March 26, 2017
Latest Entry: RESPONSE
Hello often I am finding myself wondering if anyone has received all my messages, e-mails and cry for help or am I just that of a Throw away. I just want to hear those words I will never give up on you I will see this through no matter what you are important, and you matter.
March 26, 2017
Latest Entry: How do I know if I am a victim?
He has hit me, but I usually instigate.  Wrong, I know.  I just sometimes lose it, get scared and react.  He is 6'0 tall, I am 4'09, I have 3 children all under 10.  He has a tendancy to grit his teeth, pump his fists, break things, cuss at all of us, throw things, threaten myself, my children, and my senior citizen father with violence.  So yes, when I hit many times it is out of pure fear.  But my concern is his verbal and emotional stuff.  He calls me names daily, always makes sly innuendo about me cheating, which I have never done.  He lies all the time, about little things even, I have caught him.  He searches out females on social media, is obsessed with porn.  Degrades us all in a way without doing it direct, if that makes sense.  He blames me for "bitching" for calling me a bitch, ugly, whore, etc.  He even called our 10 month old daughter a bitch, 3 seperate times.  My mother passed 10 months ago, last week he looked me in my eyes and said "Your mommy is dead, get over it".  He has called my children names, yells at them for no reason.  Threatens my 4 year old that he will "whoop his ass", always playful, but daily.  My son has began to blame himself for EVERYTHING.  It is so hard to sum up all I go through and deal with.  If we are broke it is my fault.  He makes sure my family knows that he is bigger and stronger, and can beat us all up.  He is 41 and threatens me with his "family connections", threatens to take my chidlren from me.  I had to call the police, who blamed me for it all because he took half my living room furniture with my 10 month old and 9 year old standing there, and threw it all over. This was because I told him we need to talk about fixing our relationship.  My question is:  Am I a victim of a form of domestic violence, or is this just me being the type that looks for a problem?  Everyone in his family say he is dangerous.But he is the breadwinner, and knows it, I am stuck.  And with the loss of my mom, my children do not need another blow of big and bad changes especially so quickly.
March 23, 2017
Latest Entry: Sex Trafficing
The recent show about the women who was born into sex trafficing was hard to believe.  I have so many questions I don't know where to begin.  If this case is true, how did she get out, where is she staying and working?  What kind of work is she doing? How is she getting away with murder and if Dr. Phil can verify this which he said he did, then were any arrests made?  I was so disgusted and horrified by this this story, I stopped watching Dr. Phil.
March 21, 2017
Latest Entry: Entry Title
I find the Sex Trafficking girl's story hard to believe. First, how was she able to leave her abuser to appear and tell her story to Dr. Phil and he not know. It makes no sense.
March 19, 2017
Latest Entry: Spanking Is Not the Answer to Child Behavior Problems
Almost every stressed out parent at one time or another feels the temptation to spank a child. Some parents today still swear by it as the most effective form of discipline, while others say it is child abuse, plain and simple.

Research highlighted in a US News and World Report article adds more validity to the assertion that spanking is harmful to children. Researchers in Canada found that up to 7 percent of a range of mental health disorders were associated with physical punishment, which included spanking and other forms of hitting or shoving. Best reference of  http://babygearguide.net/best-portable-play-yard/

A separate study published in 2009 in Pediatrics also indicates spanking is an inappropriate form of discipline. Researchers at Tulane University found that kids' short-term response to spanking led to them to act out more in the long run, according to a Time Magazine article. Of the 2,500 kids in the study, those spanked more frequently at age 3 were more likely to be aggressive by age 5.

 

Disciplining a child is never simple, but there are many of alternatives to physical punishment that can be just as effective. These methods tend to be more effective in encouraging behavior changes, as well.

Here are some better ways to discipline a child:

Time-out for the child: This is a common strategy used by parents. For time-outs to work best, be sure that you are placing the child in an isolated place with no toys, television or playmates in range. Be consistent about how much time the child will spend in time-out and consider setting a timer, so the child knows an end is in sight.  The rule of thumb is that a child should be in time out for one minute for each age of the child.  Time-out is appropriate for ages 3 to 6, but not younger or older.

Time-out for the parent: Parents are most tempted to spank when they are tired or frustrated. If you feel a rush of anger coming on, give yourself a time-out by leaving the room for a moment or asking another adult to take over.  Once you have calmed down, go back and talk to your child about the problem, and decide if a punishment such as a loss of privileges is appropriate.

·Loss of privileges: If your child will not follow a rule, make it clear that the consequence will be the loss of a toy or game for a younger child or computer or phone time for an older child. This could also apply to outings, such as the loss of a trip to the zoo or a sleepover at a friend's house. Available resource about  http://babygearguide.net/best-travel-crib/, you can check out...

