2009 Shows

January 20, 2009
(Original Air Date: 10/24/08) Ladies, what would you do if you had to return to the dating game in your 40s, 50s or even 60s? Dr. Phil’s guests point to a double standard between men and women. Men can date women young enough to be their daughters, while a middle-aged woman who dates younger men is sure to face criticism. Caroline is a 58-year-old grandmother who has been married three times and is still looking for her Prince Charming. She admits to traveling from Monaco to Amsterdam and throughout the States in search of love, often with younger men. Caroline says she even accepted a proposal from a man she met online -- a suitor she has never met in person! Her daughter, Anara, says the problem is not her mother’s age, but that her mom doesn’t act her age. Is Caroline just living life without limits, or is she her own worst enemy when it comes to meeting Mr. Right? Then, Dr. Phil talks to Patti Stanger, CEO of The Millionaire’s Club, an exclusive dating service that caters to wealthy men and women who are looking for love. Find out why Patti says Caroline is heading toward a life of loneliness, and learn her dating tips to increase your chances of finding a mate. And, Anna is only 30, but she says some men already think she’s too old to date! Her friend, Robyn, says Anna's independence turns some men off. Find out what happens when Dr. Phil cameras follow Anna for a night on the town. Plus, meet a divorced mom who says she’s been on the dating scene for 15 years and has yet to find a man her age who wants to commit.. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.
Comments
Replied By: mauvegirl on May 22, 2009, 8:50AM - In reply to karyncarl5984
I guess that men should also dumb down on a date too.(Just kidding)

No way will I, especially since it will only inflate his ego more. Why on earth should a woman on date make herself smaller so a man can feel bigger?

A few men I have dated needed a bit of ego deflating from themselves(its not for me to do).
I just don't date men who have inflated egos.

I neither bring myself down to make  them feel better, nor do I try to act like I am competitive, even in the past when I was an owner.

Its really a power issue and it is a waste of time. If someone really had power he/she wouldn't have to act that way.

I would much rather learn what make him happy, feel comfortable than to act as if I can inflate his ego.
It's called getting to know someone.mauvegirl.
 
Replied By: mauvegirl on May 22, 2009, 8:27AM - In reply to chevy020
Ok,
It means, Tell me a bit about what you love, to do, how you relate, or think, what you feel about things, topics or yourself in your life.

If someone asks me what I do(at work etc) I tell them but more importantly it is about who you are or what you are trying to achieve in your life. Who are you, what do you want to be as an ideal person.Mauvegirl.
 
Replied By: chevy020 on Jan 29, 2009, 1:54PM
My question with guest shange the comedein. What does he mean exactly when he asks a women the question "tell me about you" when they respond with what they do for a living and what their hobbies and interests are he says "I didn't ask you about that I said "tell me about you" The reason I ask is the look on Dr. Phil's face when shange was done, I feel I am not the only one who did not understand what he meant. Also I think he stole this from a movie with Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler.
 
Replied By: pgapro on Jan 28, 2009, 11:51PM
Dr. Phil;

You are a Saint, and I am applying to the Pope for you directly.  I can honetly say I have seen some miracles on you show, and more than enough to qualify.

With reference to Double Standards.
Are we having another one of those battle of the sexes things again?
My apologies in advance here for being so long winded.  But I could really go on at length on this subject of double standards.  And I am guessing that it might be a book that would end up dwarfing war and peace, lol.

Anna, kudos to you, I glad you are a successful woman, most of all your a lady about it.  You are beautiful and elegant and I feel your pain.  It would be a joy to know you.  The man who does get the opportunity of being your mate for life, will have been given a great honor.  He will be a very lucky man.  and if he misbehaves, gimme a call, and we can find a field so he and I can go have a talk.
Justice was given in a back forty field (mostly full of corn) in my era, ask Dr. Phil abut this one.

I won't go into religion here, and while I will touch on a serious subject, I say most of the below with an all but mild humorous tongue in cheek attitude, but I will note, and stand firm on this one albeit two part question.  " Who bit the apple first, and second, who did she point a finger at as the guilty party "  Grin

First here's my main rant. From a man's perspective, the female ( I use that term loosely ) from the Millioniares Club shot herself in the foot and verified, what a majority of men, both feel and view, when it comes to women.  We are very subtley, given the appearance, that it's all about the MONEY.  "Qualify your buyer", oh please.  Why not put a sign on yourself saying I am all about your cash.  To coin Dr. Phil here, What are you thinking?  We all saw the look on his face with that statement, and I am sure most could read his thoughts right then.  At least you were honest about it, I do give you credit there.

