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2010 Shows

 
We all go through trials, whether it’s a health challenge, family crisis or relationship woes. But what happens when tough times only seem to multiply? Muyassar, a single mother of six children, says that since 9/11, her kids have been constantly bullied at school because of their Muslim faith. She says one of her sons was expelled for fighting and had to spend 120 days in juvenile hall, an incident that made local headlines. Learn what happens when she and her children meet with school officials. Will their conflict be resolved, or will Muyassar have to leave the community? Then, Keith and Carmen have been married and divorced twice … to each other! Carmen says that at one point in their relationship, she took their daughter and left Keith for five years, and during that time, Keith had three children with three other women! Now, they’re thinking about walking down the aisle yet again. Will the third time be the charm, or should this couple quit while they're ahead?

Find out what happened on the show.
Comments
Replied By: lilcowgirl on Mar 15, 2011, 8:45PM - In reply to tamleylama
it has been a long time since i have been on here an you took jued as i dont know what it means I do and it can also be used as something being taken away but that is just a hick vill girl
 
Replied By: znikerizm on Jul 6, 2010, 7:33PM
my heart goes out to this family <3
 
Replied By: snow_owl on Jun 24, 2010, 4:49PM
Not all Americans are prejudiced, certainly not.....but I am forever amazed and chagrined by a lot of what I see on mainstream internet forums and boards, such as Yahoo Groups, etc.

What I read, see, have to put up with, in terms of  "there's an American, and I guess that's my identity, etc.), is things like utter hatred against:  (never Jews), but Mexicans and especially Arabs and/or Muslims, not so much blacks anymore.  Revile against the name "Hussein" as being the middle name of the President, calling him a Muslim, when he's a Christian.  The implication that anything Arabic is not right, the enemy.  George Bush taught us to hate all Arabs.  This was done for political moves.  and for money.

Americans are getting to be real CORNY!  We're not the greatest nation anymore.  We're coming across as being stupid fat slobs.  I'm pretty ashamed of being an American actually.  I'm just not set up to immigrate anyplace else, and things are pretty much global by now anyway.

What has happened to us?...we are all immigrants, by ancestry at least,  (and I am not saying we should not have definite borders, etc.)  We're supposed to be ahead of the other nations spiritually.  But we're just a nation of good ole boys with fat stomachs, drinking plenty of beer and resorting to schoolboy tactics like calling somebody who is a bit different a name or -- jumping on them violently.

btw, I'm American born of Swedish/Irish stock.
 
Replied By: snow_owl on Jun 24, 2010, 4:29PM - In reply to sa2784
I don't know how a Muslim or Arabic person can really speak out in American society today.  I suppose you would have to go about it in a particular way.

What I mean by that is all the post 911 hype and predudice we were all required to adopt and learn, you know, "hate all Arabs/Muslims".  Will state here that I am an American like any other, and had the same feelings of loss/anguish everybody else had Sept 11.

We don't even really know whose government, whose terrorist group perpertrated 911.  There are a lot of theories out there...about controlling our own people, etc.

What's important here is that prejudice is not right.  Not against whites, not against blacks, not against Mexicans, not against the Japanese who lived in America in WW2 and not against Arabs or Muslims.

These things are being taught in our schools, paid for by taxpayer $$.  If only by compliance and lack of doing the right things legally.

I am an "anglo" white living in old timey Northern New Mexico, where many of the folks are still quite prejudiced.  I had a young Hispanic girl give me dirty looks today at the dental office where she worked and where my husband was there for treatment.  For what reason?  I don't even know her.  Well, I am quite familiar with "the look" -- as taught by their grandparents and parents.

So, I know what it feels like, being judged by your skin.  Hey, there is nothing I can do to change the colour of my skin, or my eyes.

At least it is a bit more subtle than the situation many Muslims in this country face.  It is not right! My husband and I have been to Ramadan dinner with Muslims in the area.  They are very devout people, perhaps they could be a little more open to other people's religions, but they are good people.

I am sorry to all Arabs and Muslims in America and England, etc. where you are judged for what a few terrorists of the same religion might have done.  So have Christians invaded and done things as well.

I am Catholic by choice, and my faith teaches acceptance and love.  What else can I say?  Sorry, sorry.
 
