2013 Shows

(Original Air Date: 01/03/12) Do you consider yourself smart, yet continue to make bad choices? This New Year, stop setting yourself up for pain, and put your problems in the rearview mirror! Dr. Phil says ex-spouses Jennifer and Phil are the perfect example of intelligent people whose choices could lead to terrible consequences. Since their divorce five years ago, they say they have been at war, and their three children are caught in the crosshairs. Jennifer says her “sperm donor” of an ex-husband doesn’t make enough of an effort to see their children and owes her nearly $30,000 in back child support. Phil says Jennifer is a habitual liar who “infects” the kids with lies about him and is on a mission to keep him away from his kids. Dr. Phil doesn’t mince words when he tells Jennifer and Phil the mistakes they’re making. After hearing what their kids have to say, will this couple redefine their co-parenting plan before their children pay the price? And, one of the world's leading researchers in cognitive psychology and a member of the Dr. Phil Advisory Board, Dr. Art Markman, talks about his book, Smart Thinking, and the three-part formula for employing effective learning and smart thinking in your daily life. And, don’t miss Dr. Markman’s five keys to breaking any bad habit!

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: trevip1 on Jan 3, 2013, 1:02PM
After watching this show I thank the good lord for my situation.  My son and girlfriend were together for 2 years had a son and when my grandson was 7 months old they broke up.  My grandson is 5 years old and my son and his ex girlfriend are always on the same page when it comes to their son.  Don't get me wrong things are not always perfect but they make the best for their son.  His ex has a new boyfriend and he is even very cordial with my family.  We have never had separate birthday parties for my grandson we always have one party and invite her family her boyfriend even comes over and helps with the decorations . We are very good friends with her family and believe it or not we even share holidays and never had any problems.  I know our situation is unusual but we do this for my grandson he has two families who adore him and he is a very blessed child.  I wish there were more families like ours.  I felt so sorry for the son when he was crying because his dad sent him a check that bounced - shame on dad.  I will pray for this family and hope they take Dr. Phil's help.  Thank you.
Replied By: imamosaic on Jan 2, 2013, 3:06PM
I only read a few of these replies but I think I am in the minority in finding the mother more sympathic.  She made mistakes but was willing to listen to Dr. Phil and that is the first step in change- Admitting there is a problem.  The father didn't seem interested in fixing the problems he had.  The parent who is raising the kids has the hardest job and the most opportunity for making mistakes.  (She also has the greatest opportunity for rewards)

I do agree with Dr. Phil the kids are caught in this and paying the price.  If the Dad sends a check without funds to cover it, I don't believe it is Mom's job to make it right.  That is, what it is.  If he doesn't show up for arranged visitations, the kids know what is going on, nothing more needs to be said.  Mom is saying too much and Dad is trying to phone-in his being a Dad.

It will be good to see if counseling will make them aware.  It will make a big difference for the kids.  I hope Dr. Phil can work his magic on this family.  Good Luck Dr. Phil!
Replied By: rrozry on Jan 2, 2013, 8:39AM
As I listened, Dr. Phil, you appeared to blame the dad as much or more than the mom.

The kids should NEVER have known how much the father did or did not pay.  The empty bank account could have happened even if he was there. Letting the kids know about it, hurts them. A lot of people dont have enough to do EVERYTHING they want.  That should not have affected the life that the mother and father have with their kids. Even if they were living out of the car.   I dont think the father is blameless.  More oblivious than anything.  But the Mom is treating the kids as her confident.  She needs friends to whine too.   It appears he was not abusive so the kids dont need to really know about the relationship until they are 18 and can make their own minds.
Replied By: tardisgrl on Jan 1, 2013, 11:00PM
I cannot believe how manipulative the mother was! Her crocodile tears didn't convice me at all! She needs to stop coaching her kids and leave there children. Good for Dr. Phil for calling her out! 

What a poor example of a parent!
Replied By: jrsmom on Jan 1, 2013, 7:15PM - In reply to thommyboy
Hang in there it will bite her in the butt, stay positive with ur kids, and never say a bad word about their mom.
Replied By: jrsmom on Jan 1, 2013, 7:13PM - In reply to thommyboy
Hang in there it will bite her in the butt, stay positive with ur kids, and never say a bad word about their mom.
Replied By: jrsmom on Jan 1, 2013, 7:02PM
They r taking 52 percent out of his check, and she's crying he needs to pay more, I agree both parties r wrong but she is sooo wrong, blocking his calls,and blocking families calls, and if he is 10 mins. Late he can't have the kids. She has brain washed her kids, and it is going to bite her in the butt. They but need to learn to have a parent relationship. 
Replied By: mishadog on Jan 1, 2013, 6:36PM - In reply to kaitys_mom
when they marry, or have a baby with a deadbeat - if they were still with the man and he lost his job, went on welfare etc. they would suck it up and provide for the family but if they are no longer with him they complain and complain - they chose him and he didn't change his personality all of a sudden - of couse a man should do all he can to get a job and provide for his children but i get tired of women who act like everything wrong is the man's fault and they are perfect and have more entitlement in the raising of the children than the father does
Replied By: teerex on Jan 1, 2013, 4:19PM
This guy is a deadbeat dad not seeing his kids for months and blaming his ex for all his reasons why he doesn't see them,he didn't see them because his selfish life is more important than his kids, he tried to say he didn't believe what they were saying when they tried to tell him their feelings, obviously he WASN'T  listening to what they were saying he just wanted to blame the ex. Dr Phil, you missed the mark on some of the comments you made to the parents, although yes they should keep the fighting between them and not include the kids, IT IS NOT  up to the mother to keep the father informed on the school and other activities of the children,as the judge in my divorce told my ex, we have joint custody and it is up to HIM to find out the information about the kids by informing the school of his address for ,ie..school parent teacher nights and activities parents are invited to.  yes the mother complained about  not  having money to feed,clothe or do things with her children thats because he was 30 THOUSAND dollars behind in support and giving lame excuses to her,but he found the money to hire a lawyer to go to court to cut the support each time,these men believe cutting the support hurts the ex wife but its the kids that suffer,  you can judge and give "medical"text advice to these people but your not going thru this,its easy to say things but try living it. Some men are just lousy parents and examples for the children and they just dont care about anyone but themselves, i know from experience,my kids father walked out without even the courtesy of talking to them ten years ago and never looked back,he thought we'd break without him but my children and i  found out we are strong, we ate alot of pasta meals because he too took me back for revised child support,but the kids are better off without his emotional and verbal abuse,the boys know what kind of man they dont want to be and my daughter found a man that is nothing like her father and lovers her very much. So some of your advice is true and  valid, not all situations can be fixed by reading it out of a book,living it is much more difficult. 

The woman on the show smiled thru it all in the beginning, maybe to curb her anger at her ex,you dont know if it were an abusive situation when she lived with him, he seemed to be someone that  didn't accept his part in the problem.that can frustrate a person.  Im not just siding with her but sometimes someones reaction is because of someones actions.  

I know you said the kids may be loyal to the mother, i understand that and its true to a degree,but the kids also know how they've been treated by the father before and after the divorce  and they know if they want to be in contact with him, your assuming that all fathers are good rolemodels sometimes it may be better for the kids NOT to have him around.
Replied By: saskiacmt on Jan 1, 2013, 3:42PM
and just cuz they have an education, don't mean they are smart!
Showing 1-10 of total 134 Comments