2013 Shows

(Original Air Date: 01/29/13) Juli, 41, has lost 150 pounds and says she loves the attention she gets from her new “smokin’ hot” body. The mother of two says she enjoys going to clubs and partying, but her husband, David, is less than impressed by her newfound lifestyle. David says he's embarrassed by Juli's carefree behavior and that ever since she’s slimmed down, she’s changed for the worse. He says he thinks Juli drinks too much, flaunts her body -- and confides that six months ago, she kissed another man at a bar. How does Juli explain that night? Can Dr. Phil get this marriage back on track? Then, hear from the couple’s two daughters -- Taylor, 21, and Gabrielle, 17. What do they say they want most from their mom? And, Dawn last appeared on Dr. Phil with her boyfriend, Paul, who said he wasn’t attracted to her “saggy skin.” How are Paul and Dawn now?

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: jennysgram on Aug 20, 2013, 10:19AM - In reply to julbug1
julbug1 -- So, if I'm understanding your sloppily-written comment correctly, because you earn a LOT of money, it justifies sex on demand.  Interesting that you'd bring money into play here!  It's also interesting that you appear to think you can speak for "most men".  If it's only sex, then I suppose you have a valid point.  Such a pity -- you sound so empty!
Replied By: upsydasy on Jul 25, 2013, 8:00AM - In reply to avreyjade
Reading your post really helped me put things into perspective.  I’m not overweight but I smoke and always feel annoyed by the people who plug their noses when they pass by me on the street (mostly women).  I never felt like a victim, but rather militant and combative due of their blatant rudeness.  I’d think to myself I have an addiction, so mind your own business and get over yourselves.  The ugly images cigarette companies are now forced to print on their packages made me want to thumb my nose at every nonsmoker even more. 

I’ve been smoking for 40 years and never really tried to quit.  But recently, I was given a great gift which made me reevaluate my life and how I treat my body.  I’ve always been blessed with perfect health and like you I was a very active child, but I took it all for granted and still do in many respects.  I suppose that I was waiting for a reason to quit - something to inspire me other than my health since as stated above, I’ve always enjoyed anyway.  Yet even after receiving a gift of a lifetime, I still hung on to my worst habit out of stubbornness and dare I say it: pride… urgh!

The other day I watched a documentary on PBS about Buddhism.  One of the interviewees (a Psychiatrist I believe) related a story that really resonated with me.  He talked about owning a beautiful glass and how it caught the light and shined stunning colors when held at a certain angle near a sunny window.  One day the glass was broken and as a good Buddhist he thought to himself, oh well nothing’s permanent.  At least he remembered to enjoy his glass and tended to it while it was still whole.  That story blew my mind and I thought there is the inspiration that I had been searching for.  My life is not permanent either and I must strive to take better care of myself and stop taking so many things for granted.

Your story is much the same.  You are beautiful, cultured, successful and supremely intelligent.  You were given wonderful gifts in life, but at a cost that many of us will never know.   My compassion goes out to you. 

Thank you for taking the time to post your courageous story.  I read it twice and probably will again just to be sure that I caught every line.

Replied By: psycman on Jul 25, 2013, 7:47AM - In reply to abamaman
I have been around certin relationships with friends wih a similar problem. Lots of people have thiercertain rquierments inorder to get in the mood for intamate.Some can just get in the mood right on the dot. Haray to them. Others need four play. Then thier are others who want to enjoy dinner, conversation and a little cuddeling.I understand that thier is a stereotype for males. Part of beng a man intales the fact that you a supposed to satisfy a womans every need and want. The is also a stigmatism that labels a male that cannot give his wife or girlfiend sex at any time is weak. My girlfriend and I have a mutual agreement to let ech other know when the other is becoming unhealthy. That is manly because we want to be together as long as possible. If the tides were turned I think Dr. Phils response might have benn diffrent. If a male is in a relationship with a lady it is not expected for the lady to have sex when ever the male asks for it.That sould be considered sexual harrassment or a form of abuse. The male would have been told in some fashion that s is not going to happen when ever you want it. 
Replied By: avreyjade on Jul 25, 2013, 12:45AM - In reply to soulangel
People like this make me so angry. This growing trend of holding such a "victim mentality" among overweight/obese people is beyond ridiculous.

