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Family

 
Have your loved ones shown you the true meaning of the word "family" with their actions? Or, is there a rift in your family that has gone on too long? Share your stories and solutions.
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Replied By: bumpygirl57 on Feb 8, 2016, 12:36PM
On 12-28-15, my Son and his wife came to our home for Christmas. Had a great night. The next morning, my Son and his Wife went to a local store to look around. They left their 2 dogs with myself and my Husband. One is a small lovable mutt. The other a 100+ pound pit bull mix. We already have 2 dogs. A small pom and a medium cockapoo. The cockapoo RARELY comes into view during their visits. On this particular day, the pom came into the living room and went to get on the love seat with me. The pitbull was sitting on the loveseat with me. In the blink of an eye, the pitbull attacked the little pom. It was only after my husband struck the pitbiull repeatedly did he left go of the pom. I managed to wrap her in a towel and get her out of harms way. My husband called my son and daughter in law to get home. They thought he was teasing !! Once they got back, my son wanted a gun and "one bullet". We refused to help him and insisted that he help me get the pom to the Vet. I was in no shape to drive !!! My son, screamed and cursed at me and blamed the pom for the attack. When he saw the critically injured pom he had to leave the room. He cale back in and said he was on his way to get the pit to be euthanised. He went back to our home and sent his shy, meek wife (who weighs less than the pit) back to the Vets with the pit. My husband came in his car since she had no idea where to go. He came in and stayed with me during the death of our little dog ( She was my Mothers dog. Mother dies about 21 months ago). The Vet refused to euthanize the dog UNLESS and UNTIL my Son signed the consent. SO, I asked the Vet to at the very least to crate the pit and give us time to go home and for them to make a decision. Of course, my Husband and I were sure of our opinion as to what needed to happen. My son loaded up their car while I was showering off the blood. He hugged me, said "Momma I can't kill my dog". They left and he has not spoke to me since. He is my only living child out of 6 pregnancies. Not only am I grieving the death of an innocent dog , I am grieving for the loss of my relationship with my son, daughter in law and my 2 granddogs. The Vet told them that if they chose NOT to euthanize, they need to NEVER allow him in the house again. He should be rehomed into a pit resuce or if they keep him, he need to be kept in a very secure pen. They chose to ignore what had happened. They took him home and went back to life as they know it. They are wanting to have a baby. I am so very scared for the future of my grandchildren, other kids in the neighborhood and the list goes on and on. I feel totally broken hearted. I never thought my son would choose to not speak to me ever ! Hoping for answers ??????
 
Replied By: nlawson on Jan 25, 2016, 10:28AM - In reply to bones33
Intead of picking up your drug addicted sister and taking her to "mom's" why not take her to the laundramat and tell her  you'll be back in an hour and a half or however long it takes.
 
Replied By: jcwright on Jan 21, 2016, 4:30PM

I am going to write this piece in as short and readable as possible. This story is about my family, where I have just become aware of the terrible events that have taken pace in my early life. This may be helpful for those who have experienced the same burdens, and to show they are not alone in this world, and there are those who have been through the same hell.


 


Let’s start by expressing that not all parents love their children. My Bio-Mother was a victim of terrible sexual abuse at the hands of her Father. Her Mother did nothing to protect her children from her husband. My Grandmother used the “put my head in the sand approach” along with blaming the children victims in dealing with the great wrong that was done to my Bio-Mother and her sisters. Hence, my Bio-Mother came into her own Motherhood very damaged.


 


Let's move forward in years…my Bio-Mother married a very good man, and they had two daughters. Well, I expressed in the last paragraph that my Bio-Mother was very damaged, and accordingly the marriage did not last. My Bio-Mother became a single mother with a one year old and a three year old. She had no skills in which to support her children. Yes, my Father did pay child support, but it was not enough.


 


Some time passes…………………………….


 


Next, my Bio-Mother hooks up with a man (let’s call him Steve), where I am sure that he promised her that he would just take care of all of my Bio-Mother’s problems. Next thing I know, he and she rented a house together and then my hell on this planet began.