Replied By: snow_owl on Jun 24, 2010, 4:08PM - In reply to kay_bek
Thank you for your appreciation of America.  The banning of certain types of clothing by members of the EU, although I am not certain is fair or even legal, could ultimately result in greater gender freedom for Arabic women.

I am an American, and have for most of my life felt grateful to be one.  However, recently, since all the promo by the Bush/Reagan administrations post-911 (and I totally am there with every other American about our great loss) -- anyway, have felt a definite lack of pride in my fellow countryman.  A lot of us seem to be so prejudiced, so limited, so small in our outlook.  So violent, etc.

So I am not sure these days about America being the greatest.
 
Replied By: snow_owl on Jun 24, 2010, 3:57PM - In reply to nittany24
We need more educators like you.  Your text was totally relevant and correct.  (just now commenting because my husband and I just saw show, re-aired today.)
 
Replied By: snow_owl on Jun 24, 2010, 3:53PM - In reply to vegasn
I agree.
 
Replied By: vegasn on Apr 29, 2010, 6:52PM
I feel you missed the boat in your "analysis" of what was going on to the kids in school these days that are of the Muslim faith.  It is not about bullying.  In my opinion, bullying is trying to control someone who is less strong that yourself and will allow you to get the upper hand.  The issues happening to these kids in school is Racism and you didn't use that word at all and that's sad if you are trying to be politically correct.  If their skin color was any other, they would be left alone.  The kids are not Bullies, they are Racists and because the number of "brown" folks are so minor compared to the Latin Americans or African Americans, they are able to be "bullied" by Racists much easier without fear of retaliation.  Call it what it is - that Americans have found a new target to push Racist Supremacy and their kids are learning it's okay to hate due to a Race or Religion Again.  I am very disappointed and saddened that kids are thinking it's okay - Bully is a glory term for a lot of kids, but you call them Racists and let others know that's what they are, and they might not be so eager to behave they way they are.
 
Replied By: nittany24 on Apr 28, 2010, 11:10PM - In reply to cadescove99
I posted my reaction to your comment in a separate post above but I feel compelled to cut and paste only the relevant parts here to YOU:
For your information, the Qur'an does indeed encourage or require females to dress modestly and  cover themselves in public (see Sura 24:31 in the Qur'an)...and whats more is one of the reasons behind the covering is for PROTECTION and to prevent from being harassed (see Qur'an, Sura 33:58-59). Many of us may not be aware of these religious traditions, but as an educator (and non-Muslim), I make it a point to be aware of any religious and cultural practices in order to create a safe classroom environment for all of my students (many of whom are from diverse ethnic and religious backgrounds).
It is MY duty as an educator to EDUCATE students about differences whether its differences in culture, ethnic background,  race, class, gender, sexual orientation, etc..  The suggestion made by the Muslim brother about having a seminar in the school about cultural/religious diversity/awareness is brilliant and should have been conducted years ago!! Are teachers even addressing diversity in their classrooms?? We are all HUMAN and have that commonality but I strongly advocate a CELEBRATION of diversity, not a tolerance for it.
Secondly, why is wearing any kind of head dress perceived to be a "negative distraction"?  What constitutes a 'negative distraction" and by whom? Is it a negative distraction when my religious Jewish students who practice Judaism wear their kippah or yamulke (small round headpiece) to class? I think not and thankfully we have laws in this country that protect us from religious discrimination. The solution is creating awareness of cultural and religious diversity or ANY difference that is not part of mainstream society.
 
