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2010 Shows

 
(Original Air Date: 02/11/10) Today’s teens seem to be more obsessed with love than ever before, and many parents are concerned about the extreme measures their daughters are taking to get and keep a boyfriend. Dean and Lahna say their 17-year-old daughter, Chloe, is obsessed with a boy, Dusty, and they don’t approve. They claim he is a dope-smoking high school dropout who lives on a friend's couch and has taken thousands of dollars from their daughter. Chloe and Dusty say her parents have it all wrong. She says she and Dusty are just friends, and that her parents haven't even given him a chance. Find out what Dr. Phil thinks. And, hear what Dusty has to say — his thoughts may surprise you! Tensions rise as Chloe makes shocking remarks to her mother and walks offstage. Will the teen return to sort out her disagreement with her parents?

Find out what happened on the show.
Comments
Replied By: megand2222 on Oct 29, 2013, 9:46AM
this is sooooo me......
 
Replied By: danielle_dutch on Jan 7, 2011, 8:51AM
I'm living in The Netherlands so this episode just aired today here. Watching this show I just had flashbacks to my mother and little sister. The way Chloe and her mother were talking and behaving to eachother felt similar. It's not just Chloe, her parents are also to blame for this situation. My little sister came to me every time she and my mother were fighting. And after that my mother would tell her side of the story. Both were wrong! But a mother should know better. When a child hit puberty around age 12/13 their brains are still growing. At age 17 the brain is still growing and all thos hormons running to the body. 
I felt sorry for Chloe. How must it have felt when a whole audience is applauding when her parents are talking an laughing when she was talking. She said the right thing "You can laugh all you want, but this is serieus"
 
Replied By: phalexis on Dec 13, 2010, 9:15PM
I've seen the show twice now. After the first time I felt confused, like it didn't entirely make sense, and the second time I felt really bad for Chloe. I felt high levels of sympathetic anxiety, picking up on how anxious and sad she was feeling. I don't think that she's a bad person or just an "hormonal teenager", and definitely disagree with some Dr Phil Community users who have written that she has "mental problems". I admire both Chloe and Dusty for having the courage to express opinions with which her parents, Dr Phil, the producers, and the audience, didn't agree. I admire Chloe for discussing difficult topics, like her resentment towards her parents, her sex life, and the details about her friendship/relationship with Dusty, while people both onstage and offstage openly condemned her feelings and behaviours. I don't think that anybody in the situation is entirely at fault. It would be difficult to be either a parent or their daughter, figuring out your relationship as the daughter moves towards adulthood and independence. In my opinion, the parents could start to show Chloe more respect as a young adult, rather than as parents rearing a child. She seems to be intelligent and capable, and could respond well, developing maturity, and respect towards her parents.
 