Let's just skip the whole basic chemistry/physics "calorie in vs calorie out" equation that it is biologically impossibly for the human body to operate outside. 

You are NOT a victim of anyone other than yourself. Portion sizes, unhealthy food, lack of time to exercise - it's all BS/excuses. Of course, everyone knows this. It just irritates people who are overweight to be reminded of it, because they realize that no one else actually buys it either, and they can't act like victims any more.

If weight is your only problem - I will elaborate - if the biggest problem you have in your life is one that is 100% within your control - then you should be down on your knees thanking God that you are so lucky.

Those comments you listed - things you "do" and "don't" get asked. Why are you SO concerned with what you perceive to be the thoughts of everyone else around you? It's none of your business what anyone around you thinks. This is something that overweight people need to come to terms with. You one hundred percent and absolutely have the "right" to be overweight. It's no one else's concern. And you absolutely have the right to, subsequently, feel good (or bad, whatever you want) about yourself. And you cannot be lawfully discriminated against (in so far as it is possible to prevent) in many situations. But you absolutely do NOT have the right to dictate how the rest of the world must look at you. It is incredibly hypocritical that the overweight population believe they have the right not only to moan and complain constantly about BEING overweight, but also to attempt to spread the agenda that "everyone else must believe and accept that they are beautiful" as well, and "being overweight" must be etched in everyone's minds as being completely normal and acceptable.

And at the same time as trying to convince people of this, none of them believe it themselves. It's actually amazing how, as the overweight population has grown, so has the tendency to obsess over/worship "the perfect body", or the idea of being thin. The amount of exploitation taking place by "magic weight loss" programs within the overweight population is staggering. As if there is some magic diet, pill, spell, that will melt all your weight away over night. It's almost ridiculous to the point that if people are willing to believe it, fine, let them be scammed. What is painful about the situation is that the solution is so obvious. In fact, everyone knows it. Expend more than you consume. Without any exercise at all, this would shed weight. Few concepts could be simpler.

Western society needs to take a strong stance in favoring health and well being over politeness. You would never, ever refrain from encouraging diabetics to use insulin, "just in case it hurt their feelings to be called diabetic". These things are OBJECTIVE. If you are overweight, you are overweight. It's nothing anyone else has done to you or labelled you as. It is a numerical fact. If you interpret that as an insult - that says more about your own perception of weight than anyone elses. Society needs to advertise and promote real, scientifically supported healthy eating, and healthy weight. Because as much as heavy people would like to deny it, being overweight is flat out unhealthy. Now - you may not CARE about this (just as someone speeding may not care that THEIR driving behavior is risky), but that does not change the fact that your decision is medically detrimental. Rather than embracing a new "bigger" society, we need to press the importance (especially among children...seeing overweight children is widely agreed to be an incredibly sad and frustrating situation, and very unfair on the child) of maintaining healthy weight. It's not difficult. In fact, your body was made to be a certain weight. It will function beautifully within that range. It is not difficult to maintain your body within the proportion it was biologically intended for. 

The reason this topic is so frustrating to me is because of my own situation. My father is a surgeon and my mother a nurse, so we grew up very healthy and active. I was one of four children - I alone figure skated 5 days a week, played a musical instrument, took acting classes, and belonged to an abundance of after school clubs and activities. I was not alone - my siblings were in the same boat (although the activities varied). I don't remember ever having the TIME to gain weight growing up. And what would have been the fun in that? We were too busy swimming, or playing bike-tag, or running around playing tennis, dancing, playing soccer, baseball, whatever the kids on our block felt like that night. I couldn't imagine a more depressing childhood than being stuck in front of a television inside a body that couldn't be easily moved.

My family were all very lean, healthy. However, when I was 12 years old, I got incredibly sick, and I have been sick ever since. I'm 26 now but due to a lot of physical delays, I didn't grow once I got sick and so I have been 5'3 ever since, and have always looked significantly younger than I am. Having such a severe illness changes my perspective on everything, and when I am in the outside world, I almost cannot believe how shortsighted everyone has become. I rarely get breaks from this illness. I spend weeks at a time in the hospital. It took everything I had to make it through first one law degree, and then another (the first from the UK), at one of the top law schools in the country. I had to study for the LSATs in the hospital. I had to get a day-pass to be discharged for the day to go and WRITE the LSATs. I missed so much class in law school, I had to study almost everything on my own. I had to bring textbooks onto the inpatient unit, study while I was getting blood or medicinal transfusions, write papers and dissertations from a hospital bed - it was an incredibly hard struggle. My first contract with a law firm, one of the most prestigious law firms in my city, was draining. I was battling a disease relapse while working 10+ hours a day. When my contract finished, I spent a month in the hospital receiving intense medical therapy. I'm still working to recover.

