clear with the Dr Phil staff that I would not go on a show and debate my child. I was promised that that would not happen the show was suppose to be about the loss in our family. Clearly none of that was touched on. And I certainly was not going to allow them to blame me for my child's brain disorder i ama good mom. I never drank ,smoked, or did drugs during my pregnancy it could of happened to anyone including you and ur family. And than maybe if someone was on stage accussing u of being to close to ur child maybe u also might not have been to nice. My objective of going on the show was to educate people that we were just a normal family. and sometimes we just have to accept what we get and do the best we can. If u believe what those men said that they could cure someone from being homosexual or lesbian than please I have a bridge I want to sell u.
Thank you for taking time out of ur day to
comment on something u can't possibly
undrestand,
Sincerely,
Toni Ugalde


 
Replied By: toniugalde on Nov 13, 2010, 12:13AM - In reply to true_believer
thank u is all i can say
 
Replied By: toniugalde on Nov 13, 2010, 12:00AM - In reply to stephanieagten
 
Hi I just wanted to take a minute to reply to ur comment on the show. On some points i agree with u the show was pointless. I was very clear that I did not want to have a debate about my child, so therefore it turned into a 3 ring circus. Everyone can have an opinion on what I should have done ,but noone was sitting in my shoes and the people who have been sitting in my shoes and wanted to save their childrten would have and did do the same thing I did. My only regret was not listening to my child sooner so that she could of had the childhood she deserved to have. Unfortunately I was uneducated on transgender and just thought it was a phase. But I love my child and as the photo shows she is happy, beautiful and well adjusted. It is the rest of the world that is unajusted. I believe that fear motivated people and they think if it could happen to that person it could happen to me. But again we thank you for ur thoughts.

Toni and Ashley
 
Replied By: toniugalde on Nov 12, 2010, 11:45PM
 
To all of u in support of my story I and Ashley thank u all! We r doing well and hope it all keeps going well. Wish us luck and keep us in ur prayers.
Thank You,
Toni and Ashley
 
Replied By: anni1ism on Oct 27, 2010, 9:37AM
Being interested in GID, and transgernderism in general, I happened across this episode, "Little Boy Lost". After having your case stated, Toni, two so-called  "experts" started in with an agenda of their own. Unfortunately, they were not there to help you with your feeling of loss. I think that you and Dr. Siegal came across as the voices of reason. A big hug to you, and I hope that you have found the solace you so desperately sought. Thinking of you.
 
Replied By: kustomlady on Apr 6, 2010, 8:05AM
"Premature labeling may then lead some adolescents into harmful... behaviors that they otherwise would not pursue."


Doctors say the APA may be spreading misinformation about human sexuality...
http://www.citizenlink.org/CLtopstories/A000012389.cfm
 
Replied By: gregls on Feb 15, 2010, 2:18AM
I'm not interested in watching a show that proposes to be "neutral" on a medical question. For instance, I'm not interested in watching a show that is neutral on whether smoking contributes to lung cancer. I say, follow the evidence and make an informed decision.
These are the questions a show on reparative therapy should answer: 1. Is reparative therapy effective in "curing" the conditions it proposes to "cure"? 2. Does reparative therapy make people more or less depressed? 3. Does reparative therapy reduce suicide rates? 4. Does reparative therapy promote self-acceptance among customers? 5. What do customer satisfaction rates indicate about reparative therapy?
These are all questions that can be answered with science, not by looking at both sides and making up your mind.
 
Replied By: stephanieagten on Jan 21, 2010, 9:05AM - In reply to helolinda
I'm from Belgium and I only got to see the show yesterday and I strongly feel that I need to comment to this matter...
first of all, helolinda, if you mean treating the mental disorder as in curing the child... I'll have to disappoint you because there is absolutely no cure for autism nor dyslexia...
second, I thought this show wasn't clarifying at all... you 'professionals' were all just babbling on and on without even listening to eachother... I mean if there is something like psy-something in your status, you ought to know that you're not making progress in the debat that way... You had to step in, Dr Phil, you were the go-between, you just had to shush them!  I also think that it was good to have an opinion from a mother's angle but it was wrong to let Toni into the actual discussion because she was way to involved... she must have felt as if she were attacked, she must have felt like a terrible mother and there's no way Toni had bad intentions against her own flesh and blood, her very own child. So I'm deffinitaly not saying you did wrong, Toni... Everybody has an opinion and everyone wants to be heard, and that's just not possible when you interrupt eachother...
About the subject... I do think that almost every child goes through a fase like this and I do believe that it's the parents job to 'correct' him/her... If he wants to play with barbies, don't let him. But offcourse, if he wants to plays with barbies when he's 10 years older, you know that something isn't quite right and that's when you need to accept that your child is different... So I'm just saying there's a difference between actually beeing a girl trapped in a boy's boddy and going through this fase... I do believe that it is possible to feel that way, but time will tell...
Please mind that I'm not American, nor English...
 
Replied By: helolinda on Oct 23, 2009, 1:59PM

Well if I have a child with a brain disorder I'd treat it. for example if my child had autism, which is also a brain disorder I'd try everything I could to treat her . If my my child had a eating disorder (which is a brain disorder) I 'd treat it even if she felt happier eating food. I wouldn't let my child eat until she dies just because it makes her happier. when the brain sends a wrong messages to our body  we will try to fix it whatever it is the message about. If the Brain sends a wrong message: Eat more you are not full enough after you have eaten more than enough, it's a wrong message and you'll treat it. If my child had dyslexia I'd treat it. If my child had Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) I would treat it........Why when the brain sends a wrong message: "you're a girl even that you are in  a boy's body" people say it's normal it doesn't need treatment, we need to accept it . It's interesting  when it's about sex everything is normal and OK. Why not treat it like you would treat Any other brain disorder? I think I would never stop trying to find a cure  or a treatment if i had a child with any type of brain disorder or any other disease.
 
Replied By: sperph on Oct 21, 2009, 3:44PM
Hi Toni,
I watched the episode , Little Boy Lost,on Foxtel, Sydney, Australia, yesterday.
I had the very distinct impression you felt hijacked? That you were of the opinion that Dr Phil was going to discuss YOUR reaction and grief to 'losing" your son?
Instead of which ,the program turned into a debate about Transgenderism (for program ratings?) Then you were confronted with "experts" who drove you nuts because you were NOT there to discuss the decision itself,only its impact on you.
Am I right?
I have some comprehension of where you are at because I have 1 son who is homosexual and his younger brother ,who was autistic.(Also 3 daughters who are heterosexual and Neurotypical normal).
I understand the grief of "losing a son" while he is still alive. Compared to autism , being "gay" is a piece of cake ,by the way.
I have now recovered my son using DAN /Pfeiffer protocols . These are the same as Jenny McCarthy used for her son. My son now has friends, hobbies, will find employment and probably marry (well, as much chance as others!)
Yet, I have to sit and hear "experts" pontificate about "biological" being "untested, unproven" etc ......with THOUSANDS of recovered kids staring them in the face. I totally understand your frustration that ,just because 'they' have a university qualification , the parent is considered LESS expert than them!!!
As Karyn Seroussi (""Unravelling The Mystery of PDD and Autism") "I've found that an open minded parent can learn more in 6 months than a closed minded professional can learn in 20 years."
Trust your "instincts", intelligence-you earnt it the hard way, not as a mere outside observer!
Good lukh. God Bless
kerrie

 
Showing 1-10 of total 1023 Comments