Sign up for the Dr. Phil Newsletter
Twitter Facebook YouTube

2014 Shows

 
Amy admits she’s a “psycho, over-protective mom” of five children, ages 4 to 20, and worries that her behavior could be crippling her kids’ development. She admits to flossing her 20-year-old daughter's teeth, trimming her 15-year-old's toenails and doing her children's homework for them. Amy says she’s just trying to prevent her kids from being hurt or disappointed -- but is she really setting them up for failure? Amy’s 20-year-old pregnant daughter, Katelynn, says her mother’s overprotectiveness is out of control -- claiming that Amy has even threatened to gain custody of her unborn baby, to ensure the child is taken care of properly. And, Amy’s son, Robert, 15, says he’s suffering in school because his mom won’t let him do his own homework -- and he doesn’t even know what he’s good at, because she does everything for him. What's behind Amy’s “helicopter mom” habits? Find out what Dr. Phil uncovers from Amy’s past that may be contributing to her parenting style. Can she learn to take a step back and allow her kids to become independent? (OAD: 2-21-13)

Find out what happened on the show.
Comments
Replied By: upsydasy on Jun 19, 2014, 8:57AM - In reply to caitiej64

I was touched by this woman’s story too; who wouldn’t be.  I’m just a little frustrated by some commenters trying to control the conversation by accusing others of not having empathy for the guests on the show.   It is just as important, if not more so, to explore the mistakes that were made as it is to mollycoddle and flatter a person into perhaps remaining as they were.  Change is the key to living a better and more balanced life.  I don’t always agree with everything said on this message board, but I support everyone’s right to express their opinion especially when their comments are interlaced with a great deal of common sense, as alwaysaskeptic usually are, and NOT just based on self-deception.  Men are not at the root of all evil.  Women have just as much ownership in the choices, decisions as well as the actions that they take throughout their lives especially when they can affect their children, husbands and extended family.  In other words, if you won't or can't do it for yourself then do it for your loved ones, which is in my not so humble opinion, the most powerful motivator of all.

 
Replied By: caitiej64 on Jun 18, 2014, 10:58PM - In reply to alwaysaskeptic
People can have empathy for a mom that is struggling. That lady is trying to come to terms with her issues. She was real and honest. Hope the family heals and mom get's help. 
 
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Jun 18, 2014, 2:20PM - In reply to upsydasy
upsydasy, thanks for your comment. I too am tired of the "don't judge until you've walked a mile in their shoes" reactions. It seems that so many women immerse themselves in self-pity and become paralyzed, possibly encouraged by other women who point fingers only at men and forever coddle their "sisters", screaming "IT'S NOT THEIR FAULT!" Not every person who has experienced emotional trauma "checks out" and becomes demented. My own wife had an abusive, alcoholic father but she made the choice to not repeat her parents' mistakes, put herself through university earning three degrees and is a professional who is very accomplished in her field. She also has a delightful view of the world around her. People can and do overcome adversity every single day. Others choose to gaze at their navel and blame everybody else but they should accept at least part of the responsibility for that choice.
 
Replied By: alwaysaskeptic on Jun 18, 2014, 2:00PM - In reply to shahnster
It doesn't take long for a couple of teenagers to make a baby...perhaps Amy was too distracted flossing her 15 yr old son's teeth and doing his homework to notice her daughter was getting busy.
 
Replied By: shahnster on Jun 18, 2014, 10:38AM
How much of a helicopter mom could she be if her 16 year old had enough unsupervised time to get pregnant in the first place??????????
 
Replied By: banksoftheohio on Jun 18, 2014, 9:26AM
Dr. Phil and staff, thank you for booking this woman and her children for your show.  This kind of subject doesn't seem to be covered enough, yet it has meaning for many of us, all or in part.  I hope to see Amy improve through therapy--I think she can.  I can tell that she loves her children and her children love her, and they need to keep that bond.  If Amy continues her "helicoptering" she could alienate her children forever.  This show came right in time before that could happen.

This story touched me personally because it reminded me of a struggle I had with a former friend.  He had hidden issues from his youth (that I still do not know entirely) that he didn't deal with in a healthy way, and it seemed like he released the pain by being extremely controlling and/or clingy towards those who dared to get close to him.  He just had to keep order in his life through any way he knew how.  Of course like Amy's children I hated his behavior when he got like that and it drove me away, even while it hurt to leave.  After I left nothing changed and he still acted the same way towards others, in fact it seemed to get worse.  At first I blamed myself but now I know that his behavior was nothing I could control, otherwise I would become like he is.  The pieces have come together since then and I feel sorry for this guy who I was so angry at, but I don't think I'll ever be ready to be friends with him again.
 
Replied By: upsydasy on Jun 18, 2014, 8:00AM - In reply to alwaysaskeptic

The tendency to excuse mistakes is quite strong in many of these comments and I wonder if it’s just because certain participants relate to the guests a little too much sometimes and stubbornly refuse to acknowledge it.  Lately, any comment that begins or ends with “live or walk a mile in their shoes” reminds me of another saying: “De-Nile Ain’t Just a River in Egypt”. 

 
Replied By: stacie1961 on Jun 18, 2014, 12:13AM
The show today had me in tears. It was my life on there today with abuse & neglect.   I really wish I could know what you told her after the show. And my question to you is, When is it too late for moms like us?
 
Replied By: caitiej64 on Jun 17, 2014, 11:11PM
The more closely you hold your child, the break away is more severe. It could be acting out, an eating disorder, drugs, running away. Don't parent out of fear. I saw that happen with my older sister and my mom. It's a bummer that good intentioned moms do the wrong thing sometimes. 
 
Replied By: caitiej64 on Jun 17, 2014, 11:05PM
You are doing your best. We are human and not perfect. :)
 
Showing 1-10 of total 178 Comments