2011 Shows

Desperate to save their marriages, three couples spend an intense three days at the Dr. Phil House. After role-playing exercises, social experiments, a few surprise guests and some shocking revelations, one big question remains: Which couples will stay together? And who will call it quits? Dr. Phil gets to the heart of each relationship to help them move forward -- for better or worse. Can Mike learn to calm his anger? Can Kim find forgiveness? Don’t miss this couple’s emotional apology to their daughters, and Mike’s vow to be a different man. Then, is a secret from Greg’s past causing his rage? Can his marriage to Jennifer be salvaged? Find out what Jennifer’s mother, Linda, thinks, and how much her opinion factors into Jennifer’s decisions. Plus, find out why Dr. Phil says Gaubriel’s chauvinism is fueled by hurt and resentment. Can he and Tatiana turn their parent/child relationship back into a romantic one? Don’t miss the amazing insights that could save these marriages -- and possibly your own.

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: danielmilloy on Jun 21, 2012, 4:22AM
Interesting show, great to see relationships being helped.

But one thing struck me about Greg... My gaydar kept going off very loudly whenever I saw him.

If he *is* in the closet, it would certainly explain a lot, if not most, of his behaviour... self-loathing often turns against those who love you, frustration turns to cynicism and anger towards anything positive around you (e.g. the Dr. Phil staff).

It would be interesting to see a follow-up on these couples.
Replied By: celebok on Dec 3, 2011, 1:24AM - In reply to michael7040
Hey, Mike, good to see you commenting on the message board, especially with all the backlash you've been getting.  As for that Bible verse, if you're going to read it and understand it correctly, you really need to read the full context that it's in.  That one verse was addressed only to the wives, and can easily be misinterpreted out of context.  What's interesting to note is that it's immediately followed by a much longer section preaching to the husbands, and that's the part that you as the husband should pay attention to, if you're going to pay attention to this bit of Scripture at all.

Here's what Ephesians 5:21-33 says:

"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.  In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his wife loves himself.  After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church—- for we are members of his body.  'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.'  This is a profound mystery—-but I am talking about Christ and the church.  However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."

Even this in its entirety is difficult to understand how to apply it to a husband and wife in a practical sense, and certainly I as a single guy can't claim to fully understand it.  But I just wanted to point out that the one verse that I originally mentioned that says "wives submit to your husbands" isn't a free pass for a husband to treat his wife however he wants.
Replied By: michael7040 on Dec 2, 2011, 8:42AM - In reply to celebok
this is mike #2,that was well said.and you are exactly right. i was telling her this the whole time. im going to read that bible verse right now. thanks
Replied By: celebok on Dec 1, 2011, 10:47AM
Obi-Wan Kenobi explained the Jedi mind-trick to Luke Skywalker in these words: "The Force can have a strong influence on the weak-minded." Apparently, the same can be said for the techniques that Dr. Phil used on those three boneheaded husbands in the Dr. Phil House. From what I remember seeing at the beginning of this three-part series, those guys seemed so set in their cocky, chauvinistic ways and ready to call their marriages quits, I thought there was no way they would ever be motivated to change. And it turns out I was wrong on all three counts! In fact, in this final episode, Dr. Phil uncovered things about all three of these couples' pasts that I never would've guessed, but it explained why the men behaved the way they did and apparently made lightbulbs go on inside their heads. I guess I should've realized that even Darth Vader could be turned from the dark side. Okay, that's enough with the Star Wars references.

The Doc dealt with each couple separately this time. Number Two and Demon Hunter were first. The Doc pointed out to Demon Hunter that while she seeks to focus on her relationship with God, dissing her husband is not in the service of God. (The Doc probably could've quoted Ephesians 5:22, but that probably would've freaked her out.) He also pointed out that Number Two feels rejected by her, despite reacting to those feelings in really stupid ways. I do recall that Number Two had tried to tell Demon Hunter the same thing himself earlier, but she immediately accused him of being a liar. I was hoping the Doc would point that out, but at least Demon Hunter got the main message this time. She said she was willing to forgive him and start fresh. Then the Doc invited their two teenage daughters into the room, and Number Two and Demon Hunter both apologized to them, and Number Two promised them that they'd get their dad back. Number Two now realizes that the Doc was cheering him on the whole time. I'm almost worried that he'll soon be starting his own Dr. Phil cult, the way he seemed to be worshipping the Doc at the end.

Next up, Mr. and Mrs. Pancake. But first, a bunch of people from Dr. Phil's staff came in and confronted Mr. Pancake about some offensive remarks he'd made about the show while the cameras were rolling the previous day. Basically he'd claimed that the show was all about ratings and that the Doc's people didn't know what they were doing. Okay, he's not the first person to say stuff like that about the show, but he's one of the few guests who's been stupid enough to say it while he's actually on the show, particularly when he knows he's going to be there for a while and the staff has plenty of time to confront him! Mr. Pancake realized his mistake and apologized, since there was really nothing else he could do, and then all those staff members left. The rest of the session with Mr. and Mrs. Pancake seemed like quite a few conversations with previous guests on the Dr. Phil Show, even down to the meddling mother-in-law that the wife always runs to when things get bad. The Doc told Mrs. Pancake that she needs to invite her mother out of the marriage, so she did. Because Mrs. Pancake had told her mom so many bad things about Mr. Pancake, the mom had pretty much been programmed to hate Mr. Pancake, so she voiced a lot of concerns for her daughter. But eventually she accepted the Doc's advice to step back, be quiet and watch and see what happens. As Yoda might say to her, "You must unlearn what you have learned." (Okay, seriously, I don't know why I'm so fixated on Star Wars right now!) Later, as the mom was leaving, she stopped to give Mr. Pancake a hug. In the background, Number Two's daughters were making the most use of that pool table out of anyone we've seen on the show. But what I'm wondering is, what exactly was Mr. Pancake doing in that room with Number Two's daughters? I couldn't really tell, since that scene was edited out of context, but I imagine Number Two would've had the same question on his mind when he watched the show!