Replied By: kaya75 on Oct 27, 2010, 1:08AM
I realise it’s been a few months since the show in the US, but since I’m from Denmark, I haven’t seen it until today. As most people, I too think Chloe was being really disrespectful with her parents and all, but I got the very strong feeling, that it was more from feeling hurt and let down, from missing her parents, especially her mother. It didn’t come across as just a spoiled teen, but as a teen that was really hurting and lonely. I don’t believe that a child, grown up or not, will choose to obsess over love, if she is both self confident and feeling loved and understood by the people most important to her; her parents. And Chloes obsession with Dusty is most likely due to the roll her father plays in her love; the absent parent, that she so longs for. The conflicts with her mother is very classic for teen girls, and I think the mother should consider being more of an equal, than just a parent. Both to keep channels open for an open dialogue, and to let her daughter feel she has someone to trust, someone that understands her. That doesn’t mean the mother (or the father) shouldn’t keep being the parent. But Chloe’s 17, and almost an adult. That means, the role of the parent is almost completed, and so the parent most accept, that there role in there daughters life most now change into something new; equal adults. The parenting never really ends, of course, since our children will for ever, on and off, need our advice, support, love, understanding and trust. And they need to be able to trust us as well. In the case with Chloe, she clearly doesn’t want to realise, that Dusty isn’t that interested in her. And Dusty seems like he doesn’t want to hurt Chloe, by telling her straight up, that he wants her to leave him alone. And I also think, he doesn’t want to lose her as an opportunity. He seems to realise, they shouldn’t be together, but at the same time he’s as depended on their relationship as her. Dusty also made a very intelligent statement, I think, when he commented on Chloes parents lack of understanding and support for Chloe. He was clearly on Chloes side, and I believe he has genuine warm feelings for her. Not as a lover, but as he said; a sister. And when Dusty made that comment, about how little time he parents spend with their children, including Chloe, he clearly stroke a nerve with Chloes dad, who tried to defend himself, saying they used the time they had (not that they used “a lot of time”, just “the time they had”)… Dr. Phil is right: If it isn’t Dusty, it’s somebody else. ‘Cause this is not a question of Dustys character. This is about a young woman feeling hurt and alone, who’s finding the only genuine trust in her personality and her capability as a human being, in a young guy who has felt (and probably still feels) the same hurt and loneliness….
 
Replied By: kaya75 on Oct 27, 2010, 12:52AM
I realise it’s been a few months since the show in the US, but since I’m from Denmark, I haven’t seen it until today. As most people, I too think Chloe was being really disrespectful with her parents and all, but I got the very strong feeling, that it was more from feeling hurt and let down, from missing her parents, especially her mother. It didn’t come across as just a spoiled teen, but as a teen that was really hurting and lonely. I don’t believe that a child, grown up or not, will choose to obsess over love, if she is both self confident and feeling loved and understood by the people most important to her; her parents. And Chloes obsession with Dusty is most likely due to the roll her father plays in her love; the absent parent, that she so longs for. The conflicts with her mother is very classic for teen girls, and I think the mother should consider being more of an equal, than just a parent. Both to keep channels open for an open dialogue, and to let her daughter feel she has someone to trust, someone that understands her. That doesn’t mean the mother (or the father) shouldn’t keep being the parent. But Chloe’s 17, and almost an adult. That means, the role of the parent is almost completed, and so the parent most accept, that there role in there daughters life most now change into something new; equal adults. The parenting never really ends, of course, since our children will for ever, on and off, need our advice, support, love, understanding and trust. And they need to be able to trust us as well. In the case with Chloe, she clearly doesn’t want to realise, that Dusty isn’t that interested in her. And Dusty seems like he doesn’t want to hurt Chloe, by telling her straight up, that he wants her to leave him alone. And I also think, he doesn’t want to lose her as an opportunity. He seems to realise, they shouldn’t be together, but at the same time he’s as depended on their relationship as her. Dusty also made a very intelligent statement, I think, when he commented on Chloes parents lack of understanding and support for Chloe. He was clearly on Chloes side, and I believe he has genuine warm feelings for her. Not as a lover, but as he said; a sister. And when Dusty made that comment, about how little time he parents spend with their children, including Chloe, he clearly stroke a nerve with Chloes dad, who tried to defend himself, saying they used the time they had (not that they used “a lot of time”, just “the time they had”)… Dr. Phil is right: If it isn’t Dusty, it’s somebody else. ‘Cause this is not a question of Dustys character. This is about a young woman feeling hurt and alone, who’s finding the only genuine trust in her personality and her capability as a human being, in a young guy who has felt (and probably still feels) the same hurt and loneliness….
 
Replied By: rnkellyi on Aug 13, 2010, 6:13PM
My 18 yr old daughter graduated high school and a few months later a 32 yr old talked his sweet talk into her life, she became obsessed  with him and moved in with him right away and is now pregnant on purpose. Im assuming her way of having a part of him or for her to keep him..Little does she realize she will change and evolve and the newness will wear off and she will find out he is not the man of her dreams just an infatuation a way to find attention..Im at my wits end and am disgusted by this grown man getting my teenager pregnant! She is an adult to make her own choices but she is making bad ones for the wrong reasons and not thinking what a baby is going to do to her fairytale romance! HELP!
 