 


Steve also had a brother (let’s call him George) they both were Satanists, and they chose my Bio-Mother because she had two daughters. These men along with my Bio-Mother started ritualistic child abuse along with sexual abuse in grooming my sister and I to be sacrificed to Satan. Additonally, demons possessed my Bio-Mother and these men, and the demons tormented us as children by pulling our hands and feet while we were in bed sleeping. I am not going into the details of what these men and my own Mother did to us, but I can tell you that evil people can make hell right here on this earth.


 


Miracle……………………………………….


 


My sister and I suffered years of abuse at the hand of these people, and my Father petitioned the Court for custody and won (this took many years). But I want to tell you of the miracle that occurred in my sister and my life. After another episode of being hit so hard across the face that I fell down and knocked down my sister…I ran to my bedroom and prayed that God “to take it all away”. God said that we were God’s children, and we would not have to put up with this nightmare much longer. My memory had been completely wiped clean of those events, and my Father had custody of us within 3 days. Our room for those next three days became a haven, and nobody bothered us again including the demons.


 


Many years pass……………………………………..


 


I am 53 years old, and I cannot say everything has been perfect, but I have a wonderful life. I remember what my Bio-Mother has done to us, but I do not want it to destroy my life. My Bio-Mother’s life has been destroyed. She has no relationship with her daughters or grandchildren. She left Satanism, but it has never left her. At this point, she is completely demon possessed and they have been running her life ever since.


 


For those that have been through this crap, I hope it helps. You are not alone.

 
Replied By: pricklypear on Jan 21, 2016, 2:43PM
Hello, I will be brief here because I use a public computer and have to budget my time. At home I use a cheap smartphone that can't handle a site this big (I tried) and so I am limited to when I come into town to use the library computers.

I almost got accepted into your show over the topic of siblings abuse or something similar, but my lowtech lifestyle and my extremely undependable cel connection was so exasperating to your producer that she dropped it. I decided I am probably too old (60's) for it to matter, but really it does matter. For one thing, my younger brother and I actually comforted ourselves at my mother's funeral that we may both get some peace because we are 12 years younger than my extremely narcissistic eldest sister, but that thought no longer comforts me. For one thing, she has trained one of her daughters as a replacement, and for another, all our nieces and nephews have been scarred and many too young to know why this family has been so self-destructive.

I was just going over some Facebook notes that I put up when my daughter died in 2010 at age 34, of a so-called suicide (there are honestly more than just emotional issues for me to believe it was homicide. I have been told by a friend experienced as an RN who assisted ME's in Texas that the rush-to-judgement was questionable, in her opinion). I blame my sister for her death for many reasons. There is a note in my FB ages that is copies of correspondence between my daughter and me two years before she died.

I know you have issues with technology as far as deciding how expensive a guest might be, and I have tried to get to a better tech level so we can video-share, but my budget falls short. In fact, my friend actually tried to send me a tablet to facilitate better communication but it was stolen and she is still waiting for compensation from the delivery company. If you (Dr Phil staff) want to take the time to look at the material I have in Facebook (it is not public, of course, so I will have to hear from you first) maybe you will reconsider dropping this.

What I think it would accomplish is clearing the deck for the younger generation so that they won't be intimidated  by my sister's children, one of whom definitely has inherited her mother's personality and has devoted herself to carrying on against the rest of us. My sister's probable mental illness of Narcissistic Personality Disorder was described to me by a family psychologist who was trying to arrange a meeting with family over the abuse. He said she was severe or malignant, and said it was beyond the usual. This is a disorder that clearly runs in my family, and I was in therapy for having been raised in it. I accepted narcissistic abuse as normal and married a narcissist as a result. That same psychologist had to deal with my sister's pressure when she found out what he was trying to do (get a professional meeting with my parents and other relatives). That was years ago. I have letters and records from that doctor, who wrote to the court in my behalf. My sister was trying to assist my potheaded exhusband to take custody (ultimately to go to her from him) by calling me paranoid. That doctor wrote a letter to the court saying my "paranoia" was "reality-based". Then he faced an office visit from her, threatening lawsuits. He told me my family operated "like a cult!" .

Anyway, I hope that somehow I can solve the tech communication problem. I check in on computer about once a week, so please be patient with me :)







 
Replied By: fr3sc90 on Jan 20, 2016, 1:00AM
I feel unhappy because nobody in my family asks me what's wrong, never say I love you to me in a long time... I have no love, no support from anybody and feeling left-out.
 
Replied By: justme51 on Jan 11, 2016, 5:15AM
I cannot find out what happened after the show. I am refering to the step-daughter that lied alot and the off the wall step-dad.
 
Replied By: jcwright on Jan 6, 2016, 5:58PM - In reply to no1momma80
I was having the same problem, so I did no marry until all the kids were grown. We dated for 10 years. There is no Brady Bunch in real life.
 
Replied By: no1momma80 on Dec 30, 2015, 6:39PM
Hello. I have been married for 2 yrs now. We have a blended family. I have 2 boys he has 2 girls. Things are really starting to fall apart and I don't know what to do anymore. The biggest thing we fight about is the kids. We can't seem to get on the same page. We have 2 very diff ways of raising the kids. I feel his kids get away with alot and are spoiled and he thinks that about my kids and we fight. I don't know what to do. I do love him so much. He is a good guy but our marriage is falling apart. Please help.
 
Replied By: emmita on Dec 29, 2015, 1:25PM - In reply to lizzy_chaos
Hi lizzy, you've already gotten a whole bunch of replies, so I just want to tell you, the dynamic of your story is pretty much a copy of mine. It has been, and still is, very difficult for my mind to accept the idea that I have been so "marginalized" by my own family. Especially when you talk about having several health issues (I presume that you could use some help with yourself) and being so driven to conform to expectations of your family's method of operation that others' Christmas presents are more important than your own health and well being. THAT SHOULD NOT BE HAPPENING!!. 

I have come to realize that the only person I am entirely responsible for is me. Right now I am facing the excruciating dilemma of having to choose between babysitting my grandson (which is my only contact with him) and literally preserving my emotional sanity due to the same crazy-making expectations (and/or the lack of them) my family has for me.

Please know, lizzy, that even in your extreme situation, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!

Emmita
 
Replied By: lizzy_chaos on Dec 21, 2015, 4:43AM
hello 


ok so il start from the beginning...


growing up i was always quiet always hung out with my mum like i was always with her. out of the kids there is my sister brea (28) Me (26) brother Tyler (23) Robert (17) Tash (11)... My brother Tyler is inproson as i write this because i couldnt get him into a rehab i pretty much said u have to go and do some crime to get in there i couldnt rehabilitate him on my own and my family turned their back on him to the point i took him to hospital because emergency told me to as police showed up and he lost his shit at them i called my mum & dad and said like i need your help they told me there was nothing they could do to help him and hung the phone up on me.. Tyler and myself are the closest by far.. So recently brea started a fight with tylers girlfriend over my mum going to see him when mum was having her kids brea only had to go 10 minutes up the road but she always "needs a break from her kids " she had 2 hours to do this instead of going she had a tantrum... Tylers girlfriend messaged me so i messaged brea and said thers no issue just stop being a drama queen so brea was saying how tyler isnt mums only child but wait a sec my mum cant come to my house because shes always got brea's kids and when we do organise something its always cancelled because mumbas to have breas kids if she doesnt theres a huge fight..
It all turned into a war litrally she was throwing low blows at me and i was saying the truth...
I was then told that im no longer allowed to have anything to do with her kids the next day mum text me and told me i was mental and i need help all because i told my sister the truth. So not only am i not allowed to see the kids she has taken my whole family to her side the dark side becaise they are all scared they wont be able to see the kids...
Tyler's only concern is me out of this whole thing because im not well and have alot of health issues this has only made me depressed as brea's partner has messaged my parter telling him that they are having a family dinner at christmas. kind of like he was trying to rub it in ive brought the kids christmas presents even though it was the only money i had as i havent been working due to my health i have no money what so ever not even for my medication but i know if i dont buy for them it will be another screaming match because im a shit person.
Not one of them give a crap that im unwell my mum even dumped her horse on me.
I honestly just feel like i actually dont know what to feel im just numb by it all... how can one 28 year olds tantrum get me disowned by a whole family
 
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