· Distraction/positive redirection: Often with younger children, a simple distraction or redirection to a new activity is enough to interrupt their behavior. For example, if the child is jumping on the furniture and not responding to requests to stop, try redirecting the child toward a more constructive activity. If you make it seem fun, your child will be excited to engage with you.

· Positive reinforcement over negative: Another tool to improve your child's discipline is to praise their good behavior, especially when it is something you want your child to increase. Try rewarding your child with verbal praise or even additional time with a favorite activity for behaving so well at the grocery store that day, for example. The more you draw their attention to the good behavior, the more they'll want to please you again.  Younger children respond well to stickers and stamps, but be consistent with your positive reinforcement.  Don't threaten to withhold positive reinforcement, just "catch them being good."

There are more resources for disciplinary alternatives to spanking. Visit DisciplineToday for more advice on this topic. And if you're really struggling to effectively discipline your child, consider making an appointment with a qualified professional who can help you develop and effective, and safe behavior plan.
March 17, 2017
Latest Entry: Depression
I'm stressing over my ex boyfriend who got back together with his ex gf. They have been sleeping together and it's making me jealous, stressing, upset, and is making me cry. Him and I have dated 3 times online in the past 2 years. I've known him for 4 years. I know he's real because I've seen his instagram, his twitter, and his Snapchat. I got back to talking to him ab a week ago to get my mind off of certain things. He said he wants to get back with me and he wants me to stay single and to not worry ab him. I mean him and his gf go to the same college together in England and live in the Seattle. I'm worrying a lot and I'm freaking out. I feel like he's gonna break me again and he told me he's not. Idk what to believe anymore. I want my ex boyfriend back more than anything. I've tried moving on and I've tried other relationships but they never worked. I love him and I've never stopped loving him since our last breakup. I've always wanted to spend my life with him. I know he's the one regardless of how many times him and I broke up. I know he's my soulmate because I fell for him since I was in the 9th grade and I'm in 12th grade. He's in college all the way in England. He's heading back to Seattle for his springbreak and can't come down to where I live (Florida) because he is leaving when his gf leaves which I'm upset ab. He even said he would let me know when the two of them break up and he promised he would get back together with me. I mean do college relationships last forever? I asked him if he was sleeping with her and he said it's private. I mean I don't get why asking about sex can be private. I just don't know what to do and I'm freaking out. All I'm feeling is worry, stress, and him having sex with his gf is in my head all the time which I'm scared he's never gonna break up with her, and jealousy. Should I be scared? Should I wait? I wanna wait for him. He didn't say how long the relationship will last. How can I stop worrying ab him and her? I swear I've got this bad feeling in my stomach and my bones. I've could never get any sleep ab it. I've had it this feeling since I went back to talking to him. Plz help me.
March 17, 2017
Latest Entry: Cheating
I can't get past my husband's cheating because I am always suspicious especially after finding 4 different women number on his cell phone. How do I get past it if I want marriage to work
March 14, 2017
Latest Entry: Despertly need help
I have been dating my boyfriend sence octber of 2014, but have known him sence the 4th grade. But very sence Gene and I have been living together the X wife better known as Kay will not let Gene alone. She has him buing her trires for her car to working on the grown kidas cars for free and buying the parts. The kids In qustion are 28 and 33 and still on daddy's car insurence. And Kay has a list for him to do for her when gose over. Help me Please.
March 9, 2017
Latest Entry: Letters to Sgt Barnes
Has there ever been a time in your life when you thought, "man, I just need a break!" you do everything the right way and try to help others along the way. In most cases you get that break to move forward and try harder in your life. Then there are other circumstances when you dont get that break, in stead you get the book thrown at you! I'm here to tell my brothers story in hopes to bring justice where it is due and peace for all involved.
March 8, 2017
Latest Entry: I'm Lost
Man, I wish I could do the stuff all of you guys do. I'm 22 and suffer from an extreme anxiety disorder. I barely graduated high school because of it. (2013) Since than, my life has been nothing but hell. I feel so lost in life to the point I have no idea what to do. I honestly don't understand the point of life. People say "God put you here for a reason." I have yet to find my reason. I can not do anything. Anytime I leave my house, I get so sick and throw up. I can not keep a job. I get so anxious. All I want to do is provide a happy life for my beautiful girlfriend. Since I have been unable to do that, I feel like a complete failure. I've tried different medication and therapists. Nothing worked. I wish I had an opportunity to move away from my home town and start somewhere fresh. I'll never have the money to do that. I've been stuck in this funk and i don't know how much more I can take. I don't even know why I'm typing this right now. In the end, it will be pointless and nothing will come of it. For all of you people that did get through the hard times in your life, whatever it may be, I'm happy for you. I'm happy you get to enjoy life. Get out there and make something of yourself. Cause God knows I would die to have a life worth living.
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