Replied By: rnkellyi on Aug 13, 2010, 6:09PM - In reply to jonakabr
Your reply struck me because I have had the same EXACT  problem happen with my 18 yr old daughter. She ran off with a 32 year old with a world full of issues..Now she is pregnany with his baby..She pretty much went from my house to his in a matter of months wanting an instant family.They both dont make alot of money and expect us grandparents to  help them..She got pregnant on prupose I know for attention and to have something to always love her. The guy has a felony record and my daughter thinks a good company will hire him, she believes his lies..The guy hasnt even proposed. What kind of grown man  dates a teenager I have asked many? My answer to this would be: An insecure man with deep issues and self esteem problems, a guy who can talk a niave teen girl into anything. Now my daughter has a kid on the way and no college education..I will love her no matter what but I will not support her financially. That is his problem now since she thinks she is a grown up.Good luck in your situation, I know im in for a hell of a ride
 
Replied By: salinas on Jul 21, 2010, 10:52AM
Clearly there is something wrong with this girl.  It shouldn't be all that surprising.  In my opinion the mother has some pretty serious issues herself.  It is just easier for the mother to cover up her part because she can hide behind how she's just trying to do her motherly job and obviously it works because there was not much attention paid to that.  There were points brought up that indicate the mother tries to compete with this girl (not normal or a good thing). She tried to be a teenager like her daughter by chatting on FB w the daughter's friends, etc.   In the mother's view, they had a good relationship before.  In the daughter's view they did not.  I'm thinking they never did or else it wouldn't have gotten to what it has.  The mother must have been happy when the daughter was younger and she could easily control and manipulate her.  Mom must have abused that and that is why the girl has ended up this way.  I can't help but think that this girl must have learned her manipulative ways from her mother.  What you put into your children is what you get out of them.  Yes, I am a parent too.  I have 2 teenage sons.
 
Replied By: skip2mylulu on Jul 14, 2010, 10:37AM
I don't know why teens insist on putting their "affections" for a person before all logic and reasoning.  Maybe they feel they can't trust the adults, maybe they feel judged?  Maybe they feel unloved and sometimes neglected.  I have a cousin who is 14 years old, that was calling  a boy she was dating her "husband".   Of course, she doesn't date him anymore, she got her feelings hurt because she put his needs and wants before her own and disregarded her family.   I don't understand what they are looking for, I wish they would tell us so we can spare them the hurt and heartache they will one day endure.  We as parents must be able to discern and inform our children of the difference between love and obsession.
 
Replied By: misttique on Jul 2, 2010, 3:15AM - In reply to jocelyn0990
I think it is a serious lack of insight to only see this young woman as a "brat" and sex life broadcast.  Chloe is good at smoke screening, that is clear.  Especially when you have audience that can only see that she's a "brat" and her sex life was absolutely any part of this show.  I don't even think "lovestruck" or "defiance" or "boyfriend" issues were part of the show.  I think we have a seriously mentally disturbed young woman headed on a path of destruction for all she meets in life.  She will look beautiful because she's fairly attractive and I believe her parents will manage to get her educated.  She is fairly intelligent and presents well.  She lies to get what she wants, she has little or no insight, has no reason to change and never will (because she sees ife as she chooses), and she will cause damage to friends (who will believe her and try to help her), to boyfriends (who will do the same), to anyone in her path. She will likely attain some success in life thanks to her looks and parents pushing all the right things for her, but she's missing a piece of the insides that tells you right and wrong.  It's scarey that we spawn folks like that in our lives but we do.  The only blessing would be is if she sees that she should never have children.  She's selfish enough to perhaps see that and I hope she does.
 
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