Last but not least, it's Caveman time. Now this is yet another case where I learned that my initial assessments were completely wrong. I totally assumed that Caveman's chauvinistic attitude was just something he grew up with. It turns out that it actually began when Modern Woman made a couple of bad choices that Caveman resented, so Caveman felt like he had to have complete control over her from that point on. This was all news to me. Those realizations must've been either off camera or edited out. So anyway, that's why they both said in the first episode that they weren't like that when they got married! They really weren't! So after that part got resolved, the Doc suddenly brought up his concerns for Caveman's health because of his weight, and he offered him the 17 Day Diet plan and the Bistro MD service. In other words, the Doc was basically calling Caveman a fat slob. I mean, sure, I can see that he's overweight, but it's not like he's Jabba the Hut or something. (Yeah, yeah, I know.) But Caveman seemed to appreciate the offer, and Modern Woman accepted the offer as well.

The Doc brought all three couples back together for some parting words and goodbyes. Mrs. Pancake mentioned that it was the first time she'd seen Number Two and Demon Hunter sitting so close together. If sitting close together on a couch is supposed to be an indicator of how successful the marriage will be, then that's not really good news for Caveman and Modern Woman, who were sitting as far apart on the couch as they could and even had a big pillow wedged between them horizontally. But it did seem that everybody left on a positive note and confident that the Doc had saved their marriages. I totally never would've predicted this outcome after watching the first episode! But then again, I didn't expect Princess Leia to fall in love with Han Solo, either. Okay, that's it, I'm outta here! To Number Two, Demon Hunter, Caveman, Modern Woman, Mr. Pancake and Mrs. Pancake... may the Force be with you!
Replied By: srmaeg on Nov 30, 2011, 3:18PM
I can't believe Dr. Phil would counsel a woman to stay with a man who had physically abused her. So much for being an advocate for ending domestic violence. Abusers don't change, especially after one week. Perhaps after a physical seperation, intensive therapy, and mood-stabilizing medication their marriage could work. I feel worst for their daughters. Their parents promised them a stable, happy house and I bet within days it will go back to normal. I can't imagine anything more harmful to kids than seeing their parents in a yo-yo relationship like this.
Replied By: celtickelly on Nov 30, 2011, 12:18PM
There was something missing from this story-line that really bothered me.    When a man "demands" sex...whether from his wife or not...that is rape.  Partner and marital rape is more common than people realize or are willing to admit.  When a man pressures and begs, and bothers a woman for sex...after she has said no...that is not OK.  When your husband won't let you sleep until he's had sex with you...that is not OK.  A wife is not "free game" because she married you.  When she says "no"...it still means "no". 

I really wish this had been pointed out and discussed.  Millions of wives are sexually assaulted, and pressured into sex from their partners.  This was a good opportunity to discuss it and and discuss the mindset that wives are "unrapeable".
Replied By: kathleen27 on Nov 30, 2011, 11:21AM - In reply to leardkeeter

Everyday, we encourage abused spouses to TELL someone, not to "cover it up".  O.K. so really, who do you tell, and WHY can't that "go to" person be your MOTHER?  For many people, Mom may not be the choice for sharing, but if she is, I see nothing wrong with telling anything to your Mother.

All of the three couples agreed to appear on National T.V. so I feel it is safe to assume that friends and family are now aware of the troubled marriages.

IF these couples were able to work things out between themselves, there would be no reason to approach Dr. Phil, telling millions of  people, in an attempt to reach out for help.

For couple problems where there is opened communication and mutual respect within the relationship, and NOTHING like we saw on the Show, I agree that it is wise to deal with issues as a unit.  It seems to me, marriage has become exclusive of family, causing isolation, and lack of support from the people who love you.

During my very successful marriage ( THANK GOD), my MIL is my strongest supporter..better said OUR strongest supporter.  I lost both of my parents and as an only child, I really do, at times, want to talk to my MIL.  Her advise only comes from love of her son, her grandchildren, and me. 
Replied By: glstefan on Nov 30, 2011, 10:44AM
I watched the first segement and the last of this series.  The one thing I noticed in the couple, where she had blonde hair, was that even their appearance had changed.  After they had worked thru their problems and came to terms with fact that they both had issues, their entire demeanor was different.  Their faces looked so much more relaxed and even younger.  I am rooting for them. I pray that they will make the necessary changes to stay together
Replied By: njgirl61 on Nov 30, 2011, 10:05AM
Dr. Phil.  You did a great job in trying to understand and save these marriages.  I wish you were my personal therapist.  I believe these couples can improve and thrive.  The hard part is admitting the wrong doing and recognizing that there are issues beyond our control.  Seek and you shall find the guidance and it can be a win win for all.  Thank you Dr. Phil.  That last episode brought tears to my eyes and i saw alot of relationship issues within all three couples.  I feel there is hope for me.
Replied By: njgirl61 on Nov 30, 2011, 10:00AM
After seeing the last show, it brought me to tears.  These couples have endured so much especially the wives.  They don't realize what anger does to their children.  It is so important for couples to communicate  no matter how hard the topics are and to really listen to each other.  It was relief to see them work it out and to believe in their marriage and relationship.  I have been married more than 25 years and believe me I had my share of the same issues these couples did.  I am fighting to save my marriage at all costs because I believe in it can be repaired.  Why bother with marriage, family and kids if there is no solid foundation to fight for it.  The world might as well stay single.
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