If he has an "illness" called alcoholism, the girlfriend needs to make a choice to look after herself. We need to stop giving adults and excuse to act like animals by giving them an "illness" label...I'd say the girlfriend has an illness to be sticking around him when she wouldn't be putting up with anyone else treating her badly. Self preservation is the key. My father had an "illness" called alcoholism too and he chose it over his family who he obviously did not love more than a drink...it's the same with that guy- no illness.

My brother was and still is violent like that man. He burnt my possessions out of jealousy and would hit me or throw things at me when I walked past him. My mother would tell me to stay away from him and to not make him angry (like it was my fault). In the end I went to the police station and filed a report against him because he pushed my head into a metal chimney while a fire was going in the fireplace. He also had threatened to kill me and he had a gun (which he didn't have a licence for). I also told the police about the gun. After I made the report (and even to this day over 15yrs later) my mother was and is angry at me and she paid his fines for him- she also blames me because he "can't get a drivers licence because he got a criminal conviction"- I'm sorry, he doesn't have his licence because he is too lazy and reliant on my mother for everything (she still pays his way and drives him everywhere like a slave). I hope those people don't enable their son until he is almost 40 like my brother.

Dr. Phil, I have always taped your shows and have loved watching you help others, but lately I just cannot watch your treatment of some of your guests. Yes, they may be doing something wrong with how they are raising their children but you rolling your eyes and mimicking their comments is making me delete the show. It is happening so much. I always found you so compassionate but lately it seems like you think you are so smart and everyone else is so stupid..I just can't watch anymore. I felt so bad for Stephen's parents today with how you treated them...it's like you build them up, "Oh I know how you feel" and then you practically make fun of their comments! They are adults and to me they just looked like belittled and beat down little people when you were done...

I was so upset watching the show about Stephen that aired this week. (I DVR all your shows so I'm just watching now. I was married to THAT guy, he just existed in a different body. I started dating him at 15 and didn't gain the courage to leave until I was 27Loop plinth at Stephen all I could see was my ex husband. I believe he was saying what he thought you wanted to hear.People like that at that age rarely change. He did to me and said to me and my son just about everything Stephen does. It all stemmed from his upbringing. Much like Stephen he "ran the show" as a teen in his parents home and did the same in our home when we were married. Sadly he has turned to my children as targets and has even hone so far as to hold my 15 year old daughter down and repeatedly punched her in the back. DCYF said the "accusation" was unfounded even with photos and statements. Stephen is a sick, mean, manipulative person. I can't count the times my ex would say -"I wasn't thinking" or " I blacked out" "I love you"all while sobbing uncontrollably. I was concerned that his relationship with his GF wasn't addressed because I'm certain that girl is taking the brunt of his abuse anem empty apologies.My ex would also say things like- I'm going to kill you and feed you to the pigs (we had a farm @ the time) or say he would bury my remains in our yard. I am truly frightened for ANYONE in Stephen's life. I have lived it.

I know just how you feel. We have a 26 year old living at home. He is employed and does fairly well at work. But he has the temper tatrums and is very immature. I know what Dr Phil means when he says we let him stay because it makes us feel better. Here is my problem.. he has ASD. Autism Spectrum Disorder. Asperger's which is now gone from  the ASD list. Sometimes he does things that he just can't help and other times he is just a jerk...jokingly I tell him, this is you being an asshole, not Asperger's, but it is the truth. He has no common sense or anykind of descion making skills, oh and money is just to be spent, doesn't think about his phone bill, car payment, or God forbid give us something for food and rent. I know we did this, but growing up I knew he was different, finally at 17 we got the diagnois of Asperger's. Where DO you go for help. He is not violent and I do not fear him, but I am afraid for his future. We would like to retire in the near future but with him still at home that doesn't look possible.

I DVRd this program so my husband and I could watch it together.   Stephen IS OUR SON, down to the language and threats he uses against us.  Our son has done all of what Stephen has done.  Our story parallels theirs completely.  The only difference is that we did tell him he is not allowed to treat us this way and did send him on his way.  We are heartbroken that we have no contact with him.  


My frustration with your program is that we don't have the means to send our son to the same evaluation place in Texas.


Please, Dr. Phil, tell us what to do if we don't have access to your facilities.  We have gone down the counseling/ psychiatrist/ meds/ behavior modification roads.  Our son hasn't been helped by any of this.  (Please know we believe everyone we have dealt with has tried to help - just not the right match.)


For those of us who can't afford all the medical help, please give us your "Plan B". 

I've got nothing against drinking -- it's one of the few God given talents I have -- but Justin needs to learn that alcohol just isn't for him. And Jessica needs to learn that drinking doesn't excuse his behavior. 

Know how many times my wife and I have screamed at each other? Called each other a name? Thrown empty vodka bottles? Called the police? Hit one another? Either drunk or sober? None. Zero. Zip.


the two of you are obviously not good for each other. Bail out while you still have a chance, and before that kid is screwed up for life. What you're going through? It's not normal, it's not a bump, it's not something to work out. It's something to run like hell from.

From my perspective what I see is merely "payback" from a entitled generation!  I wasn't a stellar parent, but my kids all had jobs as soon as they were old enough - did their homework before TV - did their own laundry and out at 18 either off to college or on their own.  I REQUIRED more of them early on and they did well and I take NO credit for it.....just did what I thought right.

We have tried so many psychologists and psychiatrists.  The Mental Health system is broken.....we have been trying to get him proper help since he was young.  No-one sees him in crisis for the most part except us.  Unfortunately at his age now he has to ASK for help and that just won't happen.  When we have had to call the police and he has been brought to the hospital it is only a matter of time before they say he is ok to come home.  He is very good at acting like he is perfectly normal.  We don't believe that jail is the answer - we know he needs help.  Mental help.  thank you for your comments.....it is somewhat comforting to know we are not alone out here.

While I do not know him personally, I had a cousin exactly like this.  He was a great kid, he came from a middle class family. Like Steven, he would have rage incidents so bad he would actually black out.  Like you, we never thought that he would kill his parents.  But, on November 18, 2010 - my cousin took a 9MM glock and killed his parents, his girlfriend and  himself.  The note he left basically said 'all they had to do was give me the car keys.'  To this day, we all Monday-morning quarterback. So this episode touched me deeply.