I have had to battle SO much to get where I am. And although I cannot call this a curse - from the outside, I look perfectly healthy. I have a great tan, my hair falls in waves of blonde curls, my skin is unmarked, I have what (people call, and which I flinch at) "the perfect body". The perfect body, indeed. A body so at battle with itself, I spent 1/4 of my life in the hospital, and all my life unwell. But because I'm only 95 lbs, everyone gushes. You are so gorgeous! You look so beautiful! Oh, wow, you can wear ANYTHING and make it look good. Aren't you so lucky you can never find your size?? (I don't think so...). You're so lucky you never have to worry about your weight! You look so good!

I do worry about my weight, actually. I worry I can't maintain my weight at a relatively normal level, absorb adequate nutrients, maintain bone mass, and keep myself healthy enough to do the things I love to do (figure skate, act, travel). But I work at it, I try to eat as much as I can, in as high calorie methods as I can. And it's difficult, because food causes me a lot of pain and nausea, and is generally an unpleasant experience -  but I know I have to do it to have a somewhat healthy, enjoyable life.

The overweight population turning themselves into victims is the most dangerous trend I've seen. It takes the responsibility and culpability away from the very people who have it. It tells people they are powerless, when they are not. It causes a problem with an easy solution to turn into an epidemic of individuals absolving themselves of accountability at their own expense. It is also incredibly offensive. Overweight people seem to feel they have the market cornered when it comes to being offended. Well, it is offensive to every legitimately SICK person in the world for you to consider yourselves victims. People with REAL disorders - REAL diseases - believe me, if they were told they could cure themselves through simple lifestyle changes - it would be cause for tears of joy and celebration. If someone told me losing weight was the cure to my problems - I would be singing from the rooftops. Because then it WOULD be in my control. It wouldn't be a progressive illness that I have no control over, spreading havoc through my life, leaving me distorted with pain, throwing up, with arms bruised from elbow to wrist as a result of 9 unsuccessful IV pokes, stuck in a hospital ward, with no feeling of confidence that I will ever have my life back, and no feeling of security that I will even have a life for as long as one might expect to. THAT is a situation someone doesn't have control over. THAT is a scary situation. Being overweight just can't compare. And no matter how loudly you exclaim it - you are not victims.

And if you don't like the remarks you get as an overweight person...with the population steadily increasing in weight...and as slim body types becomes increasingly rare - you should hear the number of underhanded and vindictive comments WE receive. 


Replied By: abamaman on Jul 24, 2013, 10:09PM
I don't watch Dr. phil, but a co worker called me today and told me to watch todays show. After a few minutes i knew why! I am a cop also I married the love of my life, we have been together for 10 years. after the birth of our child she gained some weight, but i loved her just the same. She went from slim and sexy to what i thought was curvey and sexy. but she felt the need to lose weight and she encouraged me to do the same, i would do anything for my wife. we bagan slow and i lost my weight pretty fast, but she had problems and went to her doctor for help. my wife lost close to 50 lbs i was so happy for her. then the problems began she began to show off her body, i was fine with it because i thought she was so sexy. then she got carried away and began to want other men and did not care if i knew about it. this has been going on for over a year, i have caught her telling other men she loves them, had her tell me she is only with me because of our child. once i catch her talking to other men she never says sorry, and will just say that she loves me and will stay with me. I just don't know what to do, i love her but i guess she is just to hot for me now. she is always on facebook, always on her phone, she hides her phone from me.
Replied By: samsnewplace on Jul 24, 2013, 7:18PM
There is little to no tolerance in the USA for the heavy, fat, obese folks who live here. Just try walking down a street and watch the looks of disgust, try going to eat out with friends and have people scrutinize what you order. One thing American people need to understand is there are people who have medical issues, such as a thyroid problem that adds to your weight issues. For one moment before you glare, roll your eyes or ignore the "heavy" folks, be glad and thankful you don't have to deal with medical issues that relate to your weight because there is zero tolerance for fat people.....I should know, I am one and yes I take meds for a thyroid problem. It's not always due to excessive eating or lack of exercise.
Replied By: mombergerr on Jul 24, 2013, 5:12PM - In reply to mmongoven
I could not agree more than what this person is trying to say but no one opposing the Zimmerman verdict wants to listen.