I have said this for for a long time now.  When it comes to relationships.
Women for the most part, as I have experienced, get married for two reasons  Security and Love
Men on the other hand get married for Love and Sex.  Though not necessarily in those exact orders.  I have yet to hear any man say to me, "I am getting married to her because I am sure she will be a great mother and provider for our children."  Everyman I have ever asked put love first and everything else second.  Yet I have heard women say that they were getting married, because they felt he is and will be a great provider, and they are secure with that.  And then they say and I love him too.

I heard this question asked of a future groom and bride (no not me, but it did make me think), and only one time...I never forgot it.  That question is "If after you are married, and the two of you are out one night, and you get presented with a life threatening situation, to where one of the two of you were certain to die, who would it be that would live?  Would you die for her?  Would she die for you? Every man I have ever asked said yes, and without hesitation.  But not every woman offered that same opinion.

In a lifetime commitment, your are marrying and choosing to spend the rest of your life with that person.  Everything else and I mean everything else, should become secondary to your marriage and relationship with that person.  For if it is not going to be that way, then why would you ever consider wanting, to spend the rest of your life with that person.  If you think I am joking hear, how many of your really truest friends would give their life in order to save yours.  I say friends as your mate is supposed to be your best friend first.  Then look at which family members would do that as well.  Then ask yourself the question of, who would you do that for.  Sorry for the fatalistic attitude here, not meant to bring anyone down.  But in reality, have you ever asked these questions?

Don't get me wrong here, I Love women.  And I am definitely a heterosexual man.  But where do you think we learned the double standard routine?  To coin a phrase, Women change their minds why, because they can", and this one is even better, " It's a woman's perogative to change their mind".  Now seriously, how fair is that?  Why should you be able to and we cannot?

Now everyone laugh and go get along.
 
Replied By: wilitevend on Jan 28, 2009, 10:55PM
"Dating Double Standards" January 20, 2009 show DID NOT SHOW because of President Barack Obama Inaugural Day.  I am single in my 30s.  Of course I wanna see what Dr. Phil had in store for women like me.  PLEASE REPLAY THAT EPISODE SOON!!!

 

LONELY IN SOUTH CAROLINA
 
Replied By: tim12960 on Jan 28, 2009, 6:57PM
Hi Anna, my name is Tim. Contact me! Would love to speak with you!
 
Replied By: nanicampis on Jan 27, 2009, 2:00PM
i´m a child i have 12 years and i think that this mother is a women that doesn´t respect her , she is put in dangerous, she doesn´t know the bad people in the internet
 
Replied By: clarky on Jan 27, 2009, 12:25PM - In reply to happywifemommy
I understand you may want to be known as a trophy but me myself believe that I shouldn't just be looked at I want my relationship with my fiance to be looked at.I dont like the term Trophy I just dont thats my personal opinion and I think that Its degrading to a women. You may enjoy being your husbands trophy but  I enjoy being my fiances soulmate,better half and so forth. I think a relationship is something that has to be earned in the respect that its a lovely thing between two people.I dont tell people yeah this is my showpiece standing next to me I say this is my Fiance not my trophy.So there you have my opinion on the word Trophy does not make me a bad person or insecure about anything just my opinion on how I believe the word is degrading. Thank You 
 
Replied By: happywifemommy on Jan 27, 2009, 11:57AM - In reply to clarky
Why would you be upset that someone thinks you're a trophy? I am my husbands trophy and I am proud of it. If someones going to think I'm his trophy on his arm, I'm not going to let that bother me at all. Last I knew, a trophy was something you worked hard to earn. You should be a little more secure in your realtionship and not let silly comments like that offend you so much. It doesn't matter one bit what someone thinks about your age gap! The one's who use the term trophy, more than likely aren't trophy material anyway!!
 
Replied By: happywifemommy on Jan 27, 2009, 11:47AM - In reply to doomsdaydiva
I'm turning 35 next month also. I agree w/ you that older men are more respectful and distinguished. I think one thing that women forget is that they need to also show respect. So many women think that they need to be treated like a queen and forget that queens need to also be respectful. I don't think you can blame society on a womans attitude, but if that makes you feel better...well, ok! :)
 
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