Replied By: nittany24 on Apr 28, 2010, 10:58PM
I was disheartened but NOT surprised to hear this story - racial/religious discrimination is not uncommon in U.S. schools, especially towards the latest ethnic group  (Arabs and Muslim Arabs) subjected to attacks from ignorant, misguided, and misinformed people.
Dr. Phil, I appreciate your eternal support and optimism that teachers and administrators have the best interest of their students at heart. HOWEVER, there ARE teachers and administrators that are complacent and reactionary when complaints of bullying and racial & religious bias/prejudice are brought to their attention. Some of the previous posts can attest to this based on personal experiences shared below.  I have been an educator for the past 13 years and am currently a professor in a school of education in NYC. I am very familiar with the politics behind education and "Zero Tolerance Policies" and how teachers, principals, superintendents, AND the Department of Education (DOE) handle accusations of bias and discrimination. Every case is unique and is dependent on who the accuser and accused is. I have witnessed classroom abuse of students from students, teacher to student, and administrator to teacher. I have testified at DOE hearings regarding charges of bias against administrators to teachers. While all cases are unique and deserve individual attention, there is NO doubt in my mind that these Muslim students were harassed by their peers and treated in a biased manner by school officials. And not too surprising, school officials did not take responsibility - SHAME ON THEM!
It was CLEAR that the children were being bullied due to racial/religious differences and no one was held accountable, even after reporting it to school officials, I commend those children for their bravery in sharing their story and publicly countering Mr. Smith's (vice principal) allegations that investigation and discipline were administered to those students charged with making racial remarks (i.e. "terrorist").  I completely understand confidentiality issues but as we ALL know, students talk in the hallways. They KNOW what discipline -or lack thereof - had been given to the perpetrators.  I believe the children when they stated the bullies were in the principal's office for "two minutes", and that no detention or in-school suspension was given to those being 'investigated'.
One could easily pick up on Mr. Smith's tense, agitated body language as the children countered his position - his face was red and  twitching uncontrollably as they spoke! Again, I respect the fact that he could not disclose personal student information, but to penalize the brother to FOUR months in juvenile hall is completely discriminatory if "Zero Tolerance" had not been applied to others with similar violations. The other twin testified to the fact that the student who was beaten provoked the situation in music class by asking Shuki (sp?) to box him.  I am not condoning violence in any way and feel the student should have received some sort of disciplinary action but NOT FOUR MONTHS in jail!! It is reprehensible that school officials did nothing prior to the physical altercation. The students verbally reported their abuse to school officials and trusted that their school would protect them but to no avail!  This is exactly why bullying continues - school officials are too reactionary or do nothing at all until the incident makes headlines (i.e. - Phoebe Prince story in MA - school officials were NOT charged although there were reports made to teachers and administration of bullying...teens charged only).  Students do not tell or "snitch" and are forced to be complacent, possibly out of fear, because the bullies are usually not held accountable by school officials. If there are no consequences to the attacker, it is no wonder students remain silent!
So Dr Phil, while I respect and agree with most - not all - of your advice and ideological beliefs, I do think you gave the VP and lawyer too much credit in trusting they would have been more proactive if the incidents were reported prior to the attack. The children complained in person, not in writing; they were being bullied for years - since 2001 - and NO ONE, no teacher stepped up and informed administrators?? The only students brave enough to do so were the students sitting on your stage...unfortunately, the school required them to complain in "writing" to take it serious, and even then, it was mishandled.
One last comment to the poster below stating the head dress (khimar or hijab) worn by female Muslims are not required by the Qur'an and may be a 'negative distraction' ... Excuse me but "WHAT?" {shaking my head, rolling my eyes}   First off the Qur'an does indeed encourage or require females to dress modestly and  cover themselves in public (see Sura 24:31 in the Qur'an)...and whats more is one of the reasons behind the covering is for PROTECTION and to prevent from being harassed (see Qur'an, Sura 33:58-59). Many of us may not be aware of these religious traditions, but as an educator (and non-Muslim), I make it a point to be aware of any religious and cultural practices in order to create a safe classroom environment for all of my students (many of whom are from diverse ethnic and religious backgrounds). It is MY duty as an educator to EDUCATE students about differences whether its differences in culture, ethnic background,  race, class, gender, sexual orientation, etc..  The suggestion made by the Muslim brother about having a seminar in the school about cultural/religious diversity/awareness is brilliant and should have been conducted years ago!! Are teachers even addressing diversity in their classrooms?? We are all HUMAN and have that commonality but I strongly advocate a CELEBRATION of diversity, not a tolerance for it.  .
Secondly, why is wearing any kind of head dress perceived to be a "negative distraction"?  What constitutes a 'negative distraction" and by whom? Is it a negative distraction when my religious Jewish students who practice Judaism wear their kippah or yamulke (small round headpiece) to class? I think not and thankfully we have laws in this country that protect us from religious discrimination. The solution is creating awareness of cultural and religious diversity or ANY difference that is not part of mainstream society.  Why do you think school shootings occur? Those committing such egregious acts are marginalized, bullied, isolated,  or "different" from the mainstream! Educators are so consumed with testing and standards that these crucial issues are placed on the back burner!  Okay, enough of my ranting!!
Good show but sadly, I saw no resolution or justice for the mother and her students. Hopefully they take their case to the next level and sue the school district!!
 
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