I am appalled that Dr. Phil would take the side of the Martin family's distractors because he is afraid to call it what it really is.  I feel he is afraid of the african/american people because of what people like Al Sharpton and other trouble makers will do to his show and sponsers.  When you take the side of those that are so wrong about this case and have the education that you have and can't see that justice was given to George Zimmerman, you are insulting the justice system itself.  I know Dr. Phil's program is important and success depends on ratings but Dr. Phil needs to practice what he preaches on his own program and that is be honest about the facts and talk about all the facts.  I am not saying that Trayvon Martin and his family need to be trashed but just tell the truth about the situation.  Dr. Phil is causing, like all other news organizations, desension and racial tension by having this bias talk on TV.  Black people are creating their own problems with other races by acting like such cry babies and think everyone owes them something and what is that?  This political correctness in our society has gone overboard and is a bunch of crap.  America is held hostage to those that want to cry foul for every little thing that is called racist. 

It is very dishearting to know that a young man lost his life in such a tradgic situation but the facts can not be ignored.  He was not a child.  He was probably more like a man child.  He was big and mature physically and no doubt immature mentally or he would be alive today. It is absurd to say that his only defense was a can of tea and a bag of skittles.  Why can't people understand the facts and why does Dr. Phil have to allow people to come on his program and voice their unsubstaniated opinions like the prosecutors did and not understand that the only facts, and I repeat only facts, were brought to this case by the defense. Use common sense Dr. Phil, instead of playcating to people like Al Sharpton and his trouble makers and call it what it is.  The only people on this earth who have the right to believe that justice was not served and have hatred towards George Zimmerman, until forgiveness touches their  hearts, is the family of Trayvon Martin.  Everyone else should be ashamed of them selves for insulting the intelligence of the American people and the best justice system in the world.  Dr. Phil, you are part of that group, and I am shocked that you would sell out your integrity in order to avoid back lash from a group of morality thugs and the real racist in this country.  Other races did not protest when O.J. was acquitted.  That tells me a lot about African/American insecurity and over sensativity and I only mean the ones that give the rest of them a bad name.  There are many wonderful Black people in this land and thank God it is the majority and I have them in my own family as a son in law and 3 black grandchildren so it would be nice if Dr.Phil would not be part of promoting bad feelings between our races by having a program where he shows bias against Mr. Zimmerman and the justice he received and a disregard for all the facts in this very unfortunate and very tragic thing that happen and some one lost their life and now a family suffers and we want to keep it alive so the families on both sides can not heal.

Dr. Phil, you think you are always right about everything and I can only say SHAME, SHAME ON YOU!!!

I know it is not any thing to you but I am just this meaningless person with an opinion and I will have a very hard time to every watch your program again and I know you could care less but at least I feel better now that I have expressed my feelings.

If you ever read this I thank you for your time. If not, it is what it is.

Robert M.
Replied By: bristol12 on Jul 24, 2013, 4:06PM
Just read your message from January.....you truly need to realize that your "man" is very vein and once you have this baby, you had better pray that you shrink back up.  Don't bank your self esteem on a man that does not look deeper than the "skin".

Replied By: latherings on Jul 24, 2013, 3:41PM
The lady said that losing the weight was a near death experience for her. 

She thought that losing weight would change how she feels (horribly depressed) and it did not. Her behvaior is a desperate attempt to find the happiness she was expecting to find from the weight loss. She needs not chastizement but serious help with her emotional problems so she can get the self esteem that she lost the weight in order to obtain.
Replied By: lhdelaune on Jul 24, 2013, 3:13PM
What makes her think that when she gets pregnant with this man, he won't again find her "repulsive" because she will gain weight, and may not lose it all when the baby is born and unfortunately, I think maybe your skin may not be as pliable after you have the skin and muscle surgery.   I think she's in for a big surprise, and living in a fantasy world that this surgery has solved all her problems with him.
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