Adoption

 
Have you adopted a child or are you considering adoption? Or, were you adopted? Have you fostered a child? Did you place a child for adoption and are you eager to reach out to him or her? Share your stories and support for others.
Comments
Replied By: psalm10720 on Feb 19, 2016, 7:58PM
I was adopted at age 3 months and am grateful for the family I was adopted into. I wanted to share my own experience. One component of my adopted family was my parents were old enough to be grandparents. Wonderful people and happy with each other which provided a loving and stable environment. The only thing missing was discussions of things like "feelings, emotions, relationships, sex and other such topics. My parents were born in the late 1910's. I feel privelaged in many ways to have lucked out bit in others I did not have the type of relationship to develop emotional closeness. I started some bad coping ways as a young child because I had no one to talk to about these things and my parents were very "laid back" when it came to discipline. An adopted child starts life with a sense of rejection thinking there is something wrong with them to cause them to be left for adoption. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with adoption or adoptees but it's a natural cause and effect of who an adoptee is. I want to encourage any adopter to develop a close emotional relationship and talk about these different things with your adopted child.
 
Replied By: kellilensley on Feb 15, 2016, 1:15PM - In reply to amazic
Yes I would love to help you with your decision.  There are tons of loving people in the world that would take care of your child.  Remember you have wonderful options of having an open/closed adoption.  Depending on the state you live in.  Please reach out if you have any questions.
 
Replied By: kellilensley on Feb 15, 2016, 1:12PM
My husband and I have been foster parents for some time.  I have had to give back 4 children to a system that is not perfect.  Over a year ago we were given the blessing to adopt our foster child.  This was a blessing and answered prayer for us.  I have a strong feeling about your show that aired in my area last week.  I took some time to pray for my response, which was needed.  Dr. Phil I felt you didn't give a fair shake to foster parents.  Believe you me, that there are some foster parents that are in it for the money, and that sickens me.  We do receive a paycheck for taking care of a child, but that doesn't even pay what is needed.  I can't count the many tears I shed over the years handing back a child.  I also had many waken nights, wondering if our little girl would be taken as well.  Media has never given a good light to foster parents, but most of us our out doing this deed with no thank you.  I am not asking for a thank you, just asking that more be done with media to shed light on this issue.  YOU have a wonderful opportunity to shed this said “light”.  I feel for every right minded foster mother.  I have had my little girl for over a year, and there isn't a time that I don't scan every place we go.  There is never a picture of my child online, which I feel people don't realize the issues around parading your child online.  This is hard with family, since most people don't see this as an issue.  I pray every night and thank God for his blessing.  You see we too were unable to have a natural child, adoption was our only choice.  We also didn't have over $40,000 to spend to get a child through adoption.  This was our only course of action.  Please, Please bring more to this issue and cover this topic again.  You have the chance to change the future, one child at a time.  I would love to share my story with you or anyone who will listen.  Of course no pictures of my little girl. You know. ;)

Thank you,

Kelli

 
Replied By: vixonlady21 on Oct 19, 2015, 3:09PM - In reply to amazic
Yes,I adopted my son many years ago,he was six weeks old when we got him,now in his senior years he has given me 3 lovely grandchildren,lots of pleasure and laughter,and I would do it all over again if I had to do it.
 
Replied By: amazic on Jun 26, 2015, 6:19AM
Is adoption really a bad thing? I am 19 and thinking about giving my child up for adoption if the child is not my boyfriends because if it isn't I was raped and its my rapist's. I'm not looking for sympathy just so everyone knows.
 
Replied By: crystaltowry83 on Apr 29, 2015, 12:01PM
im trying to find my nieces prescilla lenda gonzalez 9/24/2002 and corrina lynn gonzalez 10/30/2006


their were taken after easter 2009 . their dad was accusted of molesting my daughter the night before easter


so cps advise my sister to leave that part of the county she did then he came to see me and my son was just a couple days old prescilla was so excited to see her cousin well they left my house and i never them again cps took them from the local walmart parking lot anyways i know he did it he got convinted of child molestion wel the girls got taken and the exwife of the predator got my nieces then she had a boyfriend living with her he had got deported so my nieces went to the state foster care its been 6 years i want to find them . my sister thinks one of them is dead and i have searched anywhere but nothing and she thinks that the oldest is living in an instituation psychological institution i keep thinking about the last time she told me i love you aunt crystal you know im alot like you. i use to help her with her homework. please help me find out how i can locate them.
 
Replied By: smiles7 on Apr 20, 2015, 2:49PM
hi i am looking for my son who was born april 10 1972 in georgia.
 
Replied By: afinn1977 on Apr 16, 2015, 8:06PM - In reply to cwells031
Yes she is. It takes a very selfless mother with a deep love for her child.
 
Replied By: afinn1977 on Apr 16, 2015, 7:01PM - In reply to oregonmum
I have never seen a Dr Phil show that gives this idea of foster care.  My husband and I used to foster and have also adopted. Foster care is no place for any child...sorry. there are more abusive homes than good homes. Your home and my home may be an exception to this but I have seen too much happen to kids in foster care that was much worse than what they were removed from. So, foster care is a negative thing, maybe not to you or I because we know that we're in it for the right reasons. For the child in any instance it is a huge change and scary. It is a negative thing because ultimately a family is being pulled apart and a child subjected to another trauma. Because rather they are abused or not, that is the normal they have known and now strangers are taking them away and they are with people they don't know. Whether we agree with how the child is treated that is their known family and should never be made to feel that the people in that family is bad but that the actions they chose to take was bad because that is where they came from. This is their gene pool and if you make their family seem bad to them then they will feel this way about who they are. They system itself is broken at best but, the foster care experience can be a positive influence for the child if they get placed in one of the rare homes that is in it for the right reason.
 
Replied By: kscann224 on Mar 22, 2015, 3:45PM
I was.adopted at 6 months of age, and I am so tired of hearing other adopted adults blaming their problems on the fact they are adoptef, & don't know who they are. I am the daughter of an FBI agent, a homemaker, & the proud sister of a Boarder Patrol Agent. I am blessed to have been put up for adoption, I was chosen by two wonderful, loving people who wanted to share their life with me, they didnt have to, the wanted to, out of love!! I know exactly who I am & where I come from, my Mom used to read me a poem, " not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone, but yet somehow miraculously my own. Never forget for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, bur in it". I am so very blessed to have my parents & brother. If I were to meet the woman that gave me up, I.would thank her for giving me the best family anyone could ask for, so when I hear adopted adults blaming adoption for their problems, I just want to say, take responsibility for your own life, &'the choices you make.
 
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