2010 Shows

(Original Air Date: 09/15/10) Monica and Lloyd say they’re devastated that their 19-year-old daughter, Jamie Lynn, is dating Shawn, a 41-year-old man. Jamie Lynn is an aspiring singer, living on her own and performing in bars. Her parents don’t approve of her lifestyle and especially her choice in a boyfriend, whom they refuse to even meet. When the family dug into Shawn’s past, they were shocked at what they discovered. Jamie Lynn says she’s old enough to make her own decisions and if her family gives her an ultimatum, she will choose Shawn. Shawn says he would never hurt Jamie Lynn and can’t believe her parents are judging him without even meeting him. Hear from Jamie Lynn’s sister, who agreed to meet Shawn, and learn why she says she came away feeling sick. How can this family close the rift that’s tearing them apart?

Find out what happened on the show.
Replied By: honestgirl14 on Oct 22, 2014, 5:42PM - In reply to caroline_rose_
the whole family is fantastic! 

jamie and Shawn have been married for almost 4 years and have never been happier. her parents adore him now that theI have actually met him. and all is literally as close to perfect as it could be! 

good luck in your relationship don't listen to the haters or you could miss out on happily ever after!! 

Replied By: gchoogen on Aug 12, 2014, 10:20AM
That's the thing with watching these older taped shows.  I could just about guess what Miss 19's future was but now I'd like to know if I was right. 

My opinion is that her parents had a right to be very concerned about the guy's history of "hit and run" relationships.  It's easy for observers to say, "She's 19 and an adult - her choice."  The truth is, the poor choices of our children come back to bite us in the butt.  Our childrens' poor choices can effect generations, leaving us with grandchildren to raise, Leaving grandchildren with emotional issues etc. 

Having said that, I don't think the parents were going about it the right way.  They don't want to alienate their daughter.  They were right to give their daughter all of the information they obtained and they were right to give their daughter their opinion.  After that, they just have to stand back and watch what happens (as Mr. 40 said).  I don't think it'll take long.  Then it's up to her parents to become a soft place to fall.  Because fall she will.

Why does Mr. 40 lo-ove Miss 19?  Well because she's easy to woo with sophistry; she's pretty, young, intelligent and shapely (unlike most of the women his age that he could get); she comes with no baggage (like most women his age would have), and best of all - she's naive.

I predict that after the honeymoon period is over and the baby is born and there's a new Miss 19 at the club, Mr. 40 will be gone like the wind.  He knows what he likes and as long as there are stupid girls, he can have what he likes.  His past predicts her future.   
Replied By: caroline_rose_ on Feb 12, 2014, 8:48AM
I'm just now watching this show. First off I'm almost 25 and my boyfriend will be 61. We have a son who is 18 months old. Before I had gotten into this relationship i sat down with my parents and explained what i felt towards him. Then when we decied to have a child I sat down with my parents again and I got their opinon

.I know most people wouldn't agree with the age difference but love doesn't come with an age. You can't help who you fall in love with. I've been in servel relationships before this one and no man has ever treated with the respect that this man has. Age is just a number, nothing more.

I hope that this family works out and no one gets hurt.
Replied By: friedwonton87 on Jun 25, 2012, 10:23PM
I don't think it is fair to conclude that a relationship will flounder just by simply concluding that the age difference is too far apart. The exception to this rule would be if the younger of the two in the relationship is less than 18 years old. My aunt's doctor was in his 40s, never married nor had a relationship, until he met a woman 10 years younger, another doctor. They both fell in love, are now married, and could not be any happier now. My aunt remarks how great of a couple they are too! We don't fall in love with someone because they are x amount of ages apart from us. We fall in love with someone because of his or her qualities.

Now in the case with Jamie Lynn and Shawn's relationship, the scrutiny of the relationship by Jamie Lynn's parents is well deserved, not because of the fact that Shawn is much older than Jamie, but the facts around Shawn's character. 
Being divorced twice, abandoning 3 children, and  having an arrest warrant and a criminal record are certainly signs of alarm. If my daughter were around someone with these characteristics, I would be VERY concerned, no matter what age the boy or man was. If Shawn were 21, instead of 41, the cause for alarm  will still be the same given the baggage he has.  

On the other hand, if Shawn were a decent man, a hardworker, loyal, then I would say let them both go for it. 

To respond to people's assumptions that how does a 41 year old man meet with a 19 year woman, or what may a 41 year old man and a 19 year old woman have in common. Havbe you heard of community college? Community college, unlike high school, have people in their 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, even in their 60s attending classes.  Just because someone is older in a relationship does not equate them with dirtbag status.  Hell, dating/domestic violence, possessiveness,power and control also occurs in same aged couples as well. It is the character of the person, not the age.
Replied By: crystaltwo on May 2, 2011, 9:20PM - In reply to alconamac
Yes, I wish Dr Phil would explain what parents should do in situations where their daughter seems to be in denial. My husband and I had a wonderful relationship with our loving daughter until she met a control freak, who was so jealous of the relationship she had with us.  She was in her mid twenties (he was her first boyfriend).
We were happy our daughter had found someone, because she was lonely.  He asked her to marry him and we told them they could have the wedding reception place of their choice.   He made all the decisions, we gave them the deposit for the reception, cake decorator etc.  At this time, we had no idea that he was trying to isolate our daughter from her family and friends but she started to become withdrawn from us.
One day we arrived home to find all her clothes gone - he had driven up here to move her out, knowing we were not at home. We received an email to say they were getting married in his town and to cancel all the arrangements they had made.  We lost all the deposits which we paid for, although that was the least of our worries.   Her father, brother and I were devastated.
Our daughter was living in a town with an older lady who they both knew - he was living about an hours drive from where she was.  Each time we phoned her she was very guarded with what she said, as if she was frightened of us.  We asked him if we could sit down and talk about things but he refused because he said he won't sit down with us, or anyone else.  We believe he would have been concerned that HIS wedding plans would revert back to her getting married in her town.
He has isolated her so much we cannot phone her or email her - when we send her a gift for her birthday each year we have to send it person-to person, so she has to sign for it.  That is how we know she received it.  As far as any other mail, we don't believe she would receive it.  It has been ten years now since we have seen her and we just will continue to send her a card for Christmas and a present for her birthday.
Our daughter does not have a nasty streak in her body - she has always been a daughter to be proud of and a very good living girl.  We recently found an article on the internet called "Stockholm Syndrome" which explains this situation (this may help you too).   This gave us the answers we needed, as to why our daughter could do this to us, as we were such a close knit family.  He was telling our daughter we are trying to break them up.   If she is happy with him, thats fine - we just want her in our life.   If he wants nothing to do with us, we just wish she would be strong enough to tell him she would like to see us.  She sees no-one from her past at all, not even her bridesmaid.  What is your situation - would like to hear from you and your thoughts on our dilemma.
Replied By: poikilotherm on Apr 26, 2011, 3:26AM
This 41 year old guy shows a totally arrogant attitude from the start with questioning the parents. No wonder the sister was disturbed by him. He said he'd changed his ways and yet some of his issues were still current. The girl is in the ga ga stage of her relationship and totally unreachable. Be interested to see the result of this disaster.
Replied By: raspberryt on Jan 17, 2011, 10:51PM
I know when you're young and in love, it's easy to dismiss the fears of others. I was involved with a man very similar to Shawn and it was ugly. Any man in his 40s who wants to date a teenager is a high risk. He can't get anyone his own age, so he preys on younger women. I don't want you to end up pregnant and abandoned. =(
Replied By: aslan02 on Jan 9, 2011, 10:30PM - In reply to mary1231

I agree with EVERYBODY DESERVES SECOND CHANCES,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, OR MORE!!!

I Have always struggled with socialising with other people my own age,,,,,,,,,,,,, have always enjoyed older and younger people's companty all of my friend's are either older or younger then be not by all that much...................... With Jamie Lynn's family divided over Jamie Lynn dating Shawn I can see how  Monica and her father are feeling,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,despite shawn's past of being married, divorced, marriage, divorce agai most of our cultures stasitics show that children ninetypercent of the time come from single homes, have stepfamiiles etc there is no real cure for happy families no family is perfect,

DR PHiL is right Jamie Lynn's parents are driving her right into Shawn's arms,,,,,,,,,,,,, just because unless there is a serious criminial history of murder, rape, terroist then Shawn and everybody should deserve a second change doesn't matter no criminal criminal history unless Shawn has murdered, raped then Shawn should be given second chacnce let Shawn be able to prove to Jamie Lynn's family that he can and will change for the better,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Dr Phil has seen the worst to themost nightmare distarters of young people and oldish people destroy their lives then  they do A massive turn around become wonderful, amazing, bright, intelligen, smart,  decide to change their life by doing something about their life,. I do  agree that Jamie Lynn's parents are doing the right thing raising concenns  but parents can't protcet their children forever if we don't learn to make mistakes then how we will we ever be able to correct mistakes,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, unless Shawn does do something more to break the law and put Jamie Lynnn's life in danger  or Jamie Lynn doesn't  feel happy, safe in the relationship with Shawn then it is her choice............. I can see that this is A high risk,,,,,,, don't judge too quickly that is how familie get ruined.

Replied By: mrsdbrice on Dec 29, 2010, 7:56AM
I am only 21 years old. When I was 19 I met a 40 year old man on MYSPACE. The man knew the father of my child and wanted to help me find him to get child support. He and I ended up talking every night on chat and enjoyed each others company. His girlfriend and my boyfriend at the time ended up leaving us in the same week. It was a few days later that I told his daughter (at the time 17) that I was in Love with her father. She encouraged me to tell him. Not even a month later I came to visit him and his family, then the following week I moved in with him and his younger daughter (10 at the time) in his new house. So it was him, his 10 year old, my 7 month old, my 2 year old, and myself. Now together we have 4 kids on the house ages 1, 2, 4, & 12 and I'm due next Spring with out second child together. He was married twice before me, one for 14 years, and the other for only 2 years. His wives were horrible to him. He had 3 kids with his first wife (He took custody of the 2 girls when he left, but their son wanted to stay) And the second wife disappeared without notice, taking their son with her and filing for child support. Not everything is what it seems when you look at what seems to be a strange or innapropriate couple. I fell in Love with my husband by being on chat every night. In those nights I'd forget about age difference... Because there didn't seem to be one mentally. I'm more grown up than my age, and if getting married was a mistake that's for ME to find out. My parents see how Loving he is with our kids and me, and how how much we Love him. So dispite how they felt at first. they accept him as my husband and the father of my children.
Replied By: ctwete on Dec 27, 2010, 12:57PM
I have been going with a wonderful man for 1 1/2 years now. He is 58 and I am 48. He has been married twice and in a 11 year relationship. He does not talk much about his relationships. He is so good to me and believe me I am really together. I did not really think, I wanted to be in another relationship since my divorce and two other failed relationships. How do I ask why or how his relationships ended. I know his first wife was a alcholiFound this out because of a support group we both belongs to over 5 years ago. Od does it really matter how they ended if our relationship is going well. Of course not perfect, although we are learning what each other likes and does not like and that is what our problems are because we are both very set in our ways. This show made me think of his mulitple relationships and this man did.
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