Gay/Lesbian Support

Sexual orientation used to be something kept hidden from family and co-workers, but now, more and more people are "coming out" and finding acceptance. But for some families, accepting that their child is gay still presents challenges. Have you revealed your sexuality and found love and support? Or, are those close to you having a difficult time accepting your lifestyle? Share your story.
Replied By: onfire4jc4 on Jan 8, 2017, 3:08AM
I was raised in a Christian household. I am in fact married and have been so for 13 years now. However, I am also attracted to women and think about what having a relationship with a woman would be like every single day. I feel a tremendous amount of guilt for the way I feel and half of me thinks I will wind up in hell for my feelings, even though I have never been with a woman physically. Also, I don't want to hurt my husband or my family and I know that if I came out to them they would not accept it. Any ideas on what to do?
Replied By: jimmycc88 on Dec 12, 2016, 9:17AM
i am a 57 year-old gay man living alone struggling with HIV/AIDS for 26 years. My parents are deceased, and when they were alive, they were never supportive of my being gay or being positive. They were from a generation that only viewed being gay as being perverted or wrong. It was nearly impossible to talk about it with them and I only confronted the subject 2 times in my adult life with them. Nothing ever changed and I never felt any good feelings from them about being gay. We only got along as long as I said nothing and lived in a closet. 

Mom and dad are both dead now, but I have one sister that I have been close to for all of my life. She, again, is a devout, strict Catholic and is not at all supportive of my being gay or positive. All these years have been spent in silence never discussing my point of view, because she considers it wrong or unfathomable. I'm at my wits end and so tired of living this way, always in her shadow of judgement and disapproval.

I have very few friends in the gay community and live an isolated life. I know this isn't right either but I wish things were different, but I have no idea how to change other people's critical opinions. I just feel completely defeated!

Any advice would be appreciated.
Replied By: jjdach02 on Sep 17, 2015, 4:10PM
I just realized I like women recently but I am afraid that my family will not accept me. I already feel like I dont belong as it is and I feel like this will make me not belong even more.
Replied By: bluebbugs on Jul 17, 2014, 10:28AM - In reply to mountainwoman1
speaking as a mom of a gay son. It was a surprise to find out. my husband and I went to counseling for a year to help us cope. It has been13 years since he told us. We have a wonderful relationship with him and his partner, I am so blessed to have them in my life. Being raised a Baptist, it was a shock. But now I know I had to go through that so I might be able to help someone else understand that they are our children that God gave us. We love them unconditional. It is life not always perfect, it can be messy. But I would not change it, for I have so many blessing in my life. Hope this helps other Mothers who are stuggling with facing a gay or lesbian child. Love them endlessly, give them more hugs and more understanding.
Replied By: mountainwoman1 on Apr 13, 2014, 4:01AM - In reply to kenz1256
Give your mom some time. Parents create visions of what they want their children's futures to look like and it takes some getting used to when those visions are altered. Just give her time. Who knows? Maybe soon she'll be embarrassed by the way she reacted.
Replied By: mountainwoman1 on Apr 13, 2014, 3:56AM - In reply to chico1969
You do realize that your wife's lesbian boss does not represent all lesbians, don't you? Just like if her boss was a straight man and cheated with your wife, it wouldn't mean that all straight men are pigs, would it? Because that would mean you're a pig, and that wouldn't be a fair assumption. There are people with crappy morals in every community, but you shouldn't damn the whole community.

It sounds like you're in a lot of pain and when people are in pain sometimes they're angry at the wrong party. Though your wife's boss crossed a boundary (which is her company's issue to address), YOUR wife cheated on YOU. You should be putting your marriage under the microscope, not the LGBT community.
Replied By: kjszyszka on Feb 22, 2014, 9:27PM
We as straigaht spouses also need support. I would like the show to support us by putting on the founder of Straight Spouse Network, Amity Pierce Buxton.

Karen Szyszka
Replied By: mombrock on Jun 28, 2013, 6:01PM - In reply to tllsilk
Lack of character has nothing to do with sexual orientation.  Her boss crossed a line because she is self-centered and lacks moral standards.  Some heterosexuals also have the same issues.  It all depends on the individuals moral code - what they choose to live by.
Replied By: DrPhilBoard1 on May 20, 2013, 6:28AM
Let's remember to address the topic without personally attacking another member because their views are different from yours. We all can learn a lot from everyone's viewpoint, let's try to keep this discussion progressing in the manner intended. Thanks.
Replied By: josh4321 on May 8, 2013, 1:53AM - In reply to tllsilk
tilsilk is in italics
Josh4321 is in bold

I truly understand your distress, however, the same applies to heterosexuals who find someone of the opposite sex attractive and doesn't care that the person they are desiring is married.

I completely agree.

How does a gay person play into THAT scenario? Disrespect of the sanctity of marriage is not sexuality specific, and the pain from the invasion is the same no matter what, who, or why.

Again I agree, I don't think adultery is sexual orientation specific.

I's happiness is never determined by the definition or idea of another's happiness. Happiness is and ALWAYS will be the product of self-fulfillment (with moral boundaries, of course).

How do you arrive to that conclusion?  Do you think the only way for me to be happy is to appease my sexual desires?
I believe those who look to their sexual desires for happiness will end up in despair.
Note: thank you note to admin/moderator's for allowing my posts to